Susanmillers Blog

My life as a heterosexual crossdresser.

Sunday and a typical Fall Day for Susan on Columbus Day weekend.

Happy Columbus Day Weekend

Well it is Sunday of Columbus Day weekend and a typical Fall Day, overcast with intermittent showers and windy and the leaves are blowing off the tree. It really is a beautiful time of year and my male self loves this Susan not so wild about the wind. By the way if you are wondering about the orange font, I am using it is because it is fall and Halloween is coming. Now I had some stuff to do so once again it was about 1pm when I started getting ready as Susan. now I have no plans so I took my time getting ready, it is such a relaxing time doing my makeup and transforming myself to Susan. I tried a different eyebrow look a little more straight then arched and a raisin-colored lipstick. As I was looking for something to wear, I came across another casual dress I had forgotten about so that was my choice for the day.

It was a little before 3 when I was already, now I had parked in my driveway and it was really raining at this point so I got a few pictures as I waited for the rain to let up. It is funny as years ago I would wait for none of my neighbors to be out before leaving my garage and now my car is in the driveway and I am waiting on the rain. I only had to wait a few minutes till it slowed down unlike years ago when I could wait an hour or more for all my neighbors to go inside. I quickly walked out to my car and was on my way, yes, I figured I would just go to Starbucks and work on Yesterday’s blog.

It only took a few minutes to get to Starbucks and it had stopped raining but was still windy out and no one was sitting outside and there were quiet a few cars in the parking lot. I walked in and they were busy, the 4 big tables down the middle were all taken by groups of 3 or 4, 2 sitting at the counter along the front window, an older couple at the back table and 2 young girls in the big chairs in the corner and the 6 small tables along the window where I like to sit only 1 was open, it is probably the busiest I have seen it here at least in a long time. now there were 2 people waiting for their order and 2 in line to order so I didn’t take a chance and set my computer on the one table and then went and stood in line to order. Now it looked like most or the young people were doing schoolwork and the older ones just socializing. I got my drink and sat down to work on my computer. Now the bad thing is the wind was blowing in such a way that every time the front door opened you could feel it blow in. now it is more fun here when it is busy as I enjoy being around other people even if just sitting there on my computer.

Now around 5 some of the people left so it was more like normal. It was nice though as I could watch the trees blowing in the wind and the rain come down through the windows. There is something about watching the rain that is calming. Now I did text Cassandra to see how she was doing and I ended up calling her and we talked for a while, I did step outside one the side of the building away from the wind as I don’t like to be on my phone in public, I think it is rude to the people around, again my feeling and not picking on anyone who does that. We talked for a little bit about our upcoming trip and it turns out there is a small chance Cassandra will have to cancel her trip which would be sad, she has a lot going on right now and I know how that goes so there is a slim chance I will be driving to Las Vegas by myself which I have done once before. Now time wise I can make it work as I could leave on Sunday and drive to Reno before going on to Las Vegas the trip hoe would be a little harder as we leave Las Vegas on Tuesday and I have Wednesday off but that is the day I will have my acrylic nails removed so I would have to make sure I got back to Vancouver early enough for that. But I may come back on Friday though and skip the Halloween weekend as it would save me more than half on my hotel cost. Well enough of that I am going to stay positive that Cassandra will make be able to go. If all goes right 2 weeks from tonight, I will be at Cassandra’s house so we can leave early Monday morning.

Now I stayed here till about 6pm when the sky started getting really dark and it looked like it was really going to rain. I decided to just hit McDonalds on the way home in hopes of beating the rain. I went through the drive through and got my food and was about halfway home when it started to poor down rain, I actually had to slow down on the drive home. I got

home and ate dinner and then tried to get a few pictures of my outfit for the day, I have a hard time getting a good picture like this. I spent the rest of the night just watching TV till bedtime.

Now I am looing forward to Monday nights zoom meeting and Wednesday nights dinner. Next weekend I will be picking out what outfits I want to take to

Las Vegas and getting ready.

Stay safe and be happy, thanks for reading my blog and be sure and read my most recent blog to see what is new in my life

October 12, 2021 Posted by | Susan Time | , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Saturday Susan time

Now it is a Holiday weekend as Monday is Columbus Day, I have to work but I still want to wish everyone a Happy Holiday as I know some people get it off.

It is Saturday and yes, I get to spend most of the day as Susan, I did have a few things to do early in the day so I didn’t start getting ready till about 12:30, now I did take my time as I wanted to relax and enjoy my time getting ready, I also wanted to try a new eye look makeup look. I watch a lot of videos on makeup great way to learn and one that caught my eye was a smokey look with blacks and grey. Now I had to fudge a little as my grey was darker so I used my silver on the inner corner of my eye, black on the outer corner and the darker grey above all that faded out to the eyebrow. In all I was happy with the look as I usually can’t get the black shadow to blend right. It was about 2pm when I was already so I got a few pictures and then I was off walking out my front door to my car as I needed to do some grocery shopping and that means a trip to Walmart.

I got to Walmart and went in and got a cart, yes, I have a few more things to get today, I spent about 30 minutes here shopping, yes, I probably could have done it faster, my male self would have but I was just enjoying being out as Susan. I paid for my groceries and then drove back home. I once again parked in the driveway and took 2 trips bringing in my stuff to put away. It may sound silly but doing things like this helps make Susan feel a real part of who I am. For many years Susan was just in the house and then just a special night out to an LGBQ bar and even our Wednesday night dinners which I truly love but it is a special outing with other transgender people. There is just something about doing something so common and everyday type things like grocery shopping that is special to me and I can’t explain it any better than that.

