Susanmillers Blog

My life as a heterosexual crossdresser.

Sunday and some quiet Susan time at Starbucks

Well it is Sunday and going to be 90 out again today and hot for the next 10 days so I was determined to finish my yard work, it was just spreading rocks around my palm trees (see my blog from last week if you want a look at them) but the one bad thing about my car which I love and gets great gas mileage is it doesn’t haul much wait especially when you are putting bags of crushed marble in it so I had to make 3 trips to home depot. I finished about 1pm and went and rested before taking a nice cool shower and getting ready for the rest of my day as Susan.

I didn’t have a lot planned, grocery shopping and then to Starbucks to get all caught up on my blogs as I don’t like being behind on them and that will probably happen again next week as I am going to visit my brother and his family next weekend so I know Wednesday nights dinner blog will be late. I was all ready a little before 3 and on my way.

My first stop was the grocery store to do my weekly shopping as I didn’t get to it yesterday. Now I am just shopping for myself so it doesn’t take long as it is mostly perishable stuff like vegetables, yes, I am making a bigger effort to eat heathy. I try to have a salad each day with one of my meals with cauliflower, broccoli and tomatoes. I figure they make up for the ranch dressing I put on it. it is fun though to just be out doing something as simple and everyday type thing as grocery shopping. I got what I needed and was back home a little before 4 and just parked in my driveway and took my 2 bags inside and put them away.

I grabbed my computer and was on my way to Starbucks, I decided to go to the one by my house as it is 90+ outside so I will be sitting inside today. I got there about 4 and went in, 3 of the tables outside had people sitting at them even though it was hot but it was also a little windy and I didn’t want to mess up my hair. I guess others had that idea as there were 7 tables taken inside. I ordered my drink and set my computer up as I waited for my order. I wrote my blog from Saturday and posted it online and then caught up with some e-mails and a little work. It is just so relaxing to be here at Starbucks and yes, I could have just as easily done this from home but what fun would that be. Here I am out around other people and can people watch and they also get to see me and see I am no different then they are, just here working on my computer. There were a few others on their computers, one young girl doing what looked like schoolwork and one man watching something on his cell phone and he was here when I got here and still there when I left 2 ½ hours later. One family came in and looked like they had dinner here as they bought a couple salads and sandwiches for the kids.

Now I had been here about 30 minutes and 2 men came in I knew as I kind of worked with them a few years back. Well they goy their drinks and sat at a table only maybe less then 10 feet from me, close enough I could kind of hear their conversation if I wanted. Well I just kept my head down and worked on my computer and paid no attention to them and they seemed to pay no attention to me. This one is close to where I live and I would say 1 in 3 times I go here I see someone I know at least on a casual basis. Years ago I was so afraid of this I would drive to a Starbucks 12 miles away just to be safe. Well as always, the time flew by and it was after 6:30 and I realized I hadn’t eaten yet so it was time to pack up for the night.

I left Starbucks and decided to stop at Panda Express and get some dinner and take it home. The rest of the night I watched TV and did some laundry before washing Susan asway and going to bed looking forward to our zoom meeting tomorrow evening.

Stay safe and be happy and thanks for reading my blog and be sure and read my most recent blog to see what is new in my life.

July 26, 2021 Posted by | Starbucks | , , , , | Leave a comment

Saturday Susan time and then to the escape

Well it is Saturday and I get some Susan time in the afternoon and evening. I still had some work in my yard to finish this morning so it wasn’t till about 12:30 that I started getting ready. Now I had put some thought into my look today and what I would wear as I want it to be casual enough for the day but also look good for tonight as I plan on going to the Escape so I need that daytime to evening look. I settled on a deep brown to a coppery gold blend of eye shadow which I was really happy with the outcome and then for my close it was black leggings and a maroon top, it was a cute look and finished off with a brick red lipstick. I was all ready by a little after 2pm.

Now my plan for the day was to go out to the cemetery and put flowers on my mom and dad’s graves, now I have been there plenty of times as Susan but this will be my first trip there since my mom was laid to rest beside my dad. I left home and my usual trip is to Fred Meyers at Johnson creek to pick up flowers and then up to the cemetery. I got to Fred Meyers about 2:40 and went in, they were really busy but I was just here for flowers. I picked out 2 bouquets and was on my way to the cemetery, it is only about 10 minutes from here so I was there right about 3pm. Now there were some other people here and a couple of groups in the section I was in but still a ways away.

I got out and walked out to where my parents are and placed the flowers on the grave. It is different from the last times as they are now side by side and I am dealing with the fact they are both gone from my life. I know that they are at peace together in heaven but it is the selfish part of the fact they are gone from my life for now. I spent about 30 minutes here and thought about the fact as far as I know they did not know about this side of me the daughter they never knew that is visiting them and wondered what they think about that. I did get a couple pictures here as it somehow makes me feel closer to them to have the pictures here. I walked back to my car; it was about 3:45 now so I thought about what to do next. It is about 30 minutes to get back home and as I want to be to the Escape between 5:30 and 6 I decided to go to Starbucks at Cascade station and catch up on my blogs, its only about 20 minutes away and only about 5 minutes from the Escape.

