Susanmillers Blog

My life as a heterosexual crossdresser.

Sunday Susan time and a quick story

It is Sunday and I am getting a little Susan time, yes, a trip to Starbucks for a few hours to do work and write my blog from last night at the Escape. Now a little story as last night Nicole and I were talking about times we went out and I shared a story about getting acrylic nails that I don’t think I ever posted in a blog as it was before this blog started. Years ago, back in the late 90’s before I really started going out, a big night out was to leave home after 11 pm and drive around for an hour or so and if things were just right a trip through Burger kings drive through. Anyway, those who follow my blog know I love acrylic nails. Now it is always funny when a woman tells me about how expensive it is to get nails and I just don’t understand it as I do. The first several time I got nails were really expensive. I actually got a motel room for 3 nights usually a Thursday, Friday and Saturday. Worked up all my courage to dress and go to the nail salon and get acrylic nails. And then spent most of the time in the motel room as Susan with the late-night drives then went and got them removed. It was $200 or more to have them for 3 days when everything was added in.

Well back to my story, I think it was either 1998 or 1999 in the spring and I had a week of vacation I had to use or lose it so I took a week of and had no plans. At this time, I had a roommate so the reason I rented motel rooms. any way I had told no one I was taking the week off, I just figured I would get some Susan time at home while my roommate was working. Well the week before my vacation he told me he was going out of town for 3 to 4 weeks on a job. I could hardly hide my joy as now I could get acrylic nails and have them for the whole week. This was actually only the second time I had gotten acrylic nails and it was just a couple months after the first time so I called the same nail salon and made an appointment for Friday night.

Now I love red nails and never thought much of French nails, I think French can look really pretty if they are not to long and you have smaller fingers so I never thought about them. Friday came and Susan worked up the courage to go to the salon and I got long acrylic nails. The lady doing them kept trying to get me to get French and finally said try them and if you don’t like them, she could paint over them so I did. Soon I had long French nails and I been right I don’t think they look as good on my hands but I decided to keep them as they were figuring I could come back and get them painted so I went home for the night. N9w Saturday morning I got up with my nails and went down and made breakfast and sat watching TV as I thought what I could do. Should I be Susan at home or go out as my male self with my nails and see if anyone noticed as I figured I could kind of hide them in my pockets. As I sat there my front door opened and in walked my roommate. Turns out the construction job he was working out of town got red flagged and shut down for a week so he was off work. Well I quickly hid my hand in my pocket as he explained this. Now what should I do, well luckily the French nails were not noticeable unless I had my hands open. Well I ended up keeping my nails and every morning I would get up and leave as normal and go to the mall or library as my male self with my nails. I actually kept them till the following Friday before removing them of course with him home I couldn’t do it as Susan so I had to go as my male self. I told the lady a friend had done my nails as practice for school and was going to remove them tomorrow but I got called into work and had to get them off now and she seemed to by my story. So, any way the only time I have had French nails actually worked out for me but since then they have always had color as I just like color better. Here is an old picture of them.

Well back to today. I got ready and was on my way by 4:30 a little later than I wanted. I decided to wear my jeggings I bought a few years ago. They are stretchy pants that fit tight and look like jeans. I got my corset on yes, I wear it most times I go out as it gives me a nice shape. I got it tightened and pulled up my jeggings and couldn’t get them closed, just not stretchy enough so it was either take the corset off or tighten it up. Well I am sure you guessed which way I went. I tightened it more and still just not enough so one more time tightening it while sucking in my tummy and breathing out my air. I got the Jeggings closed and I was ready to leave, wow hard to breath can only take shallow half breaths. W I understand what a corset can really do as I have an awesome shape tonight. I went straight to Starbucks as I have a lot of leftovers from Thanksgiving so I figure when I get home tonight, I will eat so no Subway this week. Now it really was hard to get into my car as I can not bend over at all and I actually got a little out of breath.

I went into Starbucks and they were not real busy so I put my computer on a table and went to order my drink. The lady working the counter remembered me and asked if I wanted my hot chocolate, I went with a green sweetened ice tea. Yes, I am kind of strange that way. I go to Bars and don’t drink and I go to Starbucks but can’t stand coffee. As I was getting my drink one of the girls from the drive though said hi to me and said wow twice in one day. I kid of looked at her and she said didn’t you come through the drive through a couple hours ago. I said no but bow I am wondering if there is a lady out there that looked kind of like I do and if so, would be funny to run into her here, well I think it would be funny if I looked like her, she might not feel the same way if she looked like me.

I sat and wrote my blog from last night and the able I was at was by the window. As they are small table and I can plug my computer in but they are also a little chilly there so by a little after 6 I was up for another drink and this time it was my hot chocolate, by the way Starbucks make awesome hot chocolate. I sat back down and caught up on some e-mails and did some work and then just goofed off in the internet for the rest of the evening. I did take a couple selfies but the lighting inside and the shadows I just didn’t like them but this was the better of the two.

I stayed till 8 before going home to eat and then getting ready for bed as I get up early for work. It was a relaxing evening out. By the way I looked back in my blogs and I think the first time I wrote about going to Starbucks was in the fall of 2009 but ready my blog I think I may have gone a time or two before and maybe not wrote about it. But it looks like I have been going to Starbucks as Susan for at least 9 years. This is my 1114th blog and it seems I had other outing that I may not have written about. That is a lot of Susan time. 10 years ago, I would never have imagined I would be enjoying life as Susan and going out like this. Here is an early blog when I went out with Alice and a cute picture of the two of us. As you can see from my early blogs I have gotten better at writing and a little more long winded, but back then the blogs were for me to document what I did for me. I never thought anyone would find my blog let alone read it.