It was almost 3:30 now and I still had the rest of the day and as it is supposed to rain tomorrow, I did want to go put flowers on my parents grave, this has also become a Susan thing. I never shared this side of me with them when they were alive but some how this seems right. Of course that would mean a stop at the Fred Meyers at Johnson Creek to get the flowers. I grabbed my computer and walked out to my car to leave, as I pulled out of my driveway the neighbor man was out working in his driveway. He waved at me so I waved back and drove off, now it is his wife who knows about me so I am 99.99% sure he does also. I got there just before 4 and went in and got a couple small bouquets and paid for them and was on my way. I got to the cemetery a little after 4 and there were 3 other groups well couples in the same section, I was going to visiting their loved ones. Now I didn’t have to walk past any of them but there was one couple probably 100 feet from where I was going but I really didn’t care. I went and put the flowers on their grave and spent about 20 minutes here, probably should have brought a coat as it was just a little chilly out. I did get a couple pictures as I always do, again this is another one of those everyday type things people do. It really is hard to believe it has been 4 months since my mom passed away and a little over 3 years for my dad. It does get easier but I still think about them every day and that may be my Susan side. Now as I walked back to my car I went by another section and there were 3 deer out there eating the flowers off the grave sites so I don’t think my flowers will last to long. I did get a few pictures with the deer in the background, they are hard to see but one was smaller and may have been a younger deer as it stayed pretty close to the one deer.

I left here and decided to stop at the Starbucks in Orchards on my way home and write my blog from Wednesday nights dinner. I am really trying to get caught up on my blogs. I got there just before 5 and went in. there was one man sitting at a table and 2 ladies waiting for there drinks but really this one is not busy inside as it has a drive through. Now as I said it was a little chilly at the Cemetery so I got a hot chocolate and sat down to work on my blog. Well I got thinking about how I have grown as Susan and the wonderful friends I have made over the years so I sent out a few e-mails to people I have not herd from in a while. One was Alice she really was my first friend as I met her one of the first few times I went out and we exchanged e-mail addresses so she would always e-mail me when she came to town and I would meet her at Embers, she really did help me become more comfortable going out. now she was also older than me by quite a bit and the reason I am telling this is her e-mail bounced back as undeliverable as the account has been closed and this was my only way to contact her, it just makes me wonder. Here is a blog from 2008 when I was out with Alice with a picture of us. I wrote my blog and just played on the internet for a while. It was about 7 when I left Starbucks.

I went home to make dinner yes it will be a late one so just making something light, a little salad and a bratwurst and some corn as I didn’t want fast food. The rest of the night I will just watch TV till bedtime as I look forward till tomorrow. Now on a side note Diva Las Vegas is 2 weeks away, as a matter of fact 2 weeks from today I will have my acrylic nails for my Vegas trip and I am so looking forward to it.

Be happy with who you are and thanks for reading my blog and be sure and read my most recent blog to see what is new in my life.


October 11, 2021 Posted by | crossdress, Starbucks, Susan Time | , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Saturday Susan time and a drive along the beach

It is the first Saturday of October and I am looking forward to a full day as Susan. now part of today is to do a full makeup in the morning and see how it holds up all day to get ready for my drive to Las Vegas. Now when I planned this the weather this weekend was supposed to be showers s I figured it would not be that busy at the beach, well that changed and it is sunny and should be around 70. I got up at 7 and started getting ready my goal was a nice daytime look, I used browns for my eye shadow and yes, I did false eye lashes to set them off and I was really happy with the look. My plan was to drive to Astoria Oregon, then Seaside, down to Lincoln City and then back home. In all about 300 miles and 6 hours or driving plus stops. I was ready to leave by 8:30, I got a few pictures and was on my way.

I got to Astoria and looked for a Starbucks to writ my blog from last Monday but the only 2 were little ones in Fred Meyers and Safeway so I drove on to Seaside as they have a stand alone one. I got there about 10:45 and got a couple pictures in my car, one showing my eye shadow which I think turned out well. I went in they were not real busy so I got a hot chocolate and a muffin and spent about an hour doing my blog. I left here and drove on into Seaside towards the beach and again traffic was bad mostly because of all the people out walking and crossing the streets, like last time I was not going to get close to the beach so I got back on Hwy 101 and drove down to Cannon beach to see if it was any less crowded. I got to Cannon Beach and drove into town and the same thing, traffic barely moving and people every where walking around, looked like the Las Vegas strip with all the people so I figured it would just be a drive today. I figured I would drive on down the coast and see if I could get some pictures from the overlooks. As I was driving out of town, I saw people taking pictures in front of an Elk and wondered why they didn’t get closer till I saw it move. Actually there were 4 Elk walking around one of the parking lots eating on the flowers and shrubs and really only moved if people got to close to them and then it was just to move a little bit.

I got back on Hwy 101 and stopped at several overlooks of the ocean and yes at some I got some pictures. It is funny as I had no trouble getting out and looking around but with people there, I didn’t want to take selfies in front of the people. A few of the overlooks weren’t too busy and I did get some pictures. Now if you have never driven this it is a beautiful drive and I would recommend driving north to south as the ocean is on the right and easier to pull off into the overlooks, it is really worth the trip. Now as I went south it did get a little warmer about 72 but the further south, I went the more windy it got. Some of the pictures my hair was really blowing so I am skipping those pictures from the blog. Now I really didn’t notice anyone really watching me but then I really wasn’t paying any attention to them either.

It was a little after 4 when I got to Lincoln city and it was really windy here, all the woman walking around their hair was flying so I drove just a little further south and decided it was time for something to eat. I drove back to Pign Pancake which is where I had breakfast last time I came here in March of this year. I went in and they weren’t that busy, I was shown to a booth by the window and did get a quick selfie. I looked at the menu and yes, I picked out the country fried steak. Now the waitress who came over to take my order had beautiful French fade acrylic nails and sparkly pink eye shadow. Of course I had to compliment her on her nails as they really were beautiful and of course she thanked me and complimented me on my eye makeup. Now I always worry when I do this as I don’t want it to sound like I am fishing for a compliment. Now again I must have timed it right as I had been here about 15 minutes and people started coming in, I guess it is about 4:30 when people start going out for dinner.

I had a nice dinner and it was just before 5 when I paid my bill and headed for home. The drive home I came back Hwy 8 by Spirt Mountain casino and I did briefly think about stopping in but figured I will be in Las Vegas in a few weeks so just kept driving. I got home just before 7pm. It was a wonderful day and a nice drive. Now here is a funny fact about going to the coast from my house, it is 90 miles to Astoria going through Longview, 91 miles going to Seaside by Hwy 26 and 106 miles to Lincoln city by way of Hwy 8, really not that far for any of them. It was a good day and when I got home my makeup still looked okay with just a few areas I could fix with my compact powder. I did stay up till a little after 11 before removing my makeup and going to bed this gave me the 15 hours I wanted to see how my makeup would hold up. Now yes if I was going out someplace I would need to redo it but it should be good enough to check into the Flamingo when I get there after the drive. Now I am looking forward to Sunday and a little more Susan time, it will only be late afternoon into the evening probably just a short trip to Starbucks.