I got to the Starbucks a little after 4 and parked right out front, now this Starbucks has 2 tables right in front of the door and 11 on the patio to the east and all but 3 were empty so I had my choice of tables. I got my computer and went in and wow were they busy, there were 7 people online to order and at least 10 waiting for their order. I went and got in line and waited my turn as I watched the tables outside, they were slowly filling up. By the time I ordered there were only 2 open tables and they were in the sunshine. I placed my order and the young lady who helped me told me she loved my eye makeup which made me feel good so I thanked her. I went to stand in line to wait for it wondering if I would get a table. Well as I waited standing right by the door, I saw the 3 ladies at the table right outside the door get up and leave, and I know it is probably cheating but I stepped out really quick and put my computer on the table as this one was in the shade.

I got my drink and went out and set up my computer and started on my blog from Wednesday night dinner. Now there was no breeze and even in the shade it was hot actually really hot. I looked around and yes tables were turning over pretty fast so I looked at my phone and it is 90 out right now, it is going to be upper 80’s to mid-90’s for the next 10 days. Well this week I was watching for an open table inside where it was cooler and I only had to wait about 15 minutes till one opened so I moved back inside. Before I knew it, it was 5:40 so I packed up and was off to the Escape.

I got to the Escape and it seemed a little quiet and there was a table with flowers and balloons on it. I went ton placed my order for dinner and was talking to the bar tender, one f the part time cooks who had worked here for many years passed away the other day, he was 64 and his heart just stopped. Now I didn’t know him well but still sad and it got me thinking. Maybe it does come in 3’s as one of my parent’s longtime friends who was at my mom’s funeral fell last week and also passed away this week so I have that funeral to go to in a couple weeks.

Well as I waited for my food, I finished my blog from Wednesday nights dinner and posted it and yes there was a different feeling here tonight as the staff was all sad as were a lot of the regulars and as the night went on more flowers were placed on the table for him. It was a really nice tribute that the Escape did for him. Now I knew Lauri would be here later and also Jan and Lynn, today is Lynn’s birthday, happy birthday sweetie, but other then then no one else had posted.

It was a little after 7 when Jan and Lynn showed up and yes, they were in matching outfits tonight mad looked so cute. I think it is awesome that they do this a lot, dress a like almost like twins. It was great to see them and of course I had to wish Lynn a happy birthday, James the KJ also knew about her birthday so when he would call her up to sing, he would call her by Lynn the birthday girl and yes, he had everyone sing happy birthday to her also. It was a fun night even though a little sad.

It was a little before 9 when Lauri showed up and that would be it for our group tonight, just the 4 of us but we had a fun time. I stayed till almost 11 before I called it a night as I was getting tired. I said my goodbyes and yes gave Lynn a birthday hug. It was sad to see the night come to an end but there will be more times out with my friends. Tomorrow I will get to spend the afternoon and evening as Susan again and Monday we will have our zoom meeting and our Wednesday night dinner. The one piece of advice I will leave you with is to cherish those around you as you never know. Let them know how much they mean to you. To all my friends you mean the world to me and I love you all.

Stay safe and be happy and thanks for reading my blog and be sure and read my most recent blog to see what is new in my life.

July 25, 2021 Posted by | Escape Bar & Grill, Starbucks | , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Wednesday night dinner at California Pizza Clackamas Town Center and another 1st for us

Well it is Wednesday and tonight our group is doing dinner at California Pizza at Clackamas Town Center, now I have eaten here many times when I have been out shopping with friends but never for a dinner or in a group so I am looking forward to it. I had narrowed it down to here or the Cheesecake Factory but Cheesecake Factory is only doing groups up to 6 and I had hoped for a bigger turnout tonight. In the end we will only have 5, Julie, Nicole, Barb, Cassandra and me, Yes Cassandra was going to make it tonight. I got home at 4:45 and quickly texted Julie to see if she wanted ride with me and she texted back yes so it would be a little rushed as I wanted to get there a little early as they don’t take reservations. That means being to Julies by 6 and leaving my home by 5:30 so I basically had 45 minutes to get ready.

I quickly got ready although still took time to do a good job and I was happy with everything except my lips, I love the red colors and the last couple weeks I have been using 2 different colors to try and get an ombre look, darker on the outside and lighter on the center to make my lips look fuller and it has worked pretty well so far but the colors I chose tonight seemed to clash a little more and didn’t fade out, I think they were just to dark. Any way I was all ready by 5:35 and walking out my front door. Now as I left, I put California Pizza in my GPS and it said 45 minutes so I figured we should leave Julie’s by 6:05 as she is just a few minutes closer then where I am. I then reset it for Julie’s house, yes, I know how to get there but my GPS gives me traffic and time and it said I would get to her house just a few minutes before 6 so everything was going well.

I got to Julie’s right on time and she had texted me the door was open and to come in so I did. Julie was all ready so we talked for a couple minutes and then we were on our way. It really is so nice to have her ride with me as we get to talk and just makes it that much ore fun, 2 girlfriends going out for dinner with their friends. Well it was a nice drove and no traffic so what ever the holdup was when I put it in my GPS at home was cleared up and we just sailed along. We got to Clackamas Town Center right at 6:30 and drove around to where California Pizza was and saw Nicole getting out of her car so we parked right next to her. we all walked over together and as we were really early, we stood outside and talked as it was a beautiful day and they did not look busy at all. Cassandra showed up a few minutes later and it was great to see her again as I have not seen her since we were in Las Vegas in early May. It was about 6:45 now so the 4 of us went in and we were shown to a table. A little before 7 Barb showed up so we were all there.

