Susanmillers Blog

My life as a heterosexual crossdresser.

Last Friday of the year with my friends

Well it has been another long and busy week for my male side so again no midweek outing, it has been a month sense I have been out to Starbucks but then the holidays can do that. I had an awesome Christmas with family coming to town and yes that means all traces of Susan had to be hid away. it is funny as over the last year going out so much and as I live by myself Susan’s stuff has kind of mingled with her male counterparts stuff where I use to be really careful to keep them separate. I was really worried I might miss something and someone else would find it, actually I did but I was the one who found it first. It was a lot of work hiding everything for a couple of days plus it felt like I was getting rid of Susan as least temporarily which was not a good feeling. It gives on perspective as I know Susan is a big part of me and will never go away just like my male side. It was nice though to spend the time with my family and I guess the few days of Susan being locked away was worth it. I hope each and every one of you had a wonderful Christmas and got time to spend with family and friends as that is really the best present you can get.

Oh and here is just a little side note, one of the girls in our group has opened a restaurant and bar called Tiger Lily located at 1109 Washington St. in Vancouver, WA 98660, her name is Jackie Stone and I just wanted to give her a little plug here to help support another T-Girl who is starting a business. I have not been there yet but hope to soon but several of the girls from the group have gone and all say it is really good and very comfortable so if you are in Vancouver Washington please check her place out and once I go there I will let you know my thoughts.

Well as I said it was a busy week so I got home late which means Susan had to rush to get ready which is okay on occasion but I do really like the fun relaxing time getting Susan ready. It was almost 7 when I left home so I got to Sweethome about 7:30 so being later than normal I had to park out on the street, I parked right behind another car which turned out to be Laura so we walked in together. Amy, Cassandra, Chris and Roxy were already there. Well it turns out Levi the bar tender is sick tonight so Jodie was working; now here is the funny part. I have met here on many occasions here and even got pictures with her but did not know she worked here as Friday night is her normal night off so she has come in as a customer, I guess we do learn a little more each day.

There were two women playing video poker and chatting with us as our table was right next to them well after they finished they came over and asked if they could join us. Their names were Jennifer and Maria and they were just awesome and they thought we were pretty great too. They actually hung out with us all night long.

Well more of our group started to show up and again we had a great turnout including some girls that don’t get out mush. Well I had ordered dinner and was eating when I almost fell off my chair as Melissa and Heather walked in, they have not been out with the group for a long time. We have kept in touch on facebook and the occasional text but well the last time I saw either of them Melissa had shaved her head and as you can see from the picture her hair is almost down to her shoulders now, Melissa is the one on the left side of picture. It was so awesome to see them again. It was wonderful to talk with them and catch up on what is new; yes facebook is great for keeping up with friends and so is e-mail and texting but nothing is as nice as sitting face to face and talking. I think that is the one bad thing about technology is we are losing the personal connection between people. Don’t get me wrong as technology is great and does give us a lot of advantages as through my facebook and this blog I have met some awesome friends around the world that I would never have known if it was not for the internet but if I ever won the lottery I would love to travel sand meet them in person. Any way Heather was commenting that she hasn’t added any new pictures to her facebook page and yes I will send her the above picture but what a great excuse to have another picture taken, yes Susan like most T-Girls love to have their picture taken.

Well by 9:30 the bar was getting busy but with the Holiday not overly busy but it was a fun night. It was finally time for Karaoke and several of our group sang and did a wonderful job. Blue also showed up and of course came over and talked with us, she is one of the Karaoke group and that group has been so wonderful to us here. We talked for a bit and of course I had to find out how things were with her and the guy she met a couple weeks ago you know girl talk.

Well it was getting late and most of our group had left, Jennifer and Maria also left but said they would be back again on Friday nights so hopefully we will see them again as they really were fun. Kelsey one of the girls who comes in to sing came over and talked with us, I have met here once before here but this was the first time we have really talked. She was also really nice. She is the one who wanted me to sing with here awhile back that I told her I would the next week as that night she had had a little much to drink and I figured she wouldn’t remember the next week. Well again tonight she asked me to sing with her and I promise next Friday I would but tonight she had not drank as much so I may find myself singing next Friday. We will see.

Well we all paid our bills and put our coats on and were ready to leave when another woman came over to talk to us, she just wanted to tell us how nice we looked and how you don’t see woman dress up like we were as much anymore. What a nice compliment and of course we all thanked her and exchanged names but as I had another blonde moment I can’t recall here name. Now on her comment about woman not dressing up as much anymore I just want to clarify that that is okay. For us T-Girls we get a limited amount of time dressing so we are willing to put in the time and effort, but dressing every day this would be a lot of work. Even with going out about twice a week for the last few years if you add all the times I have ever dressed as Susan it would probably only be about 2 years of dressing if I did it every day. So for me it is still fun and exciting to try the different looks, makeup, dresses and heels. Most girls get this dressing by the time they are in their early teens. But all that matters is that one is happy with whom they are in life and live their life the way they want to.