Thanks for reading and be sure and see what Susan is up to on my most recent blog.

Okay one quick selfie when I got home


November 30, 2018 Posted by | Starbucks | , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Saturday night out at Escape, getting back into the routine.

It is the Saturday after Thanksgiving and I hope and pray you all had a wonderful one. Mine was good a little quiet, I had my mom over for the day and cooked dinner. It was a little different this year as I did the same thing last year for both my parents. It has been 9 weeks since my Dad passed away and it does get easier but there are certain things that you remember, things you did together and those can be hard. it was a good day though. Any way as I said it is Saturday night and I am going out to the Escape for a few hours. I had hoped to be there by 5pm but I didn’t get home till after 4:30 so I set my sights on 6 and started getting ready. I knew the dress I was going to wear. It was about 5:45 when I was ready and went to the closet for my dress and of course changed my mind and went with my black and gold dress instead. Got my nails on and was out the door. I got to the Escape just after 6 and parked right in front and went in.

They were not as busy as last week and I was able to get my usual table in hopes others would show up, I posted in our group I would be here between 6 & 7. I went to the bar and ordered dinner and my drink, Sprite as I don’t drink. It is funny as when I first started going out, I think I was the only girl that didn’t drink, now I would say it is 30% to 40% and some of those who do drink have one or two and then switch to pop. There was a young lady at the bar that came over and talked to me, her name was Nicole and she thought I looked beautiful, now she had been drinking but I still took it as a compliment. I really do love being complimented on how I look as Susan, in my male life never really give this much thought. I stood there and talked with her for 5 to 10 minutes before going to my table. I no more than got my computer out and my dinner came so I ate it while responding to an E-mail. A few weeks back I went through some of my friends I have not heard from in a while and sent them an e-mail. I got a reply from Kendra who I have not seen in probably 6 years. She is still doing well and took a break from being Kendra but it is coming back again. I have learned this from myself. I could probably stop dressing if it was a life or death issue but Susan would always be with me, a part of me and I would think about her and dressing all the time. I am hoping one of the times she gets to Portland she will have some Kendra tine and we can get together. It is so easy to lose touch with people especially when you only know one side, or part of them.

Well as I finished my e-mail Nicole showed up, she came down from the Seattle area to go out with us. She gets down here 4 to 6 times a year and I always look forward to seeing her. I remember the first time I met her at Washington Square mall. It was February of 2014, yes, I cheated and looked it up in my blog. Wow I have known her for almost 5 years and she goes out almost twice a week now. I really have made some wonderful friends. She ordered dinner also. Bobbie also showed up so there were 3 of us. We ate and talked and it was so much fun. She was telling me how she brought several dresses down for tonight as she was not sure what she would feel like wearing and of course I told her how I changed my mind on what I was going to wear tonight and also my first Diva Las Vegas in which I too almost everything. I had enough dresses on that trip to wear 2 every day plus and several skirts and capri and enough tops to also have 2 a day just to be safe. It is so much fun being a girl. Nicole also has a blog that is private and that is okay, I would encourage everyone to have some kind of record of your life for later on, she writes what she ore and where she went and puts pictures of her outfits. I look Back on my blog all the time, how I found when I met Nicole. Now I did take a selfie when I first got here should have gotten a picture with Nicole.

Now the girl I met at the bar when I first got here came over again so I got to introduce Nicole to Nicole, how cute. We talked for a few minutes and another girl name Melinda came over. I have never met either of them before but they wanted up to dance with them, yes, they have both been drinking. Well I explained I was not a dancer but this didn’t seem to register with them as they took hold of my hand and pretty much pulled me to the floor, well I wasn’t fighting to hard. so now Nicole and Melinda, and Bobbie, Nicole and I were out dancing the best I could. Now I know my body does not bend the way theirs does but I tried as I could, of course I had my corset on which also limited my movement. We probably only dance 5 or 10 minutes before we went back to our table and I was a little out of breath, yes, the corset does limit your breathing. Melinda talked with us a little more before she went back and joined her friend.

Robyn also showed up as did another girl from our group. There was also another transgendered woman here with I assume her wife but they sat together at a small table. I did wave at them but wasn’t sure if I should go over as they seemed to be on their own and I didn’t want to interrupt them. 9 pm came and Karaoke started so it got a little loud and hard to talk but it was still fun. Nicole stayed later tonight as she made it till a little after 10pm, she usually leaves at 9 when Karaoke starts. She might make it down in December but if not, she will be down in January. It was sad to see her leave but it was a great night, I did tell her the Starbucks I am going to now a she did pop in on me once at the Starbucks by my house as her male self of course. Would be so fun if she could meet me at Starbucks as Nicole.