Our waitress tonight was Baily, she was probably early 20’s and she was awesome, she really seemed to love having us here and it was always, miss, ladies, honey and she was so delightful. She brought us our drinks and took out orders. Actually all the staff was awesome here and as we were near the pay station all the staff would say high to us as they passed, we really felt welcome. Now they have really good pizza here but as I am trying to eat a little healthier, I ordered their Cesar salad with chicken which is really good also.

We sat and talked and yes, we were all interested in Cassandra’s vacation, her and Peggy just got back from a 3-week trip across the country and we wanted to hear all about it. this is one of the main differences between my male and female self, Susan loves good conversation. We had a wonderful meal and great conversation. It was about 8:30 and our waitress Baily came over and asked if we wanted any dessert and we all said no so she told us we were all good then and thanked us. We asked about our bill and she informed us one of the customers picked up the check for our table. Cassandra asked her what she meant and she just said one of the customers had paid our bill so we asked who and she didn’t know but one of the other waitresses came over and said it was one of her tables and pointed out the window to a young lady sitting with her boyfriend at an outside table. Well we asked is they wanted to be anonymous and she said she thought so, so we debated for a while and then Cassandra being the brave sole she is walked out and thanked them and the next thing you know Cassandra is getting pictures with her. Cassandra came back in and told us she was so awesome; she had taken her boyfriend to Darcelle’s last weekend and they had had such a wonderful time she wanted to do this. Well as they were leaving, they walked by so we called them over so we could all thank them and Cassandra was right they were both awesome. Now I have had offers to buy me a drink but I can honestly say this is the first time I have ever had a stranger pick up my bill let alone the bill for all 5 of us. It was such a wonderful feeling thank you so much, I wish I had got their names.

We sat and talked more till a little after 9, Julie got our waitress to get a group picture of us, thanks Julie as I always forget this. We thanked Baily as she really was awesome and she thanked us for coming in and told us to be sure and come back and ask for her as she loved taking care of us. It was really a wonderful night. Well we all said out goodbyes and we left of course Julie rode with me so for us our night still had a little time, we got to talk as I drove Julie home and yes it was about what a wonderful evening we had. It was about 9:45 when I dropped Julie off at her house and headed home. Now I am looking forward to the weekend and spending time as Susan and hopefully getting all caught up on my blogs.

Stay safe and be happy and thanks for reading my blog and be sure and read my most recent blog to see what is new in my life.

July 24, 2021 Posted by | Dinner out, friends | , , , , | 2 Comments

Monday night zoom meeting

It is Monday again and that means another Zoom meeting with my friends. I got home and started getting ready. I took my time tonight as I had a lot of time. I was all ready by 6:30 so I got a few pictures and figured I would finish my blog from Sunday as I am behind. I went a head and started the meeting at 6:40 so it would be ready when other girls wanted to log on and to my surprise Danika signed on almost immediately and right after her was Nicole, Jan & Lynn, Jennifer and Emily so by 6:55 we had 7 of us logged on so I didn’t get to work on my blog but that was okay.

By a little after 7 we had everyone logged on and tonight, we had 12 of us, Danika, Nicole, Jan & Lynn, Jenifer, Emily, Melissa, Danielle, Trish, Patty, Jeanie and me. It was great to see and talk with everyone tonight. Now one of the subjects tonight was about eye lid lifts, yes one of our ladies had some droop in her eyelids which we will all face at some point, well it turns out if this effects your peripheral vision it is covered by medical insurance. Well when she went in for her consultation, she told the surgeon she was transgender so he was going to do a little more for her. Now she joined us tonight as the day she was supposed to have her surgery she woke up with a head cold so it was postponed but it was interesting to hear about what she plans on having done. Now I have no plans to transition or go full time but I also realize that time and age have an impact on your life, body and looks. I have talked with a few girls who wonder how long they can continue dressing before their age make it hard and for me, I don’t see an age that will happen at least at this point although I may have to tone it down some, plus we have some older members that look awesome when they go out.

We also had one of our ladies who had top surgery and yes, we have another one who will get theirs in a few days so that was the next topic. Now I think all of us has at least thought about having real breast and yes that include me also. Yes, when I am Susan, I do wish I had real breast as it would make it so much easier and yes fun. The thing is for me when I am not Susan, I don’t even think about it. Any way it was fun and interesting to hear about the procedure and how she feels now that it is done. These were to good topics tonight.

We talked a little more and yes Jennifer had a question tonight, what was one or more if the events in your life that you really remember that changed your life. Now for me the most important really wasn’t an event but some of the people I have et who helped me grow and accept this side of me. I got thinking about this and yes there was Lori who helped me get out of my car for the first time, Alice who would e-mail me and get me to join her when she came to Portland, Cassandra who talked me into joining her yahoo group which became the Rose City t-girls, and so many others but it is more then that. There are those who really had small impacts that really were bigger than you think. There was a girl named Rachel who talked me into going to dinner with her one night, this was early on when I maybe got out once every 4 to 6 months, well that night after dinner we stopped into Embers and that was the night, I met Cassandra and joined her group and started going out once a week. Had I not gone to dinner that night I night never have met Cassandra or at the very least it would have been month or years later. You never know who will have an impact on your life. Now I only mentioned a few here but there are so many who have had such a huge impact on my life and they really ate my best friends or more like family. I can’t imagine my life without them and the thought that had I not made that first outing or met these girls early on how different my life would have been and not in a good way.