Thanks for reading and may you all have a Happy and safe New Year!

December 29, 2012 Posted by | Sweethome | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Friday night before Christmas with friends

Well I would like to start off by wishing everyone a Merry Christmas as this will be my last blog before Christmas. I know not everyone celebrates Christmas and if you don’t please just skip over this part.

Well it has been another long week and Susan could not get out during the week so I was really looking forward to tonight and spending a fun Friday night with friends. It is funny how much I look forward to this especially if it is the only night that week that I can be Susan. With the holidays, work and Family right now precious little time for Susan buy any time is better than no time.

I started getting ready a little early as I wanted to be to Sweethome early. Cassandra and Victoria talked to our attorney Beth Allen and had information for us, they are our two contact people in the case we have against the P-Club. I got to Sweethome by 6:30 and Chris and Samantha were the only ones there. It really wasn’t long before others from our group started to show up. I had forgot tonight the Karaoke group was doing a rocky horror picture show theme not that I have anything I could have worn for that any way. Actually I have only seen the movie once way back when I was in High School. Their group started to show up and almost all the girls had corsets on and even a couple of the men, the girls looked awesome. I have a red corset but it is not a really good one, maybe I should see about finding a black one that fits right.

Well the six of us that are involved in the complaint with the P-Club were finally all there so we went and sat at another table and Cassandra and Victoria went over what Beth our attorney told them and I am not going into details on this as it is open case but the case is proceeding and the group is in agreement on how we want to proceed which is taking our attorneys advice which only makes sense in a case like this. I am still a little nervous about having to give my real name when this goes to court but it is something I feel I have to do as this is too important to not take a stand. Any way we talked about 30 minutes and then joined back with our group.

The club was getting packed by now which is always so much fun as everyone there is always so nice and friendly. It really is a great place to go for an evening out. Chris had brought little gifts for everyone in the group which was so sweet of him, thanks so much Chris you are an awesome friend. We all sat around and talked and had a wonderful time, even Roxy stayed till midnight which for her is late.

Michelle and Kim showed up, Michelle has been coming out so much lately and it is so wonderful to see. She was our groups Member of the month this month as she has been so active with the group. Kim also came which is always wonderful as she is so supportive of all us girls and just so much fun to be around. Her and Chris were going to sing a Karaoke song together but never got a chance. We really do have a wonderful group of friends in our group. Heather from the Karaoke group came over and hung out with us for a while; she really is nice and had on this really cute corset in black.

Well karaoke was going and Chris sang of course and did great as always. Blue came over and was talking to me; well it was her turn to sing so she talked me into going up with her to sing. Silly me thought I would just be in the back singing behind her but it turns out they had two microphones so we were both singing. It was a little scarry6 but I did have a fun time and I would never have done it on my own. We sang “Sitting on the dock of the Bay” which is one of my favorites and as such a song I actually know most of the words to.

It was a really fun night and even a couple of our group dressed for the Rocky Horror picture show, Jan and Cristine both had on French maids outfits and looked really good. Everyone had such a fun night and as always the nights go by so fast. Soon it was 1 am and time to leave, well those of us who were still there. We said our goodbyes and wished each other Merry Christmas. What a fun night.

Thanks for reading

Have a Merry Christmas, Happy Holiday and be safe.

December 22, 2012 Posted by | Sweethome | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Susan’s first wedding and no it was not mine

Well today was another first for Susan, I got to go to a wedding as Susan. Two of my friends Maya & Darla got married; actually they got married on Wednesday but had a second wedding Saturday for all their T-girls friend plus Maya really wanted to wear a wedding dress. I have been to weddings before but this one I was really looking forward to.

The wedding started at 3 pm so I was needed to leave by 2 pm. I was all ready to leave and even though it was early afternoon on a Saturday I didn’t even look outside to see if it was clear as two of my neighbors already know about this side of me, after words I thought I should have looked as the rest of my neighbors I hope don’t know but being a rainy day no one was outside.

I got to their new house about 2:45 and went in. They have just bought the house and have not moved in so they had it all set up for the wedding. It really is a beautiful home with hard wood floors and a huge deck. The two brides were upstairs getting ready for their big day again, how lucky to be able to have two weddings in 3 days. Darla had a few of her co-workers there and the rest were from our group. It was a small wedding I would say 20 people but it was the most fun wedding I have ever been to. The house was beautiful, Peggy did the flowers and helped with both weddings and did a fabulous job. Peggy and Cassandra along with Jan & Lynn were in the wedding party which made it special as you had two married couples from our group standing up with them so 3 T-girls and 3 GG’s, the perfect wedding. The brides came in and both looked so beautiful and happy and the ceremony was beautiful.

After the ceremony there were so many pictures taken and everyone wanted a picture with the brides including Susan so here is the picture. This is Darla, Me and Maya and yes it is intimidating to be in pictures with two beautiful brides. I think it is every T-girls dream to wear a wedding dress and not only got to wear one but to do it while marring such a wonderful and supportive wife. You can see how happy they are from the smiles on their faces. Afterward they did the cake cutting and it was a beautiful cake. We were all wondering which one would smear the cake on the others face first, they came close a couple times but neither wanted to mess up their makeup which I can totally understand.