Laurie also showed up just before 10 so we actually had 5 of us tonight, a smaller group but a lot of fun. I stayed till a little after 11 before paying my bill and heading home. It was a fun night out a I got to see my friends. It is hard when you don’t see your friends as they are a big part of one’s life. Cassandra has not been out much and with the holidays, she is really busy so I am guessing it will be after the first of the year before we can get together again and Julie is out of town for a few months although she may come back for a few days from time to time and I am hoping we can get together. I did talk with Cassandra on the phone the other night for almost an hour as we are planning on Diva Las Vegas next March as we both want to go that is if I can get the time off. The week they picked is not good for me at work but I am hoping to work it out. We are talking about going earlier and then leaving the Friday it ends so we only have 1 weekend in Las Vegas s it has gotten expensive. 5 years ago, we went for 9-night, 2 weekend and stayed on the strip and we paid lees than $400. Looking quickly online for the next Diva Las Vegas we are looking at $650 to $900 for 9 night and 1 weekend if we stay downtown and $1400 to $1900 if we stay on the Strip. I actually like the downtown more as the hotel casinos are no as big and massive so easier to get around and go between casinos plus you can find $5 blackjack. On the strip it is $10 on a weekday, $15 in the evenings and who knows about weekend. I like to play for fun so much rather have a cheep table. It was a wonderful night out though.

Thanks for reading and be sure and check out my most recent blog to see what is new in Susan’s life.

November 25, 2018 Posted by | Escape Bar & Grill, Out and about as Susan, T-girl | , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Sunday Susan time and another first.

Okay it is Sunday before Thanksgiving and I have some free time and that means Susan time. I want to wish everyone a Happy Thanksgiving and know that what I am most thankful for is my family and friends and that includes all of you! Now there is another first for Susan that I will share. Now something I don’t talk much about but I pretty much wear ladies’ panties all the time now. It kind of started years ago and I didn’t wear them all the time but as my men’s wore out, I just bought more female ones till now that is all I really have which leads to my problem. A few days ago, I was doing laundry and my dryer went out, it is 27 years old so it had a good life. So yesterday I went to home Depot and bought a brand-new front load energy efficient washer and dryer (my washer is 16 years old). They had them on sale for 40% off still with pedestals, and the part to install it and tax it used up most of what I had set aside for the Cruise I didn’t get to go on. The cruise would have been more fun and a lot of better memories but hopefully the new ones will last as long as my last ones, any way a little off topic. I took all my wash over to where my mom lives and did it this morning but I couldn’t take Susan’s stuff over there. So, as I was getting ready, I put all of it in the washing machine. It was about 3:30 when I was ready to go. I loaded up Susan’s wet clothes and off to a laundry mat a couple miles from where I live to use one of their machines to dry them. Now there were a couple ladies there doing their wash and one worker as you can drop off your laundry for them to do for you also. I put my laundry in the dryer and got my computer out as I waited for them to dry. Now as I said this is a first not just for Susan but also my male self as I have always had a washer dryer at home to use. My new ones will be delivered on Saturday December 1st as that was the soonest, they could do it on a Saturday, I could have had it this week but they give you a 4-hour delivery time and the latest is 1 to 5 and they don’t let you know till the night before which is hard for people who work.

Well I got done with my clothes and left here about 4:15 and drove to the Subway near my house for something to eat. There were about 10 people inside eating which is the most I have seen but it was close to dinner time. I got my sandwich and sat down and ate it. It was a little after 5 when I was done and went to Starbuck’s, again I didn’t go to the one right by my house but one about a mile away as it is open till 8:30pm both are really nice and the staff is wonderful at both but the one by my house closes at 7 which would give me less than 2 hours and Susan needs more time than that.

They were a little busy but it is a bigger one so still able to get a table. I ordered my sweetened green ice tea and sat down. One of the ladies brought me my drink and told me how much she liked my top which I thanked her. I just love getting compliments. I sat and did my Blog from Saturday night which was a lot of fun. Mellissa and I talked a little last night not only about our Wednesday night dinners but trying to do one Saturday night dinner a month and see if we can get more girls to come out. I like going to the Escape but it really is about being out with people and seeing my friends and not so much about the bar or where we are as I don’t drink and I have yet to get the courage to sing Karaoke by myself. I finished up my blog and then moved on to e-mails and some work I needed to do. I still love the fact that I can do some of my work as Susan, in a way it is like she is earning some of my pay check. Susan really doesn’t need to earn money as my male self will pretty much give her anything she wants. It is funny as when I buy something for my male self, I analyze it, do I need it, will I use it, is it worth it. For Susan it is simple, is it cute and do I want it. I know it may confuse people when I talk about the two sides of me that way as if they are different people, trust me they are not but when I first started going out, I really did separate them that way, I looked at them and treated them as two different sides of me. Over the years I have come to accept the fact they are in fact one and the same. Susan is always with me even if not visible and the same for my male self. I would not be who I am or a complete person without both of them. All those years I told myself I could quit being Susan, could quit dressing, quit the makeup, I know now I can’t and once I accepted that my life became clear and so much better. Now I am not saying this is how everyone is or should be this is how I feel and what is right for me.

Now as I sat at Starbucks there were several people around and there was one lady sitting here and occasionally, she would walk around and she did stop at my table and say hi and ask me my name. I think she is homeless and inside getting warm. I felt bad for her and wondered what I could do, I don’t like to give cash. I thought about getting a gift card or just buying her a drink. I decided I would get her a $10 gift card as she could get a warm drink and also a little food if she wanted. now one bad thing is I had 3 of my nails come off tonight which is really rare, I am thinking dealing with my wet laundry while getting ready my nails weren’t dry when I put them on, or maybe the wet laundry at the laundry mat loosened them. I guess Susan is not meant to do laundry so that will go back to being a job for my male self. You can see how I do my nails on my blog and they really work well if you have clean dry nails to start with and I think that was my problem tonight.

I stayed here till a little after 8 before heading home. It was a good night out for Susan. Be sure and keep up with what is new in Susan’s life on my most recent blog.