Stay safe and be happy with yourself and thanks for reading my blog and be sure to read my most recent blog to see what is new in my life.

October 4, 2021 Posted by | Beach, Susan Time | , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

A little quiet time as Susan on Sunday.

Well it is Sunday and yes, I get a little Susan time today. Now I had no plans for the day other then I wanted to spend part of it as Susan. now according to the weather yesterday it was supposed to start raining this morning and rain through Tuesday. I made myself an early lunch a little after 11 and then started transforming into Susan. I was all ready a little before 1 so I sat down to watch some TV. Last night I recorded the Bionic Woman as it was a 2-part show and I didn’t want to stay up till midnight plus this way I could fast forward through the commercial, amazing as I watched the 2 hours of it in less than 1 ½ hours. It was only about 2:30 now and it actually looked pretty nice out, mid 70’s and partially sunny so I decided enough sitting around my house. I decided to go to the Starbucks right my house for a while and figure out what I would do.

It only took a couple minutes to get to Starbucks and I went in and ordered my drink and of course the one lady greeted me by name. I talked with her for a bit while she made me my drink, turns out she just moved here a couple months ago from the East coast. I got my drink and went and sat out front as I said it is in the mid 70’s and I wanted to enjoy this weather before it is gone for the winter. There were a couple other groups at the tables outside who I think had the same idea. I stayed here till about 4 while I played on my computer and thought about what I wanted to do. Now I had fixed me a big lunch so I wasn’t really hungry but new I had to have something but what. I decided to go to McDonalds but before you say anything my plan was to go through the drive through and then go down to the waterfront and eat at one of the picnic tables along the river and then take a little walk along the river, a good plan.

I went to the McDonalds at Jantzen Beach as from there it is a short drive back across the river to the waterfront. As I was getting my food the wind picked up a little and this was the change. By the time I got back across the river to the waterfront, maybe 5 minutes the wind was really blowing and although it was still 74 out the wind made it feel a lot colder. Now I did have a coat so that was not the problem really it was the wind, it really messes up my hair so in the end I sat in my car and ate my dinner in the parking lot looking out over the river. Not what I had planned but a nice view. You can also guess I did not go for a walk either. There were actually a lot of people out walking but all the women with long hair (and a couple of men) you could really see it blowing in the wind. This is the one time I really wish it was my own hair as wigs do not do well in the wind, but I really like the advantage of changing up my look with different wigs as you can see from my blogs.

It was a little before 5 when I decided to leave the waterfront as it was still really windy and yes, I just decided to go to the other Starbucks by my house and sit inside for a while and work on my blog and send out the information for our Monday night zoom meeting. I went in and yes was greeted by name by the one young man who always seems to be here, you know it really does make you feel good when they remember you. I got my drink and sat down to get some things down on my computer including starting this blog. Now as I sat there a man walked by and said hi and asked me how my day was going and I immediately thought about yesterday at Starbucks. I said hi back and told him it was good and he just moved on and went and sat 4 tables down and that was it. turns out he knows one of the workers here who came out a couple times and talked with him so he was just being nice. Now as I sat here, I did get a call from my brother so I talked to him for a little bit and also got a call from one of my friends and we talked for a little bit, he wants to get together this week which will be fun as we haven’t got together in months, although he doesn’t know about Susan. I stayed here till about 7 before leaving and heading home for the evening as there was a Hallmark movie, I wanted to watch at 8pm. As I said it was a quiet and relaxing day but fun.

Now I am looking forward to Monday’s zoom meeting and Wednesday nights dinner and then next weekend, there is a chance my brother will come to town but if not, it will be a weekend of Susan and on Saturday I am thinking of making a drive to the coast again for the day for 2 reasons, one I just want to go but 2 I want to try an all-day makeup look to see how well it holds up to get ready for our trip to Las Vegas. On October 25th Cassandra and I will drive all the way to Las Vegas, 15 hours in the car and I want to get a look that will still look good enough when we get there to at least go and check into the hotel. Now I know a few of you wonder why I would do such a long trip in a car as Susan, for me it is the experience. When I go to Las Vegas it is my chance to be Susan 24/7 and do the whole trip as Susan. the only thing I will have on this trip that is my male self is my drivers license and a credit card, nothing else from my male side. It really is an experience to do this as I really have no choice but to be Susan on this trip. By the way there is still time to sign up for Diva Las Vegas if you are interested.

Be safe and be happy, thanks for reading my blog and be sure and follow me on my blog.

September 27, 2021 Posted by | Starbucks, Susan Time | , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Wednesday night dinner at Southland Whiskey Kitchen and Sherri’s first time out

Well it is Wednesday night and I get to have dinner with my friends at Southland Whiskey Kitchen, yes we were here just a couple weeks ago but one of our newest members stopped by in male mode to meet us and tonight will be her first time going out as Sherri and she was familiar with this place so I figured it would help make her comfortable. Now originally, I had figured on just 6 but we had a last-minute ad and with 7 I decided to call and make a reservation for 8 just to be safe. Turns out I didn’t need to as they were not busy. I got home about 4:45 and started getting ready as I wanted to be to Julie’s by 6 so we had a little time to sit and talk before leaving I so love this time. now I knew what I was going to wear and how I was going to do my makeup and yes it included the gold eye shadow I bought Monday as Tracy the lady who sold it to me will be there. I did think about the lipstick I got also as it is really a beautiful shade but with eating it will wear off or worse maybe smear which I don’t like so that will be my lipstick probably for our Zoom meetings or if I am not going to eat. Yes, I do not like messy lips. I was all ready by a few minutes after 5:30 and on my way.