They had a professional photographer there and for the life of me I can’t remember her name but she was awesome and she was taking pictures of everyone after the wedding so as you know how much T-girls like to have their pictures taken we were all lining up. Those pictures will be in a future blog as she will be focusing on the first wedding Wednesday first as those are the ones for all their family and then she will get to the pictures from Saturday. I really can’t wait to see them. Any way she was so awesome and friendly to everyone I just had to get a picture with her after all she should at least be in one picture. She was so cute just wish she had worn heels as I towered over her. I asked if when she touched up the photos if she could make me shorter and she laughed.

They had so much food for after the wedding they could have fed 50 people but it was so good. It was funny as Peggy made this awesome punch that needed pineapple juice and we discovered as we were putting it together that as they have not moved in yet they had no can opener to open the can. I pulled my MacGyver and opened the can with an old key and flashlight, for those too young to remember this show this will not make sense. Well we got this taken care of and discovered there was no cork screw to open the wine and for that we had to send someone to the store.

We had an awesome time talking and taking more pictures and then it was time to pick things up. It was funny to see all of us moving chairs and tables in our dresses and heels. We go the chairs out to Peggy’s car and working on the tables and Cassandra turned the on over and tried to take it apart and finally said, “This table does not come apart” at which point Peggy walked over twisted and the base and support came apart and we all broke up laughing and of course I promised Cassandra this would be in my blog so here you are. After that May and Darla headed home to change before going to the Boiler Room. I stayed and helped Peggy clean up while the rest went to the Boiler room. It really only took about 30 minutes and yes even cleaning up was fun although I did take my heels off as my feet were starting to hurt.

We got to the Boiler room about 7:15 and they were already a little busy, turns out tonight was Santa Con. I had never heard of Santa Con, December 15 people everywhere dress in Santa or Mrs. Santa outfits and go out and the streets of Portland were full of Santa’s. The bartender Amanda was there tonight and of course remembered all of us including me which is awesome as the last time I was there was last summer. Any way while we were there two girls came over in really cute Santa outfits, they were there for the Santa con, the one was celebrating her 30th birthday and the other was her mom and they wanted to meet us and of course get a picture and I was only too happy to agree. It was such a fun day and night and we all had a wonderful time.

I want to thank Maya and Darla for doing a second wedding and including us in their special day. You two are awesome and I wish you both every happiness in your life together.

December 16, 2012 Posted by | Boiler Room, Out and about as Susan | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Great night out with my friends

Well it has been a long and ruff week for me and I was so looking forward to my Friday night out with my friends, actually I think more of them as my big quirky lovable family. We have different views on some things politics being one but in the end we all share a common bond of femininity and not just the T-girls in the group. The wives, girlfriends and even the GG’s in the group accept us all for who we are and the admirers in the group are just as accepting. Having a group like this is awesome and it has helped shape not only who I am but each and every member in the group. Besides I needed to be with friends and have some fun out with the girls.

As I was getting ready to go out I was thinking about what I could wear as the other group at Sweethome known as the Karaoke group who by the way I am happy to call friends as they have accepted us there were doing a theme night for one of their member’s birthday. It was a 1920’s – 1930’s gangster night. Now as a guy I could have put on my suit and been good as that is what men wore back then but the woman I guess what you would call flapper dresses and cute little hats and this is something my limited wardrobe is missing. The closes thing I have is my blue dress which is kind of layered so that was my choice for the night. I also decided to wear my one black wig that kind of has the era style, the big thing I thought was my makeup as I could do it in that look of course most woman back then wore red lipstick which is my favorite color and I tend to wear it a lot on Fridays.

Well I got to Sweethome just a little after 7 and Chris, Amy, Roxy and Samantha were all ready there. It was so great to be out with my friends, I got to talk with Samantha for a bit. Seems one of her neighbors saw her leave tonight so she is wondering if they figured it out and what or if they will say anything. I know that feeling so well as do most T-Girls. Soon more girls started to show up, from our group Cristine, Jan, Lynn and myself were the only ones who dressed for their theme night and Jan and Cristine really did a good job. It was so nice of them to include us in this as it did make us feel like part of the bigger group and yes even though only a few of us dressed the theme even their own group not everyone was in theme. Heather, one of the girls from their group wore this beautiful Aqua blue dress which it turns out was here prom dress and she looked amazing. Most of their group wore hats and they really looked good and of course they had a great time.

We had a good turnout maybe 15 again which is becoming our normal amount which is nice to see our girls getting out again. We always have such a fun time when we are out together. How awesome is it for a group of T-Girls to be able to get together and go out not only on a weekly basis but 2 or 3 times a week. This kind of support is so wonderful and makes it so easy to be who we truly are inside and for me that is a combination of female and male. Where ever you live find some friends to hang out with, join a group and if there is not one nearby start a group. One of the great things about being Susan is hugs, it is very common for females to hug where men almost never do this at least not with the same gender and that is sad as a hug gives you such a good and warm feeling. Everyone needs hugs throughout their day as it just makes you feel wonderful so if you have a friend give them a hug.

Kim showed up tonight which was awesome as she is such a nice person and fun to talk with. Her and Chris were going to well they did sing a duet in karaoke. They sang “the love shack” and did an awesome job and just had so much fun. I am still thinking about trying to sing one of these Fridays, I actually have a Christmas song I could probably do an okay job at but someone else sang it tonight and I didn’t want to repeat it, not a great excuse but it is the best one I have. I was a little more quiet tonight then normal from the long stressful week but being out with my friend and spending time as Susan really did help and what better way to start a weekend.

It was after 2 and by now it was just Cassandra and me and we were getting ready to leave when Bleue came over and sat with us to talk. She is one of the Karaoke group and has always been nice and said hi but it was nice to just sit and talk with her. Sadly I couldn’t remember her name and had to ask, I didn’t feel too bad as she couldn’t remember mine either. When she told me Blue I instantly remembered it as she has Blue hair and the first time I met her I told her I would remember it as her name and hair were the same, and yes the blue hair on her looks good. We chatted for a while and had a nice time. Mark the guy who does host the Karaoke came over and talked to us also and told us how nice it was our group was coming there. It is things like this that make one feel happy and accepted. Sweethome is really a wonderful accepting place to go and have a fun night out.

Well we finally left and my car had ice on the windshield which is the first time in a long time so had to sit and let my car warm up which when you are in a dress and open toed shoes you feel the cold more. It was a fun night and I think I got home around 2. I went straight to bed as I do have to get up a little early as I have this blog to update and a few things to do and then I have to start getting Susan ready as she has a wedding to go to today. How fun will that be? Maya one of the T-girls from our group got married to Darla who is a GG from our group on Wednesday, this was their traditional wedding for Family, today they are having another one for all their t-girl friends and yes both will wear wedding dresses today. Susan has never been to a weeding and this will be such a fun thing so yes there will be another blog and maybe some pictures.

Thanks for reading

December 15, 2012 Posted by | Sweethome | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Being positive and looking for the bright side of things when they go wrong.

Well this is not my normal blog as normally I write about my life as Susan and I have never really included a blog about my male side but I felt I needed to. People always tell me how relaxed and stress free I am both on my male and female side and that is really because of my feminine side and my ability to be Susan. The other thing I always hear is how positive I am and that is also true. I always try to see the positive side of everything including people, I look for the good and I do not dwell on the bad. I believe there is not point worrying about things that may or may not happen and things I cannot control. Now I am not saying things never get to me or bother me but I get over them pretty easy and put them behind me. This is my advice for today as there is almost always a positive side to everything. So here is why I say this.

I ran out of my favorite perfume this past weekend and I needed to get more as Susan always likes to smell nice and normally I would go shopping as Susan but was unable to work it into her schedule so it was up to my male self and as I had Christmas shopping to do I was ready. I only had to work part of the day on Tuesday so this was the perfect opportunity. The perfume I like is Britney Spears Fantasy and yes probably more for young girls but I like it, the only problem is the only place I have been able to find it is at Wal-Mart on 82nd Ave. in Portland so that was where I went first.

I got to Wal-Mart and started picking up some things I needed before heading over to the cosmetic area. Now this time of year even a man can shop the woman’s section or cosmetics area but I did want to make that the last things I got. I finally made it over to the cosmetic section and found the perfume section and they have it locked up behind glass. There was another man standing there so I asked if he was waiting and he told me someone had gone to find someone with the key. So I stood and waited and it took forever or at least seemed to be forever. Another employee walked by so I asked her and was told the same thing she would send someone with the key so again we waited. Finally the other man walked off and gave up leaving me standing there by myself. Another employee came by and I told her I had been waiting and she said she would send someone right over so again I waited. Now if this had been something for my male self I would have given up and left as this is not good customer service but as I said Susan has my male self wrapped around her finger and he will do almost anything for my female side so I waited.

Finally another employee came along and she seemed to be straightening up the area so I asked her and it turns out she is the one who works in this section and has the key. I told her I had asked several employees who all said they would send her right over and all she said was no one had called her. I had kind of expected at least an, I am sorry you had to wait but it was more she wanted me to know it was not her fault which I already knew. I was at this point a little irritated but I was getting my perfume and although it felt like I had waited an hour it was in reality only about 15 minutes. I headed towards the check stands to but my stuff and head to the mall and by the time I left the store I had forgot about it I mean after all it was only 15 minutes out of my life besides I was hungry and had more shopping to do, as I said I am very good at letting things go and not letting them bother me.

I got to Clackamas Town center and parked by JC Pennies and went in, my first stop was to get some food before I started shopping so I headed towards the food court. I was almost to the food court when I heard people start screaming and all kinds of noise and everyone started running in all directions including towards me. Behind the crowd I could see someone in black and he had a gun and was shooting, I had walked into a bad situation. I was still far enough away and I quickly turned and ran the other way with the rest of the people and made it out of the mall safely but as I thought over it as I was outside with the rest of the people hiding I started thinking about those 15 minutes at Wal-Mart and the bad customer service I had gotten and how lucky I was I had to wait and that I did wait. Otherwise I would have gotten to the mall 15 minutes earlier and I would have been eating in the food court when the shooting started. I doubt if I will ever complain about having to wait again.

I had to stay with all the other people and wait to be interviewed by the police which got me thinking about what if I had gone as Susan. It just goes to show we never know what is going to happen, today, tomorrow or next year. Now this will not in any way change my feelings for being Susan or my going out, as Susan is a big part of who I am but one can’t help but think about it. My thoughts are for those who were not as lucky as I was and for their families.

This blog is for me and hopefully be the only time I need to write about my male side and my future blogs will be back to Susan and about happier things.

December 12, 2012 Posted by | shopping | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Fourth annual Winter Gala

Well tonight was our fourth annual Winter Gala, Kathy, mandie & Danielle open their home each year to host this for our group, how awesome is that. I got to their home about 6:30 and there were already girls there. I had been looking forward to this party for week as it was a good chance to wear my red dress which I love but never really get a chance to wear it as it is not the type of dress I would wear out to a bar. It is cool as they do a donation for the local food bank each year so of course I brought a bag of food.

Now they had an open bar with a really cute bar tender all dressed in red so as we were both in red I had to get a picture. She is really awesome and has been at the party every year and I still don’t know her name. Actually I am sure I did know her name but as I only see her once a year I can’t remember it and would have felt bad asking her what her name was so I still don’t know.

They had so much food and it was all so good, they really do a wonderful job hosting this party. Yes I did eat more than I should have but did try to eat more of the healthy food but after all it is a Holiday party and that means eating too much. We had a really good turnout, several of us tried to count but with people moving around we never did get a good count but there were at least 45 there. I did make a real effort to try to talk with everyone and I think I did.

Peggy was there which was awesome as she has not been able to come out much do to work. It was so much fun to talk with her as she really is a wonderful friend. We have gone and got pedicures together before and had a blast. Maybe after the first of the year we can go again and get pedicures. I really love getting pedicures and going with a friend to get one makes it so much better.

Amy was also there and of course I had to get a picture with her, actually we got a couple together but the one I am posting is the one I got her to stand on the first step of the stairs so I am not taller than her. What an awesome picture. It really is fun to have parties like this as you really get to socialize more and get to know each other better

Several of us had our cameras out and took so many pictures; I took almost 80 as we really wanted to make sure that everyone that was there got in the pictures. Cassandra was having fun and took several pictures of our hands and feet well actually out nails and heels. I am sure at some point she will post to the group with a guess whose feet or hand they are. I am really looking forward to seeing all the pictures as you always miss something that happens at a Party as you can’t be every place at once. It also is a great way to remember what a fun night you had.

I was talking to one of the girls about pictures and I was telling her how I have over 1,500 pictures of Susan on my computer and only one of my male self. Turns out as Susan I love to have my picture taken but my male self avoids the camera as much as he can.

Kim also showed up and she is so nice. She had on this really cute black dress and looked really nice. She was so excited as she had her nails done for the party and had this really pretty reddish color and yes I did take a picture of our hands with our nails. It was nice to sit and talk with her as she really is nice and treats all us girls so wonderful.

Alicia also made it to the party and we talked for a bit. It is nice seeing her get out more as there was about a year where she couldn’t get out. Looking through my pictures I did get one of her but never thought to get one of us together yes another blonde moment. Will have to make sure and do that next time she is out. By the way one reason I don’t post all of the pictures is I won’t post any pictures that I did not ask first if they minded, and it is not so much they say no but rather I forget to ask.

Christy also made it to the party so I got to spend some time talking with her. She also is very nice as really all the girls in the group are. Christy also had on a really cute black dress, I think black was the theme of the night as that was the popular color but then the classic little black dress really is a beautiful look and I almost wore my little black dress. I really have made some really wonderful friends here in the group.

Victoria was her also and she is so excited as she leaves for Thailand in 30 days for her SRS. We talked a little about this and she is counting down the days like a little girl and you can just see how happy she is now. We are all so happy for her and we are all wishing her our best. Teresa was also there; she went to Thailand last December and missed the party so this was fun to have her here. She is going to Thailand with Victoria for at least part of the time which is really nice of her.

Jenn also made it and she had on this really pretty red dress and yes as we both wore red I had to get a picture with her plus as she is just a bit taller than me I don’t feel so tall. We could almost be sisters of course that would make me the older sister. Jenn is awesome and so much fun to talk with.