Okay have to post this, it is a picture from Saturday night that Sasha took and I love it. I have a nice smile (smiles always make you look better) plus I am not looking directly at the camera so there is a nice angle to the picture and that also gives a little bit of shadow which softens the look. Let me know what you think

Have a Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

November 19, 2018 Posted by | Starbucks | , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Saturday night at the Escape

Okay I am getting back into going out as Susan and tonight I am going to the Escape for a while and I am looking forward to it. First though before I started getting ready, I did my Christmas light on my house, okay I cheated as I got a few of the Laser projected lights at Walmart, they have them on sale for 19.99 and are very cool. Took me less than a half hour to get set up, just have to wait till it is dark or at least a little darker to make sure they are projecting on my house correctly. It was about 3:30 when I started getting ready. I was all ready well accept for my dress and lipstick by 4:45. Now before I did my lipstick and dress, I slipped on my pants and a shirt and went out to position my lights. It was dark enough to see them on the house although it was still light outside. I spent about 20 minutes adjusting the lights outside in my front yard with full makeup on accept for the aforementioned lipstick. Now I realize no one would really notice unless they came over to talk to me as I was facing my house and not the street. It was a little after 5 when I went in and did my lipstick bright red and put my dress, heels and hair on and was on my way.

I like getting to the Escape early as parking is easier and it gives me a little time on my computer before friends show up. As I got close, I noticed a lot of cars parked on the street which is not normal for this early and the parking lot was full. I pulled back on the street and as I was going by the parking lot to go find a parking place a car pulled out so I was able to pull right back in and get a spot almost right in front of the door. I went in and they were packed, I don’t think I have eve seen it this busy. There was only 1 small table by the window so I took it. Now I had to go stand in line to order dinner. Turns out there was a group here celebrating a lady 70th birthday. I got back to my table and got out my computer, now over the next hour at least 7 women came over and talked with me, 3 asked if I knew the birthday girl as they thought I was part of the group. I explained I was just here to meet some friends later. They were fine with and even gave me a piece of cake.

Now I wasn’t sure who all would be here tonight other than Bobbie and most likely Sasha as Sasha posted in the group if anyone was going here tonight and I replied. Now occasionally girls will post in the group they are thinking of going someplace but I have found if you want people to show up you have to say you will be there as some are bot willing to go unless they know for sure someone will be there. I said I would be here from 6 till 10 so that is what I will do. Now they had a DJ playing dance music for the party so it was loud from the start. A little before 7 Mellissa and her wife showed up and it was nice to see them. We talked for a little while but it was hard ton hear so they didn’t stay long.

I little after 7 Laura M showed up, turns out she was meeting a friend who just came out as Transgender. They have known each other for years but didn’t know this about each other, small world. Her friend showed up shortly after, Venessa and her girlfriend Rickie. Laura introduced me and they were bot awesome. Now the funny part, Laura and Venessa sat and talked about the thing they did as guys now that they are female, two ladies talking about masculine things they did.

Bobbie showed up as did Sasha, Robyn and another girl from our group. It was nice to see Sasha and Robyn as I have not seen them for a while. As it got closer to 9 when Karaoke starts the party started to wind down and the normal table, we sit at opened up so we moved over there. Way more comfortable to sit in a chair with a back and that you can put your feet on the ground then a tall bar stool. Laura, Venessa, Rickie and I talked some more and I got to know them better and they really are nice ladies. I look forward to talking with them again sometime. I really do like meeting new people something I am not good at as my male self, I am way shyer when I am not Susan. Now as Karaoke started it started getting busier again although it really was busy the whole night. A little before 10 Laurie showed up so we had a good turnout tonight. I ended up staying till midnight so another late night but it was a wonderful evening out as I met sine new people, Venessa and Rickie and got to spend time with my friends. Now I am looking forward to Sunday night as I plan to go out again to Starbucks for a little personal Susan time.

Okay I didn’t get any pictures tonight but Sasha took a few and got one of me that I just love, besides the smile and the angle as I am not looking at the camera there is a nice shadow on my face which I think softens the picture. Let me know what you think.

November 18, 2018 Posted by | Escape Bar & Grill, Out and about as Susan | , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Sunday time as Susan

It is Sunday November 11th 2018 Veteran’s and the 100th year anniversary of the ending of WWI. Now I was never in the military but both my parents were and I have a lot of friends both as Susan and my male self that were. I want to thank you all for your service, you are why we have the freedoms we do. No matter what your political beliefs are, what your life style is you owe a debit to these brave men and woman. I am proud to live in this great country, proud to be an American, proud of our flag and proud of all our veteran’s.

Now I had some free time this afternoon and evening and of course that means some Susan time. I got ready and was on my way by 4. Now usually I have been going to Starbuck’s and then going to get something to eat after but that has been around 8 or later when I eat so I decided to mix it up today and go to Subway first and eat. Now again this is close to my house but that is okay now. This is also a subway I have gone to for years as my male self although it has been weeks since I was here other than as Susan. Now being a little after 4 I figured they would be busy but they weren’t. I was the only one here. The same lady who made my sandwich last week was here again and remembered me and asked how my day was going. We talked as she made my sub sandwich. When it was done, she asked if it was for here or to go and I said here although I asked her to cut one of the halves in half again which she did and then asked if I was taking half of it to go and I said yes so, she wrapped it separate. I figured I would eat half here and sneak the other half into Sawbuck’s for later. Now sure how Starbuck’s would feel bringing in outside food as they do sell some food items and I figured ¼ of sandwiches would not be as noticeable. I spent about a half hour here eating before going to Starbucks, again I didn’t go to the ne right by my house as they close at 7 instead, I went to one about a half mile further which is open till 8:30 as I figure I have eaten I can stay a little later. By the way I did take a selfie inside Subway.