Now on to my event and again there have been many that stick out but one I always come back to. If you read my blog, you know I love long nails and it is something I have always wanted to have and yes if I could have them all the time I would. Ay way it was back in the mid 1990’s and I had been dressing at home and yes sometime making late night drives but I really wanted to try acrylic nails and at this time I really didn’t know much about how they were done or removed. Well I had a 3-day weekend so I summoned all my courage and booked a hotel room for Thursday, Friday and Saturday night and told my roommate I was going camping. I then called and made an appointment to get my nails done. My plan was to get them done and spend the days in my hotel room and maybe make some late-night drive. Now I did go as Susan to get my nails done and this really was my first outing other then going through a burger king drive through. As I said I really didn’t do much that weekend other than fulfilling a lifelong dream of getting my nails done and I have loved them ever since. Now the funny thing is the next week at work I was talking with one of the ladies I worked with, the only one with acrylic nails and I complimented her on them and commented on why the other women at work didn’t get their nails done and I still remember what she said to me, she said you have no idea how expensive having nails like this is, and she told me she spent almost $1,000 a year at tat time to have her nails done. Well in my mind I was thinking I do know how expensive they are as I just spent almost $300 dollars on a hotel room for 3 night, $30 + tip to get acrylic nails and then 3 days later $15 + tip to have them removed and I only had them 3 days, way more expensive in a per day then what she spends. Now there were other event, going to Diva Las Vegas the first time, first tome going to a restaurant for dinner, first time to Starbucks or shopping, first tine flying but for me the nails was the one big thing and I still love getting them done today. Take some time and think back on your life and the big events you have had and the people you have met and they may seem small but all those things have an impact on you and your life.

We talked some more till about 9 and then girls started signing off and it was not long after the meeting came to a close for the night and now I am looking forward to Wednesday night dinner.

Stay safe and be happy with who you are. Thanks for reading my blog and be sure and read my most recent blog to see what is new on my life.

July 23, 2021 Posted by | zoom | , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Sunday Susan time at Starbucks

Well it is Sunday and I slept in to 8:30 and yes, I am stiff and sore from my yard work yesterday. I didn’t start getting ready till noon. My plan for today was simple, go grocery shopping as I didn’t do that yesterday and go to Starbucks and work on my blog. I still have my blog from Wednesday nights dinner at Who Song and Larry’s and yesterday and going to the Escape. Yes, I have found I am falling behind in my blogs. I took my time getting ready as I wanted to try for a good daytime look, I used my rose-colored eye shadow and a brick red lipstick and was happy with the look. I was all ready by 2pm. Now it was off to the grocery store.

Grabbed my purse and I was on my way to Fred Meyers for my weekly shopping. I got there and went in and did my shopping for the week. Yes, this is a simple thing and not very exciting but it is an everyday type activity that I can do as Susan. Over the last 10 to 15 years Being Susan has gone from something I did in secret at home, to going out to LGBTQ friendly places, to going out to pretty much anyplace to doing everyday things as Susan. now being Susan is a part time thing for me and by that, I mean just a part of who I am but she has become a normal part of me and who I am. I did my shopping and was back home before 3 and parked in my driveway and took my groceries inside and put them away just like anyone else. I grabbed my computer and it was time to go to Starbucks.

I thought about going to the one by my house but this time of year their tables are on the sunny side of the building but the umbrellas give you some shade. I drove over and all the tables were taken so I decided to go to the one at Cascade station as they have probably 15 tables outside. I got there about 3:30 and parked out front and just like the Starbucks by my house they were really busy but I could see 2 open tables outside. I grabbed my computer and went in and they were just as busy, 5 people waiting for their drinks and 6 people in line in front of me. I finally got up to the counter and ordered my drink and went and stood in the line to get my drink. As I stood there I looked outside and all the tables were now taken and there was only on small table in the corner by the back door so I went and set my computer up on it and then went back to wait for my drink, this is the busiest I have seen this place.

I got my drink and went over and sat down and started working on my blog from Wednesday nights dinner at Who Song and Larry’s. Now this week I was busy and got behind on my blogs and probably will be that way for a week or two so be patient with me catching up. I finished my blog and caught up on some e-mails and so work. It was fun people watching and yes again it was there were more females here today. It was about 4:45 and I saw one of the tables open outside so I picked up my stuff and moved out to that table. I really like sitting outside with all the people. I started working on my blog from Saturday but didn’t quiet finish it as it was almost 6 and I still needed to get something to eat. I left and drove home and made dinner and spent the rest of the evening watching TV. Now I am looking forward to tomorrow and Monday’s night Zoom meeting with my friends.

Stay safe and be happy with who you are and thanks for reading my blog and be sure and read my most recent blog.