Bobbie and Pam were also at the Party. Bobbie had her first facial surgery the beginning of the week so it was awesome they could make it. She still had a little bruising on her neck but looked awesome considering the surgery. They are in town for a couple more weeks as she has I think two more surgeries in the next couple weeks. Pam her wife is so wonderful and so supportive of her which is really awesome. I got a chance to talk with them for a while and really are a great couple. Just goes to show that there are woman out there that are okay with Transgender. Actually our group has many GG’s that are awesome and so supportive, Pam, Peggy, Kim, Kathy just to mention a few.

Dana also made it she has been getting out more which is wonderful as she lives a couple hours south so it is hard for her to get out. Got a chance to talk with her for a while. She is a lot of fun to hang out with and she loves to dance.

This is a picture of me with Shannon at least I think that was her name. I have met her once before and she actually looks like Jennifer Aniston from Friends a little at least I think so. I had to include this picture as I thought it was such a cute picture, I usually don’t post a lot of close ups but I just liked this one. Only chatted with her briefly and I wish we had more time to talk as she seams really nice but I don’t know a lot about her

Monica also was at the party and I think this is the first time I have seen her out in over a year so it was nice to talk with her and find out what is new. Lorna, Sophia and their son also made it and I really didn’t get a chance to talk much with them which is a shame as they are really nice and Lorna always has great stories. It is funny as during the party I was pretty sure I had talked with everyone but going back over the pictures I realized I didn’t which is a shame

In all it was such a fun night and I was sad to see it come to an end. I want to thank Kathy, Mandie and Danielle for such an awesome wonderful party and all their hard work and opening their home for us. You 3 are awesome and I am happy to call you friends.

December 9, 2012 Posted by | Christmas, Holiday | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Friday night out with the girls

Well it has been another long week for Susan’s male self so there was no chance to get out during the week so I was really looking forward to Friday night with my friends. We always have such a fun time when we go out together and Sweethome is such an awesome and friendly place to go. I find my time as Susan is so relaxing for me but also I think spending time with my friends has the same effect so it is such a wonderful evening and anything that is wrong in my life is gone by the end of the night, Friends really do make you happy.

Well I spent a little more time getting ready tonight, a little over 1 ½ hours, now it really doesn’t take me that long to get ready but I find the time spent transforming myself into Susan is also very relaxing and just plain fun. Carefully doing your makeup, nails, hair or in my case wig and of course clothes. I guess I am just making up for when I was little and didn’t get the chance to play dress up. How much fun would that have been if when I was say 6 to 14 if I could have been able to dress up like all the other little girls. Any way I was out my door by 6:30 and on my way.

I got to Sweethome before 7 and for the first time in weeks was able to park in their parking lot which really is a big thing as they only have 4 parking spots. Cassandra and Chris were the only 2 from our group there so far but there were several other people there playing video lottery. They actually do a good business here for their video lottery, they have 6 or 7 machines but I would say there were at least 3 people playing the whole time we were there from 7 till almost 1:30 and it is like that every Friday. Well I ordered dinner as this girl was hungry and they really do have wonderful food here. It was kind of slow till about a little after 8 when people started to show up including girls from our group. I think we had about 15 from our group here tonight which makes it a lot of fun.

One of the girls, I really should learn her name, came over to our table from the Karaoke group. The next two weeks they have birthdays in their groups on Friday nights and they are doing a theme night and wanted to invite us to participate in it. Next Friday is a gangster night so they are dressing up in outfits from the 1920-1930 so for the woman it would be like flapper dresses. I am not sure I can find an outfit like that so may just wear my little black dress and just do my makeup in that time period look. The following Friday is Rocky Horror picture show night and again I don’t think I have anything I could wear for that. Either way it will be a lot of fun and how cool is it that they included us in it.

Well Danielle was there, the first time in several weeks, she is the GG that contacted me on Facebook and told me about this place so really without her we would never have found Sweethome. I only got to talk with her for a short time which was too bad as she really is nice but it was my turn to play pool. I played against Petra and it was a close game. She was down to the 8 ball and I still had 2 balls but one was right in front of the corner and it was my shot. I had a good shot at the one ball but the only problem was if I missed Petra would have an easy shot at the 8 but if I made it I could run the table so I took the shot and missed so I lost but a really good game.

Lorraine also made it again tonight and she brought her boyfriend for a little bit, I think he had to go to work so he wasn’t there long. We have met him before at the P-Club and he is also very nice. Any way I got a chance to talk with Lorraine for a while. Later Michelle, Lorraine and I were talking and of course we had to get a few pictures this is the 3 of us. It was a really fun night.

The Karaoke was awesome as usual with Lorraine, Chris, Lynn and even Jan Singing and they all did an awesome job. It really looks like so much fun and I have thought about giving it a try but I can’t get past the fear of being up in front of people singing which makes no sense as I have no problem going out dressed as Susan and could care less what people think. Well maybe I will get over this fear someday.

Later on Tania showed up with a bunch of her friends. I actually met her here several weeks ago and she was the one that wanted me to sing with her. She is also really awesome, should have got a picture with her also but forgot. She introduced me to her fiancée and 4 of her friends and for the life of me I can’t remember any of their names, giving this blonde that much information all at once is just too much. Any way they were all really nice and we had a fun time. It really is a fun place to go on a Friday night.