I got to Starbucks and went in, there was only about 12 people there but there were two groups of 5 at the bigger tables so the tables along the windows were open which is where I like to sit as I can plug my computer in if needed. I ordered my drink and sat down and wrote my blog for yesterday. I also caught up on some work, I so love the fact I can do work as Susan even if no one at work knows about Susan or this side of me. It is a really relaxing way to spend a few hours and work is just somehow better doing it as Susan.

Okay onto a crossdressing topic as I was talking with a friend and we got onto the topic of attraction. Now let me clarify this is how I feel, my opinion and what is right for me and in no way translates or represents other. Sad, I have to put this disclaimer in but I do not want to offend anyone. I am a straight male, as Susan or my male self, I am attracted to females. When I am Susan I try to dress and present myself as the female I am attracted to. The things I notice first of a woman is her face, now before I get comments what I am looking for is a smile and how she does her makeup. If she is smiling that is a plus, if she has lipstick on a plus, red lipstick, big plus. I also look at her nails, long pretty nails a plus. Smooth, soft, clean skin in other words no tattoos a plus, this is where I will get in trouble. I am not against tattoo’s and have dated woman with tattoos. what I mean by this is I have never looked at a woman and said wow check out those tattoo’s I got to talk with her. But I am not against dating a woman with tattoos. are they wearing a dress or skirt a plus, heels a plus. Long hair a plus. That would describe my ideal woman. Now that being said I have only dated 1 woman with long nails. Only 3 had long hair most didn’t like to wear dresses or heels unless it was something special and I would say about half had tattoos. And none of them liked red lipstick. Just because that is what I find attractive to me doesn’t mean that is the only choice. Again, this is just that vision in my mind of the perfect woman and we all now that there is no such thing as perfection.

Now for the second topic, men. I get asked a lot how I can dress as I do, try to be as pretty and as feminine as I can and not want a man. Simple look above for what I find attractive. I like a soft body, smooth (no hair on body). The curves of a woman. Simply put there is nothing I find attractive about the male body. I am not saying others can’t be attracted to the male form its just not for me. That being said I do like having people tell me I am pretty, male or female. It is flattering. Now that being said I can say a man can be handsome as I can appreciate beauty in all forms even if I am not attracted to them. Kind of like looking at a painting. There are many forms and styles of painting and I can appreciate all of them and see the beauty in them but if I am going to hang one on my wall it would be a seascape, maybe with a boat or ship or a mountain painting as that is what I really like. So simply put I can see beauty and appreciate it without being attracted to it. Attraction is separate from recognizing beauty.

It is so easy to say this is how I feel and so everyone else must feel the same and that is almost never the case. We are all individuals and although we may feel the same on some things there will be differences and that is good. Life would be boring if we were all the same. It is these differences that make life fun, makes it fun to meet other people and get to know them. So just because someone is different than you don’t just write them off, get to know them and you will find there are things you have in common and things you like.

Now back to Starbucks’s. I stayed here till 8:30 and there were times it got really busy inside and times there were only a few of us, this Starbucks has a drive through and so it doesn’t have the foot traffic inside like the other one as most people who come in stay. There were 4 other people in here with computers, 2 males and 2 females and a few groups of 2 or 3 sitting and talking. It really is a social place to go and a good place to people watch. It was a good time out and I got a lot of stuff done. Now I have heard that the new movie bohemian rhapsody is really good, everyone who has seen it says so. As a matter of fact, I have had a lot of people, friends, co-workers and the like just come up to me out of the blue and ask if I have seen it and tell me how good it is and I have to see it. So, I am thinking I should go and see it and really want to as Susan. I may see if some of my friend want to see it. Over the years I have gone to the movies by myself both as Susan and male mode and I may end up doing that but way more fun to go with someone so if any of my friends read this and want to see this movie let me know. Probably should have put this at the beginning instead of the end but I guess I will see who reads to the end.

Thanks for e=reading and be sure and read my most recent blog to see what is knew.

November 12, 2018 Posted by | Starbucks | , , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Saturday and some Susan time going to the Escape

It is Saturday and yes, I am going to the Escape tonight. Now I have the night free and I am looking forward to a fun night out. I started getting ready early as I wanted some extra time out as Susan. I took my time and was ready about 3:45 and I chose my grey/white dress that is clingy in the right parts and a little thicker so warmer as we are getting into the colder weather. I didn’t get a picture of the dress tonight but found one on an old blog if you want to see what it looks like. Now I was ready but what to do, little early to go to the Escape and really a little over dressed for Starbuck’s. I decided to go to the cemetery and visit my Dad, this will be the second time Susan, the daughter he never knew visits him. The Cemetery is only about 15 minutes south of the Escape so I figured that would be perfect. There was a little traffic but I got there about 4:15, now I figured they would not be that busy as they close at 5 but there were actually a lot of people there, I forgo this is Veteran’s Day Weekend. I want to thank all the Veteran’s, past, present and future who have served and gave so much for the freedoms we have. Tomorrow, Sunday November 11th is the 100th anniversary of the end of WWI, the 11th day of the 11th month at the 11th hour a very special date and time.