I got to Julie’s just before 6 and went in. Julie had just finished dressing and so we sat and talked for about 20 minutes before we left for the restaurant, I really do love picking Julie up as it gives us a great chance to talk plus Julie is just so wonderful to be around as are all my friends really. We got to Southland Whiskey Kitchen at 6:50 and went in and Sherri and Tracy were already there, Yes Sherri’s first time out. it was so wonderful to see them and Sherri looked wonderful and a lot more calm then my first few times out, I sat looking at the table and hardly said a word to the people around me, Tracy looked beautiful too as did all of us. Tracy is a really supportive friend of Sherri and her wife they met here in Portland and she came out to give Sherri some encouragement. Julie and I sat down and Cassandra joined us, seems she had been sitting at the bar waiting for us to arrive. Again I remember the old days when none of us wanted to be the first to arrive. It wasn’t long and Claire showed up, all we were missing was Patty and she showed up just a few minutes past 7 so we all made it. I made sure and introduced everyone to Sherri and Tracy as I wanted them to feel as welcome and comfortable as possible being her first time out. Sherri made a wonderful comment and I think it is worth repeating. She said she walked in as Sherri and the world didn’t end of change and that is so true. We all think that when we go out everyone is watching us, that we are all they are thinking about or talking about and that is just not true. Yes, we may get a look, comment or they may talk briefly about us but then life goes right back on track and they go back to what they were doing.

Our waitress came and took our drink order and it was the same waitress we had a couple weeks ago. Now looking around I am sure they were happy we were here as there were a couple people sitting at the bar and 1 couple at another table and that was it. we all ordered our food and yes, I got the same thing I had last time. I do have my favorites at the places we go and I tend to always order them, I am a girl of habit but I know what I like. Now I was to the middle of the table where I like to sit as I can kind of talk with everyone but I did spend most of the night talking with Sherri and Tracy as I really did want to get to know then better. Sherri lives a few hours away so she will not be a regular at our dinners but I really do hope when she is in town, she will join us. Even if not on a Wednesday night I and I think a few others would be willing to do another night if that was all she had in town yes, we all look for an excuse to enjoy this side of who we are.

Our food came and we had a wonderful meal. It was just such a wonderful night out with friends, new and old. I really think Sherri and Tracy enjoyed themselves at least I hope so. Your first time out is such a big experience and something we all remember. After dinner we sat and talked and just had nice time. it was a little before 9 when Sherri and Tracy’s Uber showed up as that was how they came to avoid parking. It was sad to see them leave but I look forward to seeing them again as they really are wonderful ladies. The rest of us sat and talked till about 9:30 before we left, we were the last ones here. Well it turns out because they are slow, they are closing earlier now and had been closed for a while now but let us sit and talk which was nice although we all felt bad for this. I think they are closing at 8 now which may affect our coming here as we usually do our dinners between 7 & 9. We all thanked them and they told us to be sure and come back. Now I forgot to get pictures and it would have been nice to get a group one, I really hope Sherri got a few of her to remember the night.

We all said our goodbyes and as Claire doesn’t live far from her Julie and I drove her home so we could talk a little more. Now next Wednesday I am not sure we will do a dinner as most of our regular girls will be out of town. We dropped Claire off and Julie and I talked all the way back to Julie’s house where I dropped her off for the night. it was a late night but so worth it. I didn’t get home till after 10:30 which may not seem that late but tomorrow I have to leave for work at 4:55 am which means it will be a short night. now I am looking forward to the weekend and some more Susan time.

Be happy with who you are and don’t let others tell you what you should be or how you should act. Thanks for reading my blog and sharing this part of my life with me.

September 12, 2021 Posted by | Dinner out, Susan Time | , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Saturday and a day of Susan

Well it is Saturday and I get some Susan time. Now normally I take care of things in the morning and spend the afternoon & evening as Susan but tomorrow I am going Golfing with Julie, Cassandra and another girl but in boy mode so when I got up this morning, I wanted a little more time today. Now I do have a 9am zoom meeting with people who know nothing of Susan but I can keep my video off for that so not a problem so when I got up, I decided to start getting ready. Now time was short and I wanted to take my time and enjoy myself getting ready so before the meeting I just had time to do my eye makeup, brows, eye shadow, liner and mascara the rest I would finish after the meeting yes, I went for a more dramatic eye look today. The meeting only lasted 45 minutes and with the hardest part of my makeup done it didn’t take long to finish my foundation, contouring and lips and I was ready by 11:20 so now what to do with the day. I am behind on my blogs again and so I decided to go to Starbuck and write my Monday night blog, do my weekly shopping and later in the day go back to Starbucks and write my blog from Wednesday nights dinner at Southland Whiskey Kitchen but I wanted a full day.

I decided to start at the Starbuck’s in Orchards as that is close to the Fred Meyers I want to go to. I got my computer and was off and got to the Starbucks a little after 11:30. Now this Starbucks has a drive through so they generally are not that busy inside but that was not the case today. When I pulled up there was a family of 4 at one of the outside tables, 3 women at another one and 2 still open and I thought it might be a little cool to sit outside as it was only 69 out but no wind. I went inside to order my drink and there were people at 6 of the tables inside and a couple people either ordering or waiting for drinks. I got in line and one of the ladies behind the counter greeted me by name, which was nice, I have come here before but not as often as the one by my house. I ordered a hot chocolate and as I stood there waiting a young girl probably 12 to 15 years old said hi to me so I said hi back, well she came closer and asked me where I got my bracelet which caught me off guard as it is a really basic style and not very fancy so I told her Charming Charlies which is where I think I got it but I have had it for several years so wasn’t 100% sure. Well we talked a little till she got her drinks. She went outside and joined her friend at the 3rd table. Now as I waited for my hot chocolate, I realized it was actually colder inside with their air conditioning going then outside so I decided to go to the table outside between the 3 ladies and the 2 young girls of which one I had been talking to. It actually was pretty nice sitting outside.

I wrote my blog from last Mondays Zoom meeting and posted it online and just had a relaxing time. after about 30 minutes the 3 ladies next to me left which opened that table for a while. A little while later a man on a motorcycle arrived and got a drink and sat down at the table next to me and a few minutes later another man on a motorcycle showed up and joined him so all the tables were full again. The family left and then the 2 young girls did the girls both said by to me. Then the 2 men left and I was all alone outside, yes, I did get a picture. My battery was at half so I decided to go inside for a little while and charge it back up for my next stop. It was about 2 when I left here. I grew up not far from here so I decided to drive by my old house from High school before going to the store to do shopping.