Well it was late and after 1 when we left. I cannot think of a better way to end a long busy week than with friends.

Thanks for reading.

December 8, 2012 Posted by | Sweethome | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Saturday night out with friends at Harvey’s Comedy Club

Well tonight was Susan’s 4th night in a row out this week which is more than I normally go out but it just worked out this way. Tonight our group was going to Harvey’s Comedy Club which is always such a fun night out. As normal the plan for those who can is to meet at Fox & hound at 7 for drinks and snacks and a little social time before the show. Actually we do this as parking is easier here than by Harvey’s and it is only a 7 block walk from there.

I was out my door and on my way by 6:20 which was good as I didn’t know how traffic was. I got to Fox & Hound at 6:50 and found a parking spot right outside the door. I went in and I was the first one there so I got a table and waited. It was only a couple minutes when Kim showed up so it gave us a chance to talk. It really wasn’t long before others started to show up. By about 8 we had 13 of us there at Fox & Hound, Amy & Petra showed up just to have dinner with us. We tried to talk them into going to Harvey’s but they couldn’t but was still awesome to see them out. We had a great time and finally it was 8:30 and time to walk over to Harvey’s and yes I remembered my umbrella as rain and Susan do not mix. Actually it was just barely raining but still in 7 blocks I am sure my makeup would have run. I walked with Pam and Bobbi which gave me a chance to talk with them more; they are a very nice couple.

We got to Harvey’s and went into their lounge and found the rest of our group we actually had 20 of us there for the show. More people started to show up and the lounge got full so we knew there would be a good crowd tonight. A couple girls wanted to get their pictures taken with us and after all I and most of our group never turn down a chance to have our picture taken so we agreed as long as we could also get a picture with also so out came the cameras. These two girls were so awesome and took pictures with several of us. We were all having such a fun time and what better way to pass time waiting for the show to start. As I was looking around I noticed several other people taking pictures of us including another woman so I went over and asked her if she wanted to get a picture of her with me and of course she did, after all who wouldn’t. She also let me get a picture with her which is the next picture here. I really wish I had thought to at least ask their names but what can I say I had a blonde moment. Actually she ended up getting her picture with several of the girls also. It was turning out to be a really fun night.

Well we had a great time talking but finally it was time to go in for the show, Kim our waitress had our tables already for us which kind of makes you feel important while others had to wait to be seated we just walked in to our tables. It didn’t take long for the showroom to fill up. Kim came and took our orders, she is so awesome and remembers most of us by name and even what we want so really all I had to do was say yes when she asked if I wanted what I always get

The show was really good and the MC and both comedians were awesome as always. It was funny as all the times we have gone here I can’t remember have in bad comedian, yes there was one that was not that good but still a fun night. Any way tonight’s headliner was Steven Kent McFarlin who is known as Spanky and he was awesome, we were laughing so hard by the end of the show that my sides hurt. He was truly awesome and if you ever get the chance to see his show you must.

Harvey’s is such a fun night out and if you like comedy you really should go check them out. Good food, great staff and an awesome show what could be a more fun night. We have never had a bad night there and the staff treats us so well. Well after the show was over we took some more pictures as I needed well wanted a few more pictures to post. Well the show was over and time to head back to fox & Hound where we had parked. It was late and I was going to go home. Any way as we left it was really raining so out came the umbrella’s after all this is Portland Oregon. The walk back was not bad but did discover that walking in the rain even with an umbrella your feet get wet in open toe heels and yes they also get cold. Any way we were stopped at an intersection waiting for a light when a cab went by and hit a puddle and yes you guessed it sprayed water all over my feet and lower legs, luckily I was wearing a dress that was above the knees so the dress did not get wet as that would have been terrible. It still was a fun night and I look forward to the next night out at Harvey’s.

Thanks for reading.

Shania and Susan at Harvey’s Comedy Club

Susan and Bobbi at Harvey’s Comedy Club

December 2, 2012 Posted by | Harvey's Comedy Club | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Wow a fun night with friends and an end to a long week

Well it is Friday night again and the end of a very long week not only for my male self but also for Susan. If you have been reading my blogs you will see this is the 3rd night in a row Susan has gotten out. I usually try to limit my Susan time to twice a week but there are those occasions that pop up now and then that only Susan can handle and since there are weeks that I may not get out at all heaven forbid I think it all works out in the end. Now some people may say if I like it why do I set limits so here are my words of wisdom on this and this is for me and not others. As much as I enjoy being Susan I also enjoy, like and need my male side too. For me I need balance and just the same way I won’t deny my Susan side I also can’t deny my male side. Look at it this way, I love Ice Cream and cookies but I can’t eat them all the time and they can’t be my only source of food or Susan would not fit in any of her dresses. I think finding a balance that is right for you is what makes you happy, it may be once a month, week or a little everyday but it is something we all have to figure out for ourselves and I am lucky as I have figured it out after many years.