Well as I said it was a little busy but my Dad is in a newer section so where I was, I was the only one but I could see probably 20 other people in the nearby sections, really not that far as they are divided by walk ways. This is a huge cemetery as it covers 270 acres Now this is the 4th time I have been here twice as Susan and twice as my male self and I always notice dear tracks. Turns out they come in and eat the flowers people leave and they must be use to people here as they seem to not be bothered by people here. Here are a couple pictures of the section opposite of where I am and you can see the dear and someone at a gravesite on the left and the dear are between them and their car. It really is beautiful here. My dad loved the outdoors, fishing and hunting and I know he would love the fact the dear are here around him.

I stayed here for about 20 to 30 minutes and it is fitting I was here on this weekend as my dad and mom are both veteran’s. It is still hard as I miss him even though I know he is in a better place. It really hits home when there is something we use to do together. I wonder what he would think of this side of me, I really am the same person, I mean I think, act and treat people the same. Now when I left there were several people in the next section over near the walkway and I even passed two woman on the walkway as they were going in as I was going to my car. Now I will admit I was probably the only one here in a dress and heels but with my wrap on most probably wouldn’t have noticed, by the way heels on grass in a cemetery is a little tricky. I did take a couple selfies here as I wanted something to remember this by. This is not the best picture but it has my Dad’s head stone by my left shoulder. It was about 4:45 when I left the Cemetery and headed for the Escape.

I am not sure how many from our group will be at the Escape tonight but I am looking forward to being around people and having a good time. I got to the Escape and it was pretty busy, only one parking spot on the curb so I took it and went in. the big table we normally get was open so I sat down and got out my computer and then went and orered some food. It was just a little after 5 and I figured if anyone from my group showed up it would be at least 7 so I had a couple hours to kill and I knew just how, I still needed to write my blog from Thursday when I had dinner with Julie, so much fun and such a great friend, she really is just like family to me. I spent about an hour writing the blog whie eating and also watching the Oregon Duck’s football game. It was fun and relaxing and it was nice to have the people around me although most were at the bar. I also spent some tie catching up on e-mails and what some of my friends are doing on Facebook. Now I will say I have snoozed people on Facebook for 30 days which I found out you can do. I do not want to see nasty things about one side or the other on the political spectrume. I don’t mind post of what you believe or feel is right but I do not want the name calling or demanizing the other side as I feel this only makes it worse and devides our country even more. We all see the post about bulling kids in schools or online and I feel this is the same thing and I don’t want to be a part of it, I love all my friends regaurdless of who youu voted for and so in showing respect for all of you this is my way.

It was about 7 when Bobbie showed up so at least one other was here. I finished up what I was doing on my computer or more like my computer finished up as my battery went dead about 7:30. I use to get about 5 hours on my battery but tonight only a little over 2 but I am thinking it was because my computer was cold as I kept it in the trunk till I got to the Escape and it was kind of cold out tonight. Bobbie and I talked a little but we were both watching the football game. It was also getting busier as a couple groups of people came in. it is nice gettng here early and having some me time and also gives me a chance to get a table.

A little afterv8 Jan and Lynn showed up so there were 4 of us. It was so ood to see them again as I was looking forward to talking to them about the cruise. Jan bought a new wedding ring for Jan and one day on the cruise she rented a tux and surprised her by proposing again and I think they renewed their wedding vows, how special is that. Lynn was so happy with her ring and we talked about it for a while and I forgot to ask about if they did renew their vows. By the way Lynn knows both my parents and has for years, kind of a funny little side story of Susans life. It really is a small world when you tthink of it. Lynn and I discovered this probably 6 years ago give or take a year. I really am sad I missed the cruise but there was just now way this year. I am hoping the group will do it again in a coupe years.

At 9 Karaoke started and it is always fun although very hard to talk as it gets loud. Now a lot of the songs that were sung including the first 5 or 6 I have never heard before so either they are obscure songs or newer ones as I listen to the oldies station on the radio, oldies as in the 80’s, I rmember when oldies were 60’s. now 2 woman came over and told me how pretty I was and one of them really liked my dress which is a cute look be sure and check out my old blog to see the picture but remember tonight I have my corset on so I have more curves then in the picture in the old blog. I really do love it when people tell me I am pretty or they like my dress or makeup, it just makes you feel good. Laurie showed up a little after 10 and it was good to see her again, she usually gets her later and I remember the days I always went out afetr 9 or 10. I did get one selfie here at the Escape. Well I got two but one was with anoher lady and I forgot to ask if I could post the picture. I had noticed her all night trying to take selfies with her friends and struggling to hold the camera and push the button so I showed her my trick. Set yur self timer for 2 seconds and that way you can push the button and then hold it out to get the picture plus this way those in the picture can see the screen timer and know when the picture will be taken

It was a little after midnight when I left for home. It was a wonderul night out and the time at the cemetery was special. I really do like going there as Susan as in a way my dad finally knows his daughter. Thanbks for reading and be sure and check out my most rescent blog to see what is new in my life.


November 11, 2018 Posted by | Escape Bar & Grill, family, Out and about as Susan, Willamette National Cemetary | , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Thursday night dinner at Roots

Okay it is Thursday and I am going out for dinner. I wasn’t able to make the Wednesday night dinner this week so I had texted Julie to see if she wanted to get together on another night and she had Thursday free so wee decided to go to dinner. Now the plan is for me to pick her up at 6:30 and have dinner at 7, Julie picked the place and made reservations. She picked Roots restaurant and bar in Camas WA. Now I have never herd of this place so it would be a totally new place for Susan to go which is always fun.