July 22, 2021 Posted by | Starbucks | , , , , | Leave a comment

Saturday and going to the Escape

Well it is Saturday and I am going to the Escape tonight, now I don’t normally include my male side in my blogs but today is an exception. As I said in my last blog, I had some stuff to do today well actually it is working in my yard, something I have wanted to do for a few years and just didn’t have time. before my dad passed away, I would take my parents to Laughlin every spring and on one of the trips I had been talking about planning a palm tree in my front yard and both my parents thought it was a great idea. Well I decided to do it so today I got up before 6am before it got to hot to start my yard work, removing a 3 foot by 25-foot strip of grass on the very front of my yard by the sidewalk and planting 3 palm trees, 1 for my dad, 1 for my mom and 1 for me. Took longer than I thought and I didn’t finish till about 3pm. Now I bring this up as I kind of keep to myself with my neighbors but as I was working right by the sidewalk on the street a couple of them stopped by as I was working and talked to me and the new neighbor across the street to the right came over and introduced himself to me and we talked for a little while. Nothing was said about my dressing so still don’t know if they know but I suspect they do, but this is the most interaction I have had with my neighbors at one time. will include a picture of my project at the bottom.

Well it was 3pm when I finished and I was hot and sweaty but time to start getting ready to go out as I had posted I would be at the Escape around 5pm as Nicole was in town tonight and wanted to meat early before karaoke starts and it gets loud and a couple others said they would be early. I took a nice long shower and started getting ready. Now I was a little slower getting ready as I am a little sore as I don’t normally do work like this. I was all ready by 4:45. I grabbed my purse and was out my front door to my car in the driveway and was on my way.

I got to the Escape about 5:10 and had to park on the street about a ½ block down and walk back. I went in and Tina was already there sitting at the bar so I stood and talked to her for a bit. We went over and got one of the small tables before they got to busy, besides the chairs at these tables have backs which are way more comfortable. It wasn’t long and Nicole showed up. It was so great to see them in person, I haven’t seen Nicole in person in over a year and a half. Well Jan and Lynn also showed up early as did Michelle so we kind of pulled the next table over close to ours as these tables are really for 4 people and we now had 6. We ordered food and yes, I got the Chicken sandwich which is really good and probably healthier than a burger.

Michelle and Lynn both played the video poker machines for a little while and both won some money, 1 about $30 and the other $4 but still a win. When I play slot machines it is always the machine that wins. Renee also showed up which was nice but as we had a bigger group it was hard to talk with everyone as we were spread out a little. the zoom meetings are fun but just not the same as talking in person. Now it was pretty busy here for as early as it was and the group of ladies at the next table would cheer when ever someone new came in and after a couple times, they had the whole bar doing it, almost like in the old TV show Cheers where everyone yelled Norm when he came into the bar. It was pretty cool as I am sure it made people feel welcome when they came in.

We talked for a while and caught up, Nicole is in town for the weekend with her wife and was able to get out for a few hours tonight and will be back down on Wednesday night and hopes to make dinner so I am trying to figure something out on the east side of Portland to make it easier for her to get there. The Wednesday night dinners are taking some thought now as some of the places we went are closed, some have smaller table size and with more restaurants closed those that are open seem busier but then they may have less seating also. Any way I am trying to find a few new places but it is nice to be able to make reservations but it seems more restaurants are not doing reservations either. I really would like to get a bigger mix of places we go so we have a greater reach of interaction with people. We have talked about this in our zoom meetings and we all feel that the more interaction we can have with people the better as it lets them see we are no different then they are. I think that is why I like going to Starbucks so much.

It was a nice evening and soon it was 7:30 and karaoke started up and it got louder and it was hard to talk even with those right next to you. Tina and Nicole stuck it out for a little but bit by a little after 8 they were done. I figured I would stay till 9 and then go home as I am really tired not only from getting up so early today but the yard work I did. It is fun to listen to some of the singers well mainly the ones who sing songs I know. By 9 it was really busy in here almost like it was before the shutdowns. Well I was thinking of leaving but Patty showed up so I stayed to talk with her. yes, I can easily get distracted from leaving, I hardly ever leave when I planned to. It was almost 10 and just Jan, Lynn, Patty and I were left and I was ready to leave so I went and paid my bill and came back sat down to listen to one last song. Well as I sat there someone hugged me from behind, it turned out to be Dan. He had come out to see who all were here. Well I couldn’t leave now as I had to talk with him a little, it has been over 2 years since I have seen him. We talked for a little while but I was really feeling the long day. It was about 10:30 I just couldn’t take it and said my goodbyes and walked out to my car and

headed for home.

I got home and sat down on the couch for a minute to rest before going up to bed and the next thing I knew I woke up and it was after 1am, I had fallen asleep. I made my way upstairs and washed my makeup off and got into bed. Tomorrow is another day and yes some more Susan time.

Stay safe and be happy with who you are. Thanks for reading my blog and be sure and read my most recent blog to see what is new in my life.

July 19, 2021 Posted by | Escape Bar & Grill, friends | , , , , , | Leave a comment

Wednesday night dinner at Who Song & Larry’s

Well it is Wednesday night and that means getting together with my friends for dinner. Tonight we are going to Who Song & Larry’s on Vancouver on the Columbia River. Now o put it out to the group and got 7 that said they would go so I called Monday night to make reservations. Well turns out for more then 6 the earliest they could get us in was 7:45 so our dinner would be a little latter this week. Well on Tuesday 1 of our girls canceled but another wanted to come with a friend which would move us to 8 and I figured the difference at a table between 7 or 8 wouldn’t matter so I told them yes and I would call on Wednesday when they opened and make sure. Well Wednesday I called and I was right there was no problem with 8 so I emailed back we were all set. Well a little latter got an e-mail they were dropping out and later on another dropped off so we were down to just 5 of us. I figured I would just go a little early and update how many we had when I got there instead of calling again.