Any way I started getting ready a little early as I knew some would be at Sweethome early as they were going to watch a college football game, sounds funny for a group of men to dress as woman to go to a bar to watch football. Any way as I was getting ready and as I had time I tried a different look on my eyes. It turned out well and I wish I had thought enough to get a picture but I am blonde and tend to forget things like that. Any way it took me a lot longer to do my eyes as I had a lot more blending to do.

I got to Sweethome about 6:45 so still earlier than normal and Cassandra, Chris and Roxy were already there. Cassandra had gotten there at 5 and Chris & Roxy just a little before 6. Cassandra had already eaten so I went ahead and ordered dinner as I was hungry as I skipped lunch to try and get home and get ready to go out early. I even made it early enough to catch the end of the game not that Susan or my male self for that matter is that big of a football fan, but what is important is spending time with my friends.

Well where we sit we can see outside whenever someone comes in and it wasn’t long after I got there that it really started to rain hard and every time the door opened you could just see the rain coming down and of course I left my umbrella in the car, another blonde moment. Well it was about 7:30 when other girls started to show up, first was Samantha. She comes up from Eugene Oregon every once in a while, she is not actually a member of the group but found out about our group from my blog here so when she is coming up she e-mails me to see if we will be out and where so I guess my blog does serve a purpose other than just being an online diary of my life as Susan. Any way Samantha is really nice and always fun to hang out with.

A few of the Karaoke group started to show up as some get there early like us. Heather was trying to hang some decorations as it turns out her sister’s husband I think was having a birthday that night. Well as I am a little taller than the average girl especially when I have my 3 ½ inch heels on I helped her as I could reach up without standing on a chair, yes the ceilings are a little low in this bar. Actually Heather is really an awesome person so it was fun to help her out.

Amy showed up which is always nice, and she brought Pam with her. This is the first time I have met Pam, Pam is married to Bobbie and they are in town because Bobbie is having some of his surgeries over the next couple weeks. Pam is totally supportive of Bobbie which is so awesome. I got to talk with her for a bit and she is really nice so it goes to show there are woman out there that are okay with transgender people. It was funny we got on the topic of how we do are nails, Cassandra and I both do them the same way. Well it turns out Cassandra carries almost all her nails with her in her purse. Well maybe not all of them but she did have 3 plastic bags and I bet enough nails to do 10 girls so Cassandra took Pam and Samantha over to a table and within 10 minutes both girls had long pink nails. Pam was thrilled and planed on wearing them back to Amy’s to show Bobbie who by the way didn’t make it out tonight as she is resting up for her surgeries. Pam said this was the first time she has ever had long nails like this. Funny to think that a GG has never had long nails, even I would probably have long nails all the time if it was okay for a man to do that.

Lorraine also showed up she has been coming out almost every week to hang out with our group. She is really fun and one of the bright spots from our time at the P-club. There is no update on the P-Club issue yet, BOLI is still preparing the case against them and I think probably sometime after January we may have a hearing date. I am still nervous about being a witness in a hearing. Any way it was fun to talk with Lorraine. We didn’t get a chance to play pool tonight as for some reason the night went by way to fast.

We had a good group again maybe 15 of us and the karaoke group was huge so the place was packed. Now as it has been a very busy week and Susan was incredibly tired so I guess it showed as Michelle one of the Karaoke girls came over and asked if I was okay as I had not been smiling like normal which was nice of her and have us a chance to talk. It was funny as I was sitting with 2 of the Michelle’s from our group so introductions were easy. Actually everyone in the Karaoke group is awesome and treats us wonderful.

Well Michelle the one from our group put in for Karaoke and wanted me and Cassandra to go up and sing with her so we did. So yes I did Karaoke tonight, not by myself but it was a start. Maybe someday I will be able to just go up and sing off key of course.

Well it was getting late almost 2 am which is the latest we have stayed here when this man who had been playing video poker walked by, he leaned next to me and said, I must tell you that you are very beautiful. I turned and said thank you at which point he heard my voice and I am guessing got a closer look at me because his next words were Holly shit you’re a guy, I think he was not bothered by the fact I was a crossdresser as the fact that he didn’t realize it before he spoke. He just smiled and walked away over to the bar and that was the end but Cassandra, Cristine and I all broke out into giggles. Now I have had men tall me I was beautiful before but have always wondered if they knew I was a guy first or not. This is the first time that I know of that the person really thought I was a GG when he made the comment so it made my night.

Well as it poured rain all night long I was not looking forward to going out and getting wet, Susan and rain do not get along as it makes my makeup run. Well it was about 2:20 am when we finally left and as luck would have it, it had stopped raining so I guess someone was looking out for this pore girl.

Thanks for reading; I have added an old picture here as I want to try some of the picture features the wordpress has without messing up one of my previous blogs. Although the dress I am wearing is the same one I wore tonight. It was taken at Harvey’s Comedy club several months ago. It is Cassandra, Diane and me before the show.

Out at Harvey's Comedy Club

Cassandra, Diane and Susan

December 1, 2012 Posted by | Sweethome | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment


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