I drove to my old house and it was disappointing, this was a brand-new neighborhood when we moved into it 45 years ago and now it is run down, the yards are all overgrown and just look bad, all the houses. I almost wished I hadn’t drove by but now the funny thing. Across the street and 2 houses down there was a garage sale, something Susan has never done and being as I moved away from here 35 years ago, I decided to stop and check it out. there were only 2 other people looking at stuff plus the couple doing the sale but still fun and they seemed to pay no attention to me and of course I didn’t know them. I was only here less then 10 minutes but still fun. As I walked back to my car, I looked across the street to the house next to the one I grew up in and the man out front was my old neighbor, in high school I used to hang out with his one son as we were he same age and I actually went out on a date with his daughter a few times in high school, she was a year younger than me. Now I new he would never recognize me as I have probably only seen him 2 or 3 times in the last 35 years but still was interesting.

I went to Fred Meyers and did my weekly grocery shopping which really doesn’t take long, actually would be easier to just do it during the week on my way home but it does give me something to do as Susan. I finished my shopping and drove home and just parked in the driveway and took my groceries inside and out them away. It was about 4:30 now so I decided to go to the Starbucks by my house for a while and work on my blog from Wednesday nights dinner at Southland Whiskey Kitchen, of course I wont post that one till tomorrow morning. I got to the Starbucks and they were also busy, 4 small groups outside, 3 small groups inside and one big table with 8 woman and 2 men at it.

I went up to place my order and the one lady said she would be right with me so as I stood there and waited the other lady making drinks said, “Hi Susan are you getting your Kiwi Starfruit refresher today? I can get it started.” I smiled and said I just wanted a sweetened green iced tea and she said it would be right up. I paid for my drink and it was just a few moments later my drink was ready. I went and sat down at a table between 2 men and set up my computer and worked on my blog. Now I kind of lost track of the time and before I new it, it was about 7pm and I still hadn’t eaten dinner yet so I packed up my computer to leave. As I was walking out the lady who made my drink was sitting with a young man and as I walked by she wished me a good night by name which always makes me feel good. Now as it was so late I just made a quick trip though McDonalds drive through before going home for the night, it was a good day and now I am looing forward to Monday night.

Stay safe and be happy with who you are. Thanks for reading my blog and be sure and read my most recent blog to see what is new in my life.

August 23, 2021 Posted by | Starbucks, Susan Time | , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Saturday Susan time, just a relaxing day

Well it is Saturday and that means some Susan time, I had something to do in the morning and I didn’t get home till a little after noon so I made a quick lunch before I started my transformation for the day. My goal was to be ready by 2 or shortly after. Now I did want to try a little different look today so I went with my rose eye shadow and yes, a pink lipstick. I don’t wear this shad often but I was going with my salmon-colored top and I thought it might be a good match. In all I was happy with the look although the lipstick seems brighter in the natural light outside. I really like the reds and not sure if this is a good color for me so feel free to give me some input. Now normally I have been going to the Escape on Saturday evenings so I try to make my look good enough for both but with the new mask mandates in Orgon I decided not to go tonight actually it changed my plans all together. I have been going to the Starbucks at Cascade Station by the airport as it is close to the Escape but also being in Oregon, I didn’t want to deal with the mask so I will be staying in Vancouver.

I was already a little after 2 and yes, I needed to go grocery shopping so that was the first thing on my list. I grabbed my purse and walked out my front door to my car in the driveway. I have been parking there instead of in the garage lately, this is why I am sure most of my neighbors know because as I was getting into my car one of the neighbors from down the street drove by. I drove to Walmart and went in to do some shopping, yes, I have been going here more lately. I did my weekly shopping, only took about 20 minutes as I am just shopping for me now. I paid for my groceries and then back home and yes parked in my driveway and unloaded my groceries into my house just like any of my other neighbors would do. It was a little after 3 now and I need to get my blog from Wednesday night’s dinner written yes, I am having trouble keeping up with them. I decided to go to the Starbucks in Orchards for 2 reasons, first I wanted to swing by the Toyota dealership and get my car washed as when I get my oil changed here, they always give me a few free car washes and it is just down the street from this Starbucks but also on Sunday I will be back at Starbucks again and will go to the one by my house so I didn’t want to go there 2 days in a row.

I got to Toyota and got in line for my car wash, only 1 car in front of me. Now when I get my il changed they give me 3 or 4 stamps on my bill for the car wash and what I have noticed is when I came here as my male self, they always cross off one of the when I do it as Susan, they don’t always cross one off. Well it was my turn and I opened the window to hand him my bill with the stamp, he just looked at it and said I was good. now I don’t know if this is because I am Transgender or if they do this for females. It was almost 4 when I got to Starbucks and went in and there were only 4 people inside and both were 2 groups of men, unlike the one at Cascade Station which has a lot more females there.

I ordered my drink and set up my computer on the table. I kind of glanced at the men out of the corner of my eye and nothing either they didn’t notice me or just didn’t care. I got my drink and started working on my blog. Now as I said I am behind on them and part is just finding the time but also, I really like writing my blog when I am Susan. It just seems more real to be writing about my time as Susan when I am in fact Susan. I worked on my blog and also checked my e-mails. We had a new girl trying to join the group and she was having trouble. So we exchanged some e-mails and I helped her out. I finished my blog but will wait to post it till Sunday Morning as I already posted one just a few hours ago, I try not to post to many in a row as I have a lot of people who get them in e-mails and I don’t want to flood their inbox and I realize 2 in a day is not much but I know I have a few friends on Facebook that it seems they just post a bunch if stuff one right after another and that is all you can see. That is fine but it makes it hard to see what others are doing.

Before I knew it, it was after 6, the time went by really fast so I was thinking about what to do for dinner and although it is not healthy there is a Wendy’s just across the parking lot so I walked over there and got me something to eat and yes sat there and ate it. They were a little busy even inside which surprised me after all being a Saturday night, I figured going out to Wendy’s would not be a big choice. It was about 7 when I finished and normally, I would have been at the Escape but not tonight but I also wasn’t ready to go home and as it was in the low 80’s and looked like the smoke from the fires was clearing out a little I decided to drive down by the waterfront and maybe take a walk if I could find a parking spot.

It only took about 15 minutes to get down there and I easily found a parking spot, yes there were people walking along the water but they were spaced out as I think the smoke has kept people more inside. Now this is the hard part of being Susan, I really didn’t want to carry my purse as I walked as I noticed most of the women didn’t have purses as they walked but my outfit today has no pockets. I made the choice to lock my purse in my trunk and just carry my keys and phone as I needed the phone as I hoped I could get a couple pictures. As much as I like getting selfies, I don’t like doing it where others can see me do it. Well I walked a way down the path and there was a break in the people so I stopped quickly and got a couple of selfies and yes you can see how bright this pink lipstick is in these pictures. I only spent about 30 to 40 minutes here walking before getting back into my car to leave, now I am sure I got some looks as none of the women I passed had lopstick on and most had minimal makeup but some of them also said hi to me as they passed which was nice.

It was about 8:30 when I got back home for the night, the rest of the night I watched a Hall Mark movie, “The 27-hour day” and it was pretty good. It was almost midnight when I went upstairs and washed my makeup off and went to bed. It was a good day and now I am looking forward to Sunday and some more Susan time.

Stay safe and be happy and thanks for reading my blog and be sure and read my most recent blog to see what is new in my life.

August 16, 2021 Posted by | Starbucks, Susan Time | , , , , | Leave a comment

Sunday and some Susan time and a trip to put flowers on my parents graves

Well it is Sunday and I get another day as Susan, now today was hard as I was spending Sundays with my mom till, she passed away in early June but what makes today especially hard is tomorrow would have been her 93rd birthday. Now if you rea my blog from yesterday you saw I went out in the morning as my male self with my pretty red nails, eye makeup and lipstick and so that was the plan again today. I wanted to go to Starbuck’s and see if anyone said anything and today would be the Starbucks at Jantzen Beach. As I took my shower my heat light in the bathroom burned out, it was 29 years old so I guess it was do so I added that to my list to stop at Home Depot and pick one up. I did the same raisin color lipstick and rose-colored eye shadow, now if you look at this picture from later in the day all I did was draw my brows, add some liner, highlighter on the brow bone and add a darker color on the otter edge and take it out to the end of my eyebrow instead of the middle of the arch.

I got to the Starbucks about 8:30 and went in, no mask today to hide my lipstick, now there were all ladies working here and not one comment on my makeup. I posted my blog from Friday manicure and pedicure and worked on my blog from Saturday. I stayed here till about 10:30, I did see a coupe people glance over at me but no hard stares and no comments. I left here and drove around to Home Depot and parked and went in and again no mask, red painted fingernails and toenails, yes, I wore sandals, eye makeup and lipstick. I checked out the light bulb section and no luck so I asked a young man and he said if they had them it would be in the bathroom fixture section so I turned to head that way and about 3 aisle down a guy I worked with for 30+ years walked off the aisle headed right for me, luckily he must have been looking for something as he was looking up at the signs for the aisle so I ducked up and aisle and went to the back aisle and over to the section I needed. Okay this probably wasn’t a good idea going out as my male self this way and will not do it again at least this close to home. Well they didn’t sell just the bulbs so I left hoping I wouldn’t run into him on my way out. I did run over to Lowes and check there also but wore my mask in and no luck they said I would have to order that online. It was almost noon now so I headed for home to transform into Susan. Now as I said above it was easy to transform my eye makeup for Susan but I did remove the lipstick and go with a brighter color for the day. I was really happy with the look I came up with today.

I was all ready by a little after 1 so I grabbed my purse and computer and walked out the front door, yes, I have been parking in the driveway. My neighbor across the street was edging his front yard so I kept my eye on him as I walked to my car but didn’t see him look up. I don’t know if he saw me but I pulled out and drove right by him. My first stop was Fred Meyers in Johnson creek to get flowers and today there was a lit of traffic, it took me almost an hour to get there, only 25 miles. I parked and went in and got my flowers and was on my way. It only took about 10 minutes to get to the cemetery from here.

I parked and got the flowers all ready and walked up to their grave sites, and my mom’s has her head stone now. I placed the flowers and spent some time here today, as I said it was hard as I kept thinking we should be celebrating her birthday. There are still certain things that bring up strong emotions and I imagine that will always be there. Things like Thanksgiving and Christmas, I always had them at my parent’s house and when they went into assisted living then we had them at my house so this year will be really hard when the holidays come around. I spent about 30 minutes at the grave and then went and got my computer and sat on a bench about 150 feet away and started todays blog, I just wanted to spend some time with them. Now they never met Susan and as far as I know they didn’t know about her but I really think they would have accepted her. I seem to come here more as Susan then I do as my male self and I wonder sometimes if that is wrong. I spent about 40 minutes sitting here on my computer before putting it away and walking back to the grave site to say goodbye. Several people walked by me as I say there and most said hi as they passed and as I walked back to my car, I passed a few more people and no one seemed to give me a second look.

Now as I was leaving the cemetery, I heard an ad for batteries plus bulbs so I googled it and there is one only 3 miles away on 82nd avenue so I put it in my GPS and was on my way. I parked and went in and asked if they had the heat lights and the young man said yes and took me right over to where they were so I got my light, if you need one of these this is the place to go. It was a little after 3:30 so I headed for home and as always, I us my GPS and it was strange as it told me to turn just past Carl’s Jr. on Powell, I had never heard it us a landmark like that and sure enough as I got closer it said the same thing again, I wonder if Carl Jr. is paying Google maps for that.

On my way home I stopped for dinner at IHOP by Vancouver mall, I have gone here a few times as Susan over the last year but I picked it as I use to bring my mom here a lot, it was her favorite place to go and I think that was because my dad use to bring her down here for breakfast every other Saturday when they had their condo cleaned. Don’t get me wrong the food is good here at least I like it but today it was more about the memories. Now I know some will say its not good to do this but I really did need this today. I got there a little after 4 and wondered how busy they would be and they weren’t, there was one couple at a table and another couple with a baby and that was it.