I got home from work and took my time getting ready as I had time tonight and I wanted to look good. I did a dark smokey eye but used a little silver on my lid to brighten it up, thought it looked good. I was all ready by 6:30 so I got a few pictures. Now it only takes 15 minutes to get there so I waited till 6:50 before leaving as I said I wanted to get there just a little early. I got there at 7:05 and parked and went in. it is funny as years ago I would never want to be the first one anyplace and I would have waited in my car till I saw another girl go in but I didn’t even think about it just got out of my car and walked in. I told the girls at the front counter we would only have 5 tonight and they were fine with it. so I went to wait in the bar for others to show up and our table to be ready.

I sat down and ordered a sprite and an order of their Cheese and Bean dip, which is awesome by the way, I could make a meal out of this. My bean dip no more them came when the young lady came and told me my table was ready, it was only 6:15, I guess a smaller group was easier to seat. I grabbed my drink and dip and she took my basket of chips and we went to my table to wait for the others to show up. Julie was the first to show up at 6:30 and Barb shortly after and then Jan & Lynn so we were all there. We talked for a little bit and then we ordered. I got my usual chicken & sour cream enchilada. We talked some more as we waited for our food. Now I always forget to get pictures when I am out with my friends which is strange as when I first started going out it was all about the pictures but luckily tonight Julie remembered and she got a couple pictures of us and texted them to her daughter. Julie came out to her daughter a few months back and she was telling her she was going out with the girls tonight and her daughter wanted a picture so I got to be in it with Julie, don’t we look cute together. I wonder what her daughter thought?

Our food came and we had a nice dinner with good conversation. Now what is funny is we not only had our waiter but another waiter checked on us a couple times and brought us more chips and salsa and I think it was the manager came by to see how we were doing, he also talked to me briefly when I was in the bar for a few minutes waiting on my bean dip. We always get great service here but really pretty much any place we go we have good service. Now the food here is really good but bigger portions and yes, I had trouble eating all mine, probably because I filled up and chips and bean dip. Don’t worry I did eat it all but I should have left a little. it was so nice to be out with my friends for dinner, the 15 months of the lockdown were really hard, you don’t realize how important something is till it is gone and being able to go out and get together with my friends is such a blessing.

The evening was wonderful and after we finished eating, we sat and talked for a while. It was about 9:30 when we paid our bills and left and yes, every employee, we passed either told us good night or to be sure and come back. We got outside and it was just a little on the cool side and I only bring this up as if we had had our original group of 8 our table would have been outside which at 7:45 when the sun was still up would have been nice but by now, we would have been a little cold and probably left earlier. I said my goodbyes to Barb and Julie and followed Jane & Lynn to their car as they had brought me a little present, well I knew what it was as they had told me they were bringing it. Thanks Jan & Lynn for it, can’t wait to use them.

I walked back to my car and then I was on my way home. It was after 10 when I got home which isn’t that late but have had a lot going on at work and I have been starting work at 6 this week which means I have to leave home by 5:20 so it will be a short night tonight but so worth it. I quickly washed my face to remove my makeup and then was off to bed. Now I am looking forward to the weekend when I will get to spend part of Saturday and Sunday as Susan, I do have stuff to do in the mornings so it won’t be till the afternoons but still will be fun.

Stay happy and healthy and thanks for reading my blog and be sure and read my most recent blog to see what is new on my life.

July 18, 2021 Posted by | Dinner out, friends, who song & larry | , , , | 1 Comment

Monday night zoom meeting

Well it is another Monday and the start of the week and that means spending time with my friends on a zoom meeting tonight. I got home from work and started getting ready, now tonight I did a more casual look and was pretty happy with how it turned out. I was all ready by 6 so had time for a few pictures and to relax and watch some TV. It is still strange not to call and talk to my mom. I logged on and started the meeting a little before 7 and waited for ladies to log on.

It was a little before 7 and girls started to log on. It is always nice to see my friends, tonight we had 11 of us in in 10 windows. Tonight we had Nicole, Jan, Lynn, Jennifer, Jeanie, Melissa, Danika, Emily, Danielle, Tori and me. Now the good thing about the Zoom meetings are everyone gets to be involved but also it allows you to join in even if not here locally. Tonight 2 of our ladies were from up by Seattle, one from Thailand and yes Jennifer was on vacation in Utah visiting family. Jennifer came out to her family over the last year and some have seen pictures and joined us on our zoom meetings but tonight she was at her daughter’s house as Jennifer and logged in for a while to join us, how awesome is that.

We talked for a little while just catching up and yes, I brought up this weeks Wednesday nights dinner at Who Song & Larry’s, Jan, Lynn and Danika are planning on going. It was about 8 when we got to Jennifer’s question of the night. how does this side of us influence how we see the world and women? It was interesting to hear some if the girl’s thoughts. Now for me there are several things, first I understand how long it takes for women to get ready, hair, makeup and clothes, jewelry. There is a lot to getting ready, the women I have dated I have never rushed them or said anything about how long they take. For the men out there if you have never done makeup before you just don’t understand, be patient as they get ready. the other thing is I have a better understanding of how the world sees them. For a man it really is all about how well you do things but for women they are viewed on that plus other things. Most of the time how well they do things is not what they are judged on first, sometimes it is not even in the top 5. Now I love doing my makeup and trying to look pretty but if that was all I was judged on or if that was the Most important thing people saw in me every day, I would not like it. what I am trying to say is don’t just judge someone on how they look or who they are, get to know them. We need to get away from judging people this way on everything. If we al took the time to get to know each other, if we could accept others have different beliefs, views, even political views. The key is to accept the differences and find things you can agree on and that would make the world a better place.

Now I like to dress and yes, I am transgender, now I don’t think everyone has to like what I do, or how I live my life but they do need to respect my right to be who I am. We talked a little more and yes some was about makeup. we had a wonderful evening. It was about 9 when girls started signing off and soon it was Jan, Lynn and me, we talked for a little while longer before we signed off for the night. now I am looking forward to Wednesday nights dinner.

Stay safe, be happy and treat others how you want to be treated.

Thanks for reading my bog and be sure and read my most recent blog to see what is new in my life.

July 17, 2021 Posted by | zoom | , , , , | Leave a comment

Sunday and a little Susan time at Starbuck’s

Well it is a beautiful Sunday and I get some Susan time. yes, I basically get 4 partial days a week right now, Monday evening for our Zoom meeting, Wednesday evening for dinner, Saturday afternoon and evening and Sunday afternoon and evening. Yes, I do have a lot more time on my hands now and I am trying to fill it and take my mind off my mom’s passing away. Some is yard work something I have wanted to do for a few years and hadn’t gotten to and yes Susan time as it relaxes me and takes my mind off of things in my life.

It was about 1pm when I started getting ready and yes today, I did a little different look, the purple eye shadow and a bright red lipstick. My plans were simple a drive along the river, Starbuck’s and maybe stopping and getting dinner so I figured I would rock the bright red lopstick today. I was already a little after 2 and walked out to my car and was on my way. I drove up to Beacon Rock state park just to check things out, this was one of my favorite places to go hiking years ago, my friends and I would go here a few times a year although I haven’t been up here in probably 10 years. It is nice as it is only about 50 minutes from my house. Now I didn’t get out of my car as in Washington you need a permit to park at a state park or pay for it and as I was just here to check it out, I figured it wasn’t worth it after all this was just to take a drive. I left here and was planning on going to Starbuck’s from here and decided to go to the one at Cascade station as it is on my way home but mostly it is because they have a lot of outside tables, 3 out front and 10 on the side patio which I like as it is almost always out of the sine and sun so very pleasant to sit outside.

I got there just before 4 and parked out front, 2 of the 3 tables by the door were taken and at least half the tables on the patio, today must have been lady’s day. There was 1 man by himself, 3 couples and the rest were ladies, by themselves or in groups and the ages were from probably high school to seniors. I got my computer and went in, this one does not have a drive through so they are always busy inside so I had to stand in line behind 3 other small groups and thinking I hope they don’t take the table I want outside, there is 2 right outside the door on the patio so in the shade of the building instead of under an umbrella. I got my drink and the table was still open so I set my computer up and got a couple pictures at the table when I felt no one was looking.

Now this is on a busy street and there is a lot of shopping here so lots of people walk by and yes, a lot of people go in and get a drink, this is a real busy Starbucks so good for people watching. I started off by finishing my blog from yesterday and got it posted. I also took some time and caught up on some e-mails, it was just a relaxing afternoon. I stayed here a couple hours till a little after 6 before I got hungry and decided to walk over to Panda Express which is just across the driveway and they have an outside eating area also although most are in the sunshine. They were also busy so I walked in and waited in line. I got my food and went outside and there were still a few tables and one was partially behind a tree so I sat at that table and was mostly in the shade. I sat and had a nice dinner, now again years ago when I first started going out, I would never have thought of sitting outside in full view of everyone but now I don’t even think about it.

It was about 6:30 when I finished and walked back down the street to my car. It was a wonderful day. I got home about 7 and watched a Christmas movie I taped off Hallmark today, A Nashville Christmas Carol, yes, I am watching Christmas movies again. Now I am looking forward to Monday nights Zoom meeting and this Wednesday’s dinner. Stay safe and be happy with yourself and find what makes you happy.

Thanks for reading my blog and be sure and read my most recent blog to see what is new in my life.

July 12, 2021 Posted by | Starbucks, Susan Time | , , , , | 2 Comments

Saturday Susan time after a long, stressful and emotional week

Well it is Saturday and I am really looking forward to some Susan time after this past week. Wednesday was my mom’s funeral and it was a really emotional time. she was in the Navy so she was laid to rest right beside my dad with the full military honors. Now if you have never seen one you should as they do an awesome job, 6 members of the military from each branch bring the coffin out and place it in front. Then they do the 21-gun salute, play taps, very emotional and then the remove the flag from the coffin and do the folding of it and then the presentation of the flag to the family, in this case my brother and me. The other thing is this kind of made it final, she passed away almost a month ago but tis day it seemed so final as it leaves a hole in your life, I will miss her a lot. Well as I said it is Saturday and I had some yard work to do this morning before it got to hot so it wasn’t till after I ate lunch that I started getting ready.