I got home about 4:30 so I started getting ready right away as I am a little out of practice as far as getting ready on a schedule, the good thing is I had picked out my outfit last night and new just how I wanted to do my makeup. Now I say this as there is a lot that goes into being female and it is easy to overlook something, Last Saturday when I got home from being out and was getting ready for bed, I noticed I had forgot to do my eyebrows, not a big thing but noticeable if you are looking closely. Sunday when I went to Starbucks, I made one last look before leaving home and sure enough I had forgot my eyebrows again so I quickly did them and then was out the door. When I got to Starbucks, I noticed I had forgot my ring and bracelets. Now as a male I don’t wear any jewelry not even a watch so it should be no big deal but I was aware I was missing it the whole time I was out. So tonight, I took a good look before I left to make sure every thing was right and I looked my best. It was about 5:45 when I left for Julie’s.

I got to Julie’s a little after 6 and she had just finished getting ready so we had about a half hour before we had to leave so we sat and talked and I got to hear all about the cruise and see the pictures and there were some really good pictures, I am so sad I missed it. It was so wonderful to see Julie as she is one of my best friends, her and Cassandra are more like family, Sisters. They had such a wonderful time on the cruise. Julie and Cassandra were girls from the time they left all the way till the flight home and Julie had red nails the whole time and loved it.

Soon it was time to leave for dinner and we got to the Restaurant just a few minutes before 7 and went in. now for Julie this was also a first as her and her girlfriend come here several times a year as her male self but Julie acted as if it was totally normal. It really is hard to go places as your female self that you also go as male if you are keeping the two separate. Now this is a really nice place and more on the high end but very elegant. Our waiter was wonderful and gave us time to talk before we ordered. We had a wonderful time talking. Finally, we ordered, Julie and I split an entrée and appetizer.

We had a wonderful dinner just two girlfriends out for a relaxing time. We talked more about the cruise and of course Diva Las Vegas which is lees than 5 months away (end of March) hard to believe how fast it is coming. We also talked about our group. Our food was wonderful a really nice place so I would recommend it but be prepared to spend some money but once in a great while it is worth it to treat yourself. Now I did get a quick selfie but I really wish I had gotten a picture with Julie.

Soon it was after 9 the night went by so fast, we were the last two in the restaurant as they close at 9 but they never said a thing as we sat and talked. It was about 9:20 when we left such a fun night. Thanks Julie it was a blast. I drove back to Julies and dropped her off before heading for home. Now I love my Susan time at Starbucks but so much more fun when you can go out with someone else. It was a little after 10 when I got home so not to late even though I get up early for work but it was so worth it as I have really missed spending time with my friends the last few months.

I am so looking forward to going out more and getting Susan back to a more normal part of my life. Be sure and ready my newest blog to see what is new in my life.

November 10, 2018 Posted by | Dinner out, family | , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

A little Sunday Susan time

It is Sunday and I have a little time for Susan. I really have no plans other than being my female self for a few hours. I took my time getting ready as I really do enjoy it and find it so relaxing. I was ready by 4 and on my way. I went to the Starbucks I have been going to as it is open till 8:30. I got there and they were a little busy. I went and ordered my drink and then sat down and got my computer out to work on my blog from Saturday night which was so much fun.

Now I finished my blog and caught up on some work. Yes, I can’t go to work as Susan as I still keep this part of my life private but I am able to do work on my computer as Susan something 10 years ago I would never have ever thought possible. Now as I said I still keep Susan private but I am not hiding her away and by that I mean I go where and when I want as Susan and if someone finds out so be it, I am just not going out and telling people unlike 10 years ago when I would not leave home till it was dark and I couldn’t see anyone outside and would never go someplace close to where I live. The first Starbucks I started going to was at least 15 miles away and would take me almost a half hour to get there. It really is wonderful now that I go out as Susan as much as I do.

Now when I am out as Susan, I really am not thinking I am out as a female I am out as myself. No don’t get me wrong I am aware of being Susan when I see my nails or my hair falls in front of my face but I am not focused on it, I am focused on what I am doing and why I am out. It really is a wonderful feeling. Now I stayed here at Starbucks till a little after 8 before leaving. I made a quick stop to fill up my car with gas before going to Subway to get something to eat. It was a short night out as far as what I did but still fun and so worth it.

Thanks for reading and be sure and read my most recent blog to find out what is new in my life.

November 7, 2018 Posted by | Starbucks | , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Finally, a Saturday night out.

It is Saturday and I am going out finally with my friends. My plan was to go to the Escape around 6 as I use to so I posted that in our group to see if other would show up. I was really looking forward to it. I got a message from Barb, her and Melissa were thinking of going to dinner Saturday evening and wanted to know if I wanted to join them, they were going to Full Moon Thai Restaurant at 6:30. Now I am not a fan of Thai food, well I really haven’t eaten it before as I am not a spicy food type girl but I looked at there menu online and saw some things I thought I would like so I told them I would join them. Now I really like these dinners we have as it been normally a smaller group and easier to talk between us, plus it is a little quieter. I will include a few selfie’s I took tonight.