The young lady showed me to a booth and as I already knew what I wanted she took my order. She was really pleasant and I got great service, and while I was here 2 more couples came in so there were 5 tables with people at and 4 waitresses. Now another waitress stopped by to say hi as she remembered me from past times when she waited on me. As there were not many people when no one was looking I did get a quick selfie. I had a nice quiet dinner and reflected on the tomes I came here with my mom and yes, my dad. I think memories are good and healthy as long as you don’t just dwell on them. By the way my meal was heathy, roasted chicken breast, steamed broccoli, mashed potatoes and a salad. It was about 4:50 when I paid y bill and left and from here, I went to the Starbucks by my house to finish off my day.

I got to the Starbucks a little after 5 and went in, it was windy outside so I sat inside with the rest of the people, 3 couples at tables and 3 individuals with their computers out. I got my dink and sat down and got my computer out to finish up my blog from today, catch up on some e-mails and just relax and play on my computer. Now one of the things I was doing was checking my blog as it is a great way to look back on things I have done, I would encourage everyone to keep a journal or blog even if private but I noticed going through my stats one blog seems to be really popular and over the last year it is my most read one and actually it is now it is my 2nd most read of all of them, and when you figure I have almost 1,500 blog post I wonder how people find it on a daily basis? The blog is about my first date as Susan, I had met a lady as Susan and we went out for a while and our first date I went back and forth between if I should be Susan or my male self and yes Susan won out. It was a good day although a little emotional. Now as I sat here a couple of the ladies working here left and, on their way, out, they both said bye to me by name which always makes me feel good. I stayed at Starbucks till 7:30 as that is when they close on Sunday Nights and the main reason was, I didn’t want to be at my house today alone as that would have been hard and doing things and being someplace made it easier. I know it will get better as time goes on but every once in awhile there will be things that bring the emotions back.

I got home and washed away Susan and realized I still had to remove my nail polish, I thought about waiting till the morning but didn’t and it was a good thing as red polish is hard to get off especially with 2 coats and a thick topcoat. In the end I got most off but if you looked close you could still see traces of red by the cuticle but it was sad to have to remove it. It was a little after 9:30 when I went to bed.

Now I am looking forward to Monday nights zoom meeting, yes, I remembered this week to send it out on Saturday. It has been a good weekend.

Stay safe and be happy and thanks for reading my blog and be sure and read my most recent blog to see what is new in my life.

August 9, 2021 Posted by | Starbucks, Susan Time | , , , , , | 1 Comment

Wednesday night dinner at Outback Steak house what a wonderful night.

Well it is Wednesday and that means getting together with my friends for dinner which is so fun as we went more than a year without being able to do this. Now tonight will be a lot of fun, Jennifer is the one setting this dinner up and she is bringing family with her. not only her wife but her son and daughter in-law. She told her family about a year ago and it went well and her one daughter in-law and on occasion her son has joined us on our zoom meetings. Well tonight they wanted to go out with her and yes meet some of the girls they have met on the zoom meetings in person so I was really looking forward to this. I love meeting new people but especially none trans people as I think it helps people understand us better.

Now the Outback Steak House is really nice but it is a hard one to judge time getting there, if there is no traffic, I can make it in 25 minutes but if there is traffic it can take well over an hour so when I was almost home, I pulled it up on my GPS and it was saying 1 hour and 20 minutes but it was right in the middle of ush hour. I had texted Julie, I would pick her up by 6 to be sure we had time but there were 2 issues, first I really wanted to look my best tonight as we have a big group and I will be meeting some for the first time but more importantly I didn’t get home till 4:45 so I had limited time as I wanted to leave my house by 5:30. I quickly started getting ready. first up were my eyes, yes, I have started doing all my eye makeup before my foundation, takes just a little longer but I think the look is better. I did my brows and then my eyes, I have been using scotch tape to get the perfect eye shadow look, just like this. Once my shadow was done and my eye liner done it was time for the false eye lashes, yes tonight I would wear them as we talked about them a few weeks back and Jennifer’s daughter in-law was really fascinated by them and wished she could do them so I did want to show off a little bit as I have gotten pretty good at doing them, only takes me a couple minutes now. I finished my makeup with a red lipstick and I was right on time, it was 5:20, a full makeup in 35 minutes and I felt it looked good. I got dressed and was walking out my door just a couple minutes after 5:30.

I got to Julies just before 6 and went in. Julie was already and had on a really cute floral dress. We talked for just a couple minutes and then we were on our way. Things had gotten better and my GPS was only saying 32 minutes and yes once again traffic was easy and we got there about 6:35, we had a wonderful conversation in the car on the way. I so love having Julie ride with me as it just makes it more fun. Funny years ago I would wonder what the people in the other cars thought but I don’t even think about that anymore. About 6:50 we saw Danika and her wife go in so we went in and there were already a couple girls there. Now tonight our group is mostly couples. By a little after 7 all of us were here, Danika & Lorna, Jeanie & Amy, Cindi & Alice, Claire & Eiko, Jennifer & Marry Anne, Driel & Evan, Julie & Trixie (yes Julie’s girlfriend who lives near here joined her), Christy, and me, yes Christy and I were the only non-couples. Now I did sit in the middle of the long table so I could try to talk to everyone but with 16 of us it was hard.

Our waiter came to take our order and it was the same young man we had last time we were her 4 weeks ago and of course he remembers us or at least the ones who were here that night. he took our orders and was really careful to make sure he went in order so he could split the checks correctly, he is really a good waiter. Well we all talked and I talked mostly with those right around me. Now to my left I had Trixie, Julie, Driel, Evan, to my right was Amy, Jeanie, Cindi and the other side of the table across from me was Lorna and looking left from her was Danika, Marry Anne, Jennifer, Christy and looking right from her was Eiko, Claire and Alice so mostly it was Trixie, Marry Anne, Danika, Lorna, Eiko, Claire and Amy I talked with. That is the one bad thing about these big groups.

We had a wonderful dinner and the food was awesome as always. After we finished dour waiter brought our checks and got them all correct as I said he is good. now they were not that busy tonight as a matter of fact I think our group made up almost ½ of the people here. So it was almost 9 when our waiter came back and asked if he could pick up our checks, normally they wait till you leave the table but it was slow and they wanted home to go home as they close at 9. We told him yes but he did tell us to take our time and stay as long as we wanted as they still had to clean up which was nice. Trixie was the first to leave so I moved over 1 seat as I really wanted to talk to Driel more, actually a few of the girls moved around a little especially Cindi as she made sure she talked with everyone. Yes, I talked with Driel a little about makeup especially my eye makeup as I wanted to make sure she noticed my false eye lashes. It is funny as a man I don’t worry or care about what others think or notice about how I look but as Susan it is important and I take pride in it. now we didn’t get any group pictures and with so many significant others I wouldn’t have posted it anyway if we had as I don’t want to make people feel uncomfortable.

It was about 9:20 when a few more of the girls left so we all got up and walked outside and stood around and talked for about 15 more minutes and this was really nice as you could move around and talk more easily. I got a good chance to talk with Driel and Evan which for me was the highlight of the evening as I wanted to make sure they knew how awesome I thought it was that they were supporting of Jennifer. And I git to talk more with Cindi and Allice who I have not seen in years, I think the last time was at one of Cassandra’s parties. And also Claire and her wife Eiko, Claire is our newest member. It was just a wonderful evening all around and so sad to see it coming to an end. I look forward to seeing all these ladies again as they are just such wonderful friends. Well as with all things the evening came to an end and we said our goodbyes and made our ways to our cars, it was almost 10pm by now so it would be a late night but so worth it.

On the drive home Julie and I talked about the evening and what great people were there and yes how lucky Jennifer is to have such a wonderful and accepting sin and daughter in-law, I really do hope they join us for another dinner when they are in town or at least join the zoom meeting. Oh there was one more highlight from the evening. Jennifer’s granddaughter who know about Jennifer and has seen pictures of her wanted to meat her so that also happened before they left to come to the dinner. They actually wanted to try on some of Jennifer’s wigs so Jennifer let them and got a picture with them in her wigs. It was such an adorable picture.

The drive back to Julie’s house passed quick and soon we were there and I was dropping her off, this is when I know my night is really coming to an end as all that is left is my drive home and then the washing away of Susan so I can go to bed, this is really a das point. Now I don’t want to transition or be full time 100% of the time but I also realize how much Susan is a big part of my life and wish she was more then a couple evening a week and weekends and by this, I mean maybe several days of Susan before going back to my male side. These are just shot times so it still seems like she is limited in my life and of course being able to have long acrylic nails for a week or 2 at a time.

Well I got home and yes cleaned up and went back to my male self but I am looking forward to the weekend and being Susan again, I don’t have anything really planned but I do know I need a pedicure badly so that will happen. I just have to decide if I will go Saturday and get it as Susan at Dream nails which would be awesome or stop Friday in my way home as my male self and go to Julie’s Nails and spa, both are awesome and I would recommend them both. I have gone to both many time, Dream nails always as Susan and Julie’s nails always as my male self. I am leaning more to Julie’s for the simple reason going on Friday night I might just get a manicure and get my fingernails painted for the weekend also.

Well stay safe and be happy the key to life is find what makes you happy, be it something you do, something you like or a person. Life is too short to be unhappy. Thanks for reading my blog and be sure and read my most recent blog to see what is new in my life.

August 7, 2021 Posted by | Dinner out, friends, Susan Time | , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Sunday and a little Susan time at Starbuck’s

Well it is a beautiful Sunday and I get some Susan time. yes, I basically get 4 partial days a week right now, Monday evening for our Zoom meeting, Wednesday evening for dinner, Saturday afternoon and evening and Sunday afternoon and evening. Yes, I do have a lot more time on my hands now and I am trying to fill it and take my mind off my mom’s passing away. Some is yard work something I have wanted to do for a few years and hadn’t gotten to and yes Susan time as it relaxes me and takes my mind off of things in my life.

It was about 1pm when I started getting ready and yes today, I did a little different look, the purple eye shadow and a bright red lipstick. My plans were simple a drive along the river, Starbuck’s and maybe stopping and getting dinner so I figured I would rock the bright red lopstick today. I was already a little after 2 and walked out to my car and was on my way. I drove up to Beacon Rock state park just to check things out, this was one of my favorite places to go hiking years ago, my friends and I would go here a few times a year although I haven’t been up here in probably 10 years. It is nice as it is only about 50 minutes from my house. Now I didn’t get out of my car as in Washington you need a permit to park at a state park or pay for it and as I was just here to check it out, I figured it wasn’t worth it after all this was just to take a drive. I left here and was planning on going to Starbuck’s from here and decided to go to the one at Cascade station as it is on my way home but mostly it is because they have a lot of outside tables, 3 out front and 10 on the side patio which I like as it is almost always out of the sine and sun so very pleasant to sit outside.

I got there just before 4 and parked out front, 2 of the 3 tables by the door were taken and at least half the tables on the patio, today must have been lady’s day. There was 1 man by himself, 3 couples and the rest were ladies, by themselves or in groups and the ages were from probably high school to seniors. I got my computer and went in, this one does not have a drive through so they are always busy inside so I had to stand in line behind 3 other small groups and thinking I hope they don’t take the table I want outside, there is 2 right outside the door on the patio so in the shade of the building instead of under an umbrella. I got my drink and the table was still open so I set my computer up and got a couple pictures at the table when I felt no one was looking.

Now this is on a busy street and there is a lot of shopping here so lots of people walk by and yes, a lot of people go in and get a drink, this is a real busy Starbucks so good for people watching. I started off by finishing my blog from yesterday and got it posted. I also took some time and caught up on some e-mails, it was just a relaxing afternoon. I stayed here a couple hours till a little after 6 before I got hungry and decided to walk over to Panda Express which is just across the driveway and they have an outside eating area also although most are in the sunshine. They were also busy so I walked in and waited in line. I got my food and went outside and there were still a few tables and one was partially behind a tree so I sat at that table and was mostly in the shade. I sat and had a nice dinner, now again years ago when I first started going out, I would never have thought of sitting outside in full view of everyone but now I don’t even think about it.

It was about 6:30 when I finished and walked back down the street to my car. It was a wonderful day. I got home about 7 and watched a Christmas movie I taped off Hallmark today, A Nashville Christmas Carol, yes, I am watching Christmas movies again. Now I am looking forward to Monday nights Zoom meeting and this Wednesday’s dinner. Stay safe and be happy with yourself and find what makes you happy.

Thanks for reading my blog and be sure and read my most recent blog to see what is new in my life.

July 12, 2021 Posted by | Starbucks, Susan Time | , , , , | 2 Comments

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