I took my time as I wanted a look that could go from day to evening just in case I decided later to go to the Escape for dinner. My main plan was my weekly grocery shopping and then to Starbucks to work on last Monday’s blog, yes with the busy week I am way behind. I was all ready by a little after 2 pm so it was off to Fred Meyers for shopping. Now I have been parking my car in my driveway so I just walked out the front door and went to my car. I got to Fred Meyers and went in to shop. I only spent about 30 minutes here and then was on my way home again. I got home and just parked in my driveway and got my groceries out and walked into my house like anyone else would. Years ago I had to park in the garage and make sure no one was outside when I cam or went. Now I didn’t see any of my neighbors out but the I really wasn’t looking for them. I put my groceries away and then grabbed my computer and I was off to Starbucks.

It was about 3:30 when I got to the Starbuck’s by my house and went in. Now, they have 5 tables out front and 4 of them were taken and no one sitting inside so I had a decision to make on where to sit. I really wanted to sit outside with the other people but it was kind of windy out. Now it is not like I am going to be talking with them but just nice to be around the other people. I got my drink and the one table was still open outside so I went out and sat down. The far table had a lady reading a book at it, the next table had a young man and woman at, the next table had 2 ladies at it, then my table and the table behind me had a family at, man and woman and 2 kids.

I got out my computer and wrote my blog from Mondays Zoom meeting and posted it. now I had some e-mails to catch up on, both Susan and my male side. Yes, I have separate accounts and logins on my computer so I don’t cross my male self with my female self. Now it was going through pictures from this past week. I use OneDrive mostly for Susan but I also have a male account also and one of the wonderful things about OneDrive is you can share folders. I created a family folder and in that I put the folder with all my dad’s pictures in it, did the same for my mom and then general pictures folder that I have been scanning in family pictures into. Once I had all the pictures in there it was time to share them with my family. Most of my mom’s family is back in the Midwest and my dad’s family is in Florida and with the distance and their ages they didn’t make it out so this is a way they can see it. yes, I did wonder what they would think if they knew it was Susan doing this and e-mailing them.

Now it was nice out today about 85 but, in the shade, it was perfect except for the wind, I did sit facing the wind so it wouldn’t mess up my hair as bad. I did have to push the hair out of my face a few times. It was a very relaxing day and just what I needed. By about 5:30 I was the only one sitting outside as the rest had left but I didn’t feel like moving all my stuff inside and the wind had died down a little. I checked my e-mail and saw Lauri posted she was going to the Escape tonight and a few others posted they would be there also so I decided I would go for a little while as I needed to get dinner anyway. It was about 6pm when I saw Lynn post her and Jan were getting ready and going to be there. Now I thought about it and decided I needed to go home and change as I was pretty casual today so a little after 6, I left for home to freshen up.

I got home and freshened up my makeup, just a little darker on the eye shadow and a little more eye liner. Now it was time to change, black panty hose, black skirt and a maroon top and of course my 3″ ankle boots. Brushed out my hair and I was ready to go by 6:30. I walked out my front door and walked t my car in the driveway. My next-door neighbor was working in his yard, not sure if he noticed me but we have talked several times the last few days as I have also been doing some work in my front yard. I know his wife knows so pretty sure he does also as probably most if not all of my neighbors.

I got to the Escape just before 7 and this week I did not luck out so I had to park on the street about a half block away and walk back. As I walked down the street a man passed by me on a bike and said hi so I said hi back. I got inside and ordered my dinner and sat down at a table closer to the bar well more accurately a little farther from the speakers as it gets loud in here when they start karaoke which now starts at 7:30 instead of 9:30. Well Michelle from Gresham came over and joined me looks like she got here before me this week and saw me come in. she had already eaten so we talked a little as I ate. It was about 7:45 when Jan & Lynn showed up so we had 4 at our table, yes, they got rid of the big, long tables that sat 10 and put small tables in with 4 chairs for Covid. It was a little after 8 when Lauri showed up so she pulled another chair over and we got cozy. Now you may ask why I listed Michelle from Gresham and that is because we had another Michelle from Long View show up tonight a few minutes later. I met her once before at least 1 ½ years ago but good to see her again. Yes, we use to list the Michelle’s from where they were as at 1 time, we had 7 girls in our group named Michelle and there were times we could have 5 of them out at an event. I think Michelle was our most popular name in the group at one time.

A little after 9 Renee showed up, she is one of our newer members, well she has been a member for a little while but Monday was her first Zoom meeting where she met people and she came out tonight to meet us. It was great to meet her in person and get to know her a little which was hard as I said with karaoke it was loud and hard to hear unless you were right next to the person. About 9:30 Laura M showed up with her girlfriend, it was great to see her again also. It is still hard to think some of these girls I have not seen for more than 1 ½ years because of the Covid shutdowns, it is so wonderful we are getting back to normal. Now again I had planned on just getting dinner and staying long enough to see who came but in the end again this week it was after 11:30 when I said my goodbyes and left. It was a fun evening. Now I am looking forward to some Susan time Sunday and our zoom meeting on Monday, yes right now I am getting 4 days a week and 3 right in a row.

Stay safe and be happy and thanks for reading my blog, a little longer then normal and be sure and read my most recent blog to see what is new in my life.

July 11, 2021 Posted by | Escape Bar & Grill, friends, Starbucks | , , , , | 1 Comment

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