Now I have been going out a little close to home and that really is a lot different as it is on my time schedule, in other words when I am ready and get there. It has been almost two months since I went out and met my friends, Cassandra & Peggy for dinner at Mother’s Bistro. So yes, tonight I was running late as it took longer for me to get ready. I knew Barb was going to be there early so my plan was to be there by 6 or shortly after. I started getting ready at 4 and it took longer than I planned as it was 6 by the time I was ready to leave but it was okay as by my GPS it is only 20 minutes. Well there was all kinds of traffic and I was gong slow on the freeway, at times I think it would have been quicker to walk even in my heels. At one point we came to a complete stop so I texted Barb I would be late. Things started to move again and I thought I would be okay till I got to my exit. It took me 15 minutes to get off the freeway, turns out there was a blazer game tonight and it was the exit I needed. I got to the restaurant at 6:50 and was lucky to find a parking spot just around the corner.

I went in and I was the last to make it, Keren was there with her niece, Melissa and her wife, Barb, Kris and finally me. It was so wonderful to see them all again, I can’t tell you how much I have missed my friends. We chatted for a bit before we ordered and it was so nice. It really was so wonderful and great to see Keren again as she doesn’t get out much and I got to meet her Niece who is transitioning now. We had a wonderful meal and what I ordered was really good so I would recommend Full Moon Thai, the staff was also wonderful. Now as I got there late we were a little later here than I had figured as I had posted I would be at the Escape between 8 and 9 and it was about 9 when we left here. Luckily it is only about 10 minutes or less to get to the Escape from here so I got to the Escape a little after 9. Of course, there were no parking spots in the lot so it would be street parking tonight but as I has a small car I found a spot just a couple cars up from the Escape.

I got inside and Babbie was there and so was Kris, Barb showed up right after I did. The Escape war really busy and we only had half the long table we normally have but that was okay. Lura M and her girlfriend, Laura H and Max were there but they were in the other side talking. Now the Escape is a really fun place to go and the people there are wonderful and so accepting. Now tonight I had worn my little black dress which is clingy and tight and of course I had my corset under it so I really did have a nice figure tonight. A couple of the ladies here came over to tell me how pretty I looked which I always love to hear. Karaoke was going so it was kind of hard to hear when you were talking, one of the reasons I like to get here early.

When Laurie showed up, it was nice to see her again. Laura H & Laura M each sang tonight and of course they stopped by my table and we talked a little Laura H and Max got married last month so we talked about that some of course I have been following in that on her Facebook page. To my friends on Facebook, I love you all but I really want to hear about you and your life on Facebook not political stuff. Trust me, nothing you post on Facebook about the other side what ever side you are on is going to change the mind of someone on the other side. All it does is divide. It perpetuates the division and hate. I am sure if you have at least 100 friends some of them voted for the other person. I value all my friends and I accept we will not always agree on politics or religion but I will not let that come between us. As a matter of fact, at Dinner one of the girls brought up politics and I have gotten so good at this as I immediately showed Melissa my nails as I have gone back to the way I was doing them which is in my nail blog, and the conversation changed that quick. Girls it is so easy to say something without intending to offend someone as we assume everyone believes the same as we do, I think social media is the reason. Well enough of this topic and back to tonight.

One of the ladies here who always sings and I don’t think I have ever seen her here without a smile on her face got up to sing, her name is Melissa and she is really nice. A tip ladies, smile everyone looks so much better with a smile on their face. Your makeup can be perfect, your outfit perfect but a smile brings it all together. After her song she came by and said hi to me as she usually does, she had notice I had not been here for a while which really made me feel good. Well she sat down for a while and we talked. Turns out she works about a mile from where I live and at a place I have gone as my male self although it is a big place and the area she works is not the part I was in. well we talked a little longer and she asked the question all ladies hate; how old I was. I just smiled and told her older then she was at which she replied she didn’t think so as people always guess her age lower but I was still pretty sure of myself so I told her I would bet her, of course there was nothing to the bet. Turns out she is 44 so she was right as I was thinking she was in her late 30’s. well of course I won the bet as she was shocked when I told her I was 54. I guess makeup really does hide your age, that and a daily moisturizer. We talked for probably 30 minutes which was nice as up to now our conversations have been just a few minutes. I really like to get to know people better.

Now it was after 11 which is the time I leave by if not earlier but tonight we set the clocks back an hour so I get an extra hour so I was not in a hurry to leave. It was about 11:30 when Lee showed up. She joined our group and I met her I think in the early spring and she has come a long way in that time. Most of her neighbors know and even some of her co-workers, as a matter of fact she showed up here tonight with one of her co-workers, Mandie who I have met before and is really nice and one of Mandie’s friends, Marty. Both these ladies are awesome and supportive of Lee which is wonderful. It was so nice to see her again and talk with her and her friends. I had a wonderful talking with them. I lost all track of time and before I knew it, it was after 1 am, I think this is the latest Susan has been out in years but it was such a wonderful night.

I finally called it a night and said my goodbyes before leaving. By the time I got home and got in bed my clock which I had already set back an hour said 1:05 am so I really did make it till 2 am, I am so thankful for the extra hour tonight. Sorry this blog was a little longer than normal but I was just so happy to be out I didn’t want to leave anything out. That being said there were 4 men her at the Escape tonight with nail polish on, black but still polish and 3 of them had acrylic nails nicely shaped and a little long. I would love to see more men with nice nails and maybe some reds or pinks.

Thanks for reading and be sure to check out my most recent blog as I am hoping to get out more often.

November 4, 2018 Posted by | Dinner out, Escape Bar & Grill, Out and about as Susan | , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments