Susanmillers Blog

My life as a heterosexual crossdresser.

Long busy week but made it to Starbucks for a break.

Well it has been a long and busy week for my male self, early mornings and late nights made for little sleep so by tonight I was ready for some time for Susan to go out and relax. It still amazes me that no matter how busy or stressed out I get just a few hours as Susan and I everything is calm and peaceful again. even tonight I was rushing to get ready as I did not get home till 6 pm and to be to the Starbucks I go to I need to leave my house by 6:45, well didn’t quite make that but was out by 7 so not bad for a complete transformation. The only thing I forgot was to throw my cell phone in my purse not that I get that many calls. It is amazing that when you are running late the amount of traffic and red lights you hit. Any way I made it out and now I am relaxing at my favorite Starbuck’s.

They are not as busy this week as last week, not sure if it is because I am here on Thursday night and last week was Wednesday but either way always nice to be here and people watch while working on my computer. Starbuck’s really is a nice place to go as you get such a wide range of people coming here and the fact they have Wi-Fi so you can surf the internet is wonderful. It is funny as a guy I never went to Starbuck’s still doesn’t, but as Susan I so enjoy it. The fact it is such a laid back place is wonderful.

Well this week’s plans are the same, Friday night I will be out with my friends again at the P-Club. It is always so much fun to get together with everyone and have fun. Wilma is back in town and hopefully will make it out with us this week. It will be great to see her again and catch up on what she has been doing; you know a little girl talk.

I had hoped to get Saturday off but couldn’t work it out. Seems one of the local stores, Nordstrom’s is having a class at one of their stores on male to female and drag queen makeup. It is in one of their rooms and cost is only $35 and then after you get a $35 credit at the MAC counter. How cool is that and since I use MAC foundation that would have been perfect but I have to work so I miss out on this, I hope they will do it again and maybe have a little more notice next time. Several of the girls from our group are going so I hope they can give me some tips they learn. Some of the girls are talking about lunch and shopping afterwards. That would be so much fun. I think I may try to plan a shopping trip in the not too distant future as Susan can always use some knew outfits, plus even if I don’t buy anything it is still fun to be out.

I also would like to maybe go out to dinner or a movie, I have talked with Peggy and Barb both about this and they also think it is a good idea so I may work that in to my week even though it may mean missing Starbuck’s one week but I think I can live with that. I think doing new things really is important as it keeps things new and exciting. It also get us as a group out more in the public eye and lets them see there is no difference between us and them other than how we dress. The more we get out the more we will be accepted I hope.

Well it is slowing down here now and only a few people here, they still have customers coming in and getting drinks but they are all to go. I must sign off as I have a bunch of e-mails to get to. I also need to do some grocery shopping which I have been putting off so what better way to end my night that at a grocery store.

Have a great rest of the week.

June 30, 2011 Posted by | Starbucks | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Friday night out with my friends.

Well it was another fabulous Friday night out with my friends. I was running a little late and didn’t get to the P-Club till about 7:45. Cassandra and Melissa were the only two there so far so I wasn’t as late as I thought. The 3 of us started talking and wondered how many would show up after last week being such a big turnout. Soon others started to show up. Chris and Roxy showed up, Chris was worried about his truck as he flies remote controlled air planes and had two in his truck Cass and I had got there early enough to park right outside the windows so we went out and moved our cars forward so Chris could park where he could keep an eye on his truck. Now these planes he flies are big about 4 feet long with a 6 foot wingspan.

While we were outside a new T-girl walked up to me and introduced herself as Carrie, turns out she was in town from California and had read my blog and thought she would come down and spend the night with our group, Carrie if you are reading this I did not get your message and have no way to get a hold of you. To the right of my blog are links to my yahoo profile and face book page so you can get a hold of me there. Well we all went back inside and I introduced Carrie around, by now more had shown up and we were now had 3 tables. Carrie and I sat at one of the tables and started talking. We had such a nice conversation.

Danielle also showed up, she is not a member of the group either as she is only in town for a couple months working on research for her degree but while she is here she is living full time. She is also very passable; I really don’t think you would be able to read her unless you really got a close look at her for a long time. She joined Carrie and I and we continued our girl talk, makeup, fashion all the important things. It really was a nice time.

Fia another T-girl who is a member of the group came over and also joined our little table. Fia usually hoes out during the day as it is hard for her to get out at night, but tonight she made it. It was last October when she came out with the group and that is when I met her, turns out my blog is good for this as I can go back to old post when I need to jog this old blondes memory. We all sat and ate and talked and I got to catch up with Fia and get to know Carrie and Danielle better. A really fun time and all such awesome girls.

Jan and Lynn showed up so it was now time for shuffle board. Carrie was my partner and we played Jan and Lynn. Now the shuffle board table really needs to be redone as parts were very slow and some very fast so it was really inconsistent and hard to judge how hard to push the puck to get it down to score without going off the end. This was Carries first time playing and she did great. We ended up winning our first game.

The next game we played Melissa and Heather, Heather was at my end of the table so we through against each other. Now in shuffle board you play to 21 and usually if you can score 4 or 5 on a throw you did really well. I had two throws that I scored an 11 on and I will be glad to tell all about it. As I said the table was hard to play on and I had left all 4 of my throws on, they were all 1 point shots for a total of 4. Heather had her last shot and hit one of mine and I thought it was going off the end but it stopped just short hanging off the back end in the 3 point section, now if they hang off without falling off you get 5 extra points so that became and 8 plus my other 3 for 11 so really Heather scored it for us. Carrie and I also won that game thanks to my 11. The 4 of us decided to play again and this game Melissa and Heather jumped out to an 11 to 0 lead. I knew we had to score some points so this is when I dug down deep and scored my second 11 of the night to tie the game up. To keep this short just re read the above from the first game because believe it or know Heather once again pushed one of mine to hang on the edge giving me the 11. I scored it twice and both times it was because of Heather, Thanks girl for the help. This game was closer but we still won in the end.

The next game Carrie and I played Cassandra and Char. Cassandra is so competitive and good at everything so that is the whole goal of the night, to be able to win against her. The game was so close, we would go ahead and they would tie it up, they would go ahead and we would tie it up. I think the biggest lead at any time was 3. It came down to the last shot and we were ahead 20 to 19, we needed 1 point they needed 2 to win. I had the lead point with 2 and Char had last shot. All she had to do was push mine off or beat it. Char missed and Carrie and I won, we won 4 in a row and quit undefeated for the night.

Barb was also there and we spent some time talking. We have talked about maybe doing smaller outings 2 to 5 girls, shopping, movies, dinner or anything new. It really is fun to spend the night out with all my friends but there is an appeal other outings of a smaller nature. Like my Starbuck’s outing, just your normal everyday type of activity. Barb came to Starbucks with me once, Peggy a few time and Melissa several time. Small groups here are very easy to do. I really think that is why I so enjoy going to Starbuck’s as it is just a normal everyday activity that any woman would do.

As the evening was coming to a close Heather and I got a chance to talk. She is a GG that has come out with the group many times and just today joined the group. She is very nice and I enjoyed getting to know her better. It is so wonderful to have such great friends, both TG and GG in the group. This group and all my awesome friends I have made in the group really have shaped who Susan is. I honestly believe I would not be who I am today without their love and support. You are all so awesome and my best friends.

Well this next week the only nights I have open are Wednesday and Thursday for Starbuck’s and Wednesday looks the best. Thanks for ereading and have a great week.

June 25, 2011 Posted by | P-Club | , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Why spend the time and effort for such a short time out as Susan.

Well it has been a really busy week again and it turns out tonight was my only chance to get out to Starbucks for a couple hours. I was thinking earlier about why even with being so busy it is so important to me to be able to find time to be Susan. I guess when you think about it, it does seem silly. I start getting ready no later than 5:30 so I can be to Starbucks by 7 or slightly past. I can only stay till 9 as that is when they close then drive home and change back and remove my makeup so I can be in bed by 10. I guess if you just look at the time and effort involved for that 2 hours most people would not do it but then I am not most people.

I love the whole experience from the time spent getting ready and even the time removing the makeup for bed. There is something fun and relaxing about the whole thing for me. I was chatting with a girl online and she could not understand how I found it fun. In her words if you had to do it every day you would look at it different. She probably has a point but I pointed out that I only become Susan twice a week with the exception of Diva Las Vegas. Now you can’t compare us equal as most woman start wearing makeup in their early teens and they probably have done their makeup every day since. Now for me it is only twice a week so I have not done my make up enough for the fun to wear off, plus I do my makeup because I want to not because I feel I have too. But more than that it is what I like and it is just that simple.

I have a friend that goes to the gym 4 nights a week. It is a 10 minute drive for her to get there and she spends about an hour and a half there then has to shower afterwards and then drive home. It is something she likes to do. She likes to work out and she also enjoys the time out of the house. There really is no different. Everyone has things they like to do it really is that simple for me. The nights I go out as Susan when I get home I am so relaxed and I sleep so well on those nights. I can’t tell you how relaxing it is to step outside your regular life and put it all aside for even a few hours. While I am Susan I forget all about my male life, work family and anything else that my male side deals with just stops and does not exist. I can only imagine how calm and relaxed the world would be if everyone could put their life aside for a few hours every week.

Well as I said I am at Starbuck’s tonight and they are really busy. Strange as when I got here there were only a few cars but inside they were packed, I guess most walked as it is pretty nice outside. The only table was way in the back corner so it is a little harder to people watch tonight. I can’t really see the front door but I do get a good look out the window which looks out on a busy corner, lots of cars and even people walking by so I can watch some.

Any way while I was standing in line the one girl making the drinks asked me if I wanted my usual and told me I could go sit down so I got to bypass the whole line which was nice. I guess the fact I come here all the time has its advantages. When she called my drink I went to get it and pay for it and she told me not to worry about it which also was very nice. I had the money in my hand so just put it in the tip cup for them. All the girls here have always treated me great so I always like to leave a tip. Now don’t get me wrong I don’t tip just to tip but when you are treated great and have great service then a tip is well deserved.

I have been here over an hour and all the tables are still full and I think they are all the same people who were here when I got here with the exception of the couple at the next table they came in about 30 minutes ago. It is good to see them busy as I have been here on night when they had no one here.

Well I must be getting to other things before they close. I will leave you with my advice to a happy life. Find something you really enjoy and then make it a part of your life. Doing something you love regular is the best way to stay happy. The days leading up to it are filled with anticipation and then you have the fun of doing it and afterward you have the memory of it so if you do something fun every week it is always in your thoughts and that will put a smile on your face. Your stress will go down which will make you feel better, look better and everyone around you will wonder why you are so happy. Feel free to share this tip with your family and friends as the best advice is always free. Tonight is not even over and I am already looking forward to Friday night when I will once again be out with all my wonderful friends.

Thanks for stopping by and reading.

June 22, 2011 Posted by | Advice and tips, Starbucks | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Awesome Friday night, 2 Birthday’s and close to 50 of our group showed up.

Well the day started off good as the weather was fantastic. Clear blue skies and about 75 degrees out and after all the cool rainy weather we were all ready for it. So as I was deciding what to wear and looking out at the sun it was an easy choice, my white skirt and purple top. Well I got to the P-club at 7:30 and Melissa was the only one there and she had 2 fabulous looking cakes and a bunch of balloons for the birthday girl.

I joined her and we talked and wondered how many would show up, now normally we have a few there between 7:30 and 8:30 and then the others start showing up but on this particular Friday night they started to show up by 7:45 and I bet by 8 we had 25 from our group there. Tonight I will refer to our group instead of T-Girls because this was also our GG night where we try to get as many wives, girlfriend, friends of the T-girls to come out and join us. Around 9:30 I tried to count how many we had there and as we were spread over the whole place it was hard but I counted 43 and I am sure I missed some plus a few more showed up later so I know we had at least 50 there at one point or another during the evening. It was great to see so many out as we wanted a big turn out as it was Peggy’s birthday hence the cake and balloons. Well as it turns out it was also Siobhan birthday so we got to celebrate two birthdays and yes their birthdays were Friday June 17.

We had several new people there. One was a new member of our group and one was just a T-girl who had heard we met at the P-Club on Friday nights and came out to join us, I hope she will join the group. Heather also brought her Sister Kristen. Heather is Melissa friend and has been coming out with us more and more, by the way Melissa, Heather and Kristen are all GG’s. You all rock for supporting us. We also had a few that have not been out for a while, Danielle who is in town for a few months, Mandie and Jamie who have not been out for a while and Nadine and Wendy, now Nadine and Wendy did come out a couple weeks ago but Wendy was in boy mode but tonight Wendy was there. It was so great to see and talk to them again.

Diane was in town, she is one of our members who lives in North Carolina now but still comes to Portland once a month for business and always comes out with the group so it was great to see her again. She and I played partners in shuffle board and we did awesome. We won four games in a row, in one of the games Diane scored 12 on one turn and the next game I scored 13 on one turn which is awesome as normally if you score 5 or 6 it is a great turn. Well after fourth game we took break so we were undefeated for the night.

Later on we got Peggy and Siobhan together and got some pictures of them as they were the birthday girls and the whole group sang happy birthday to them, nothing says party like 40+ T-girls all singing happy birthday you could hear us through the whole place. Then it was time to cut the cake. The cake was awesome, big thanks to Melissa for baking them. Now the good thing was with so many of us there the pieces were small so all us girls could have a small piece.

After wards we got all the GG’s together, now normally GG refers to genetic girl but in this case we also included genetic guys as we had 3 of our male admirers there. Now I am going to make my best guess at the name of all of them but again with so many I am sorry if I miss someone or worse get a name wrong but after all I am blonde. We had Peggy, Melissa, Heather, Kristen, Kate, Nadine, Darla, Penelope, Rita, Lynn, Bob, Dan & Jim. I know I missed someone as I think I counted 15 GG’s there. It is so great that they come out and not only support our group but actually enjoy coming out with us, how cool is that. They are all so awesome and we love them all.

There were 3 college girls who came to the P-Club last night. They had never been there before but stopped in. They spent most of the time they were there with our group, they thought we were great. They all really loved Diane as they were always with her. We even taught them how to play shuffle board and of course got some pictures. They were so awesome and we had a great time.

Later on as the night wound down and people started to leave I was finally able to sit as we had so many of our group there not everyone could sit if you wanted to stay with the group. This was nice as I got a chance to talk to Robin and Kate as they were at the same table, Kate is Robin’s wife and comes out with her every once in a while. Penelope also was by the table so we all just talked for a while and had a good time. Jamie came over and joined us also. Jamie and I talked about Diva Las Vegas and how much fun I had. I tried to talk her into going but she still has two more years of school so she can’t make it next year but maybe in a few years she can go. Of course once I sat down then I really started to get tired but was having too much fun to let a little sleepiness get in the way.

The whole night was so much fun and we were all sad to see it come to an end. Even Peggy stayed till after 1 am which is late for her but it was her birthday so why not stay and have fun. Well it was finally time to call it a night and we all wished Peggy a happy Birthday one last time and then we all headed home. What a super fun night

June 18, 2011 Posted by | P-Club | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Beautiful night at Starbucks

Well it has been such a busy week for me that this is the first chance I have had to get on my blog so this post will cover both Friday night and tonight. I did make it out last Friday with my friends but did not have any time to get on the computer and blog about. I had to be up early so I only planed on staying out till 11:30 so I could be home in bed by midnight; well we all know how well that worked out.

I got there at 7:30 and soon others started to show up. We had a good turn out as normal for a Friday night. Melissa showed up and brought her friend Heather and they are both so much fun. We played partners at shuffle board and Heather was my partner. The game was really close but in the end we lost to Melissa and her partner but it was such a fun time.

Later on as it was getting close to time for me to leave Cassandra and I decided to play a game of shuffle board against each other no partners. We were just getting ready to start when 2 guys came over and asked if they could play, their names were Neil and Guy. They were pretty cool and had no problems with playing against T-Girls even when we won the first game. We had just finished the first game when 2 GG’s came over; one was Neil’s wife and the other I think was Guy’s girlfriend, her name was Gina. Wow amazed I can remember their names. They were so nice and thought it was great we beat them at shuffle board. The second game was a lot closer and in the end they won on the last shot. It was a fun time.

After the game they thanked us for the game. Gina and I started talking and we must have talked for 20 minutes, mostly about our group and why we dress. She was totally cool with it though. Well after she left I checked the time and it was after 1 am, so much for my plan to be home early. I got to bed about 2 am and up at 6:30 so it was a really short night.

Well let’s move forward to Thursday night now. I am out at Starbuck’s and Melissa showed up which is always nice as it is so much more fun to have someone else with you. She is working on a blanket for her mom; yes she is knitting a blanket. It is a really nice time talking to her and watching her knit.

The day turned out really nice and sunny which is such a change and allowed me to wear some summer outfits, white Capri pants and a cute top. The only bad part is the Starbucks I go to faces the sun set so I either have the sun in my eyes or I sit the other way and then it shines on my computer and I can’t see the screen so I sit facing the sun plus that way I can also see the door and who comes in and goes out.

Tomorrow night Friday the group will be out again at the P-Club. We should have a good turn out as one of our members is having a birthday so we are doing a party for her. It is also our GG night where we try to get non transgender people there. It should be a great night. I will post again this weekend.

Thanks for stopping by.

June 16, 2011 Posted by | Starbucks | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Relaxing night at Starbucks

Well it has been another long and busy week and I was not even sure I would make it out. It seems the really busy weeks are the weeks I really need my time as Susan as it so relaxes me. It is strange as I have tried to explain this to people and for the most part those who do not dress have a hard time understanding this. Probably the biggest question I get is how I can be relaxed going out dressed as Susan. They all seem to think my feelings would be more excitement or fear not a calm relaxed feeling. Now I will admit then when I first started going out there was a lot of fear and excitement and it was such a rush. Now there are still time I feel these things too but there is something so calming about spending time as Susan. I really think it is the whole experience of being Susan from the doing my makeup, selecting my outfit and even when I get home and have to wash all traces of Susan away. I just really enjoy the whole experience.

Well as I said it has been a busy week and I didn’t get home till 6 pm so I was rushed which is something that takes a little away from the evening. I managed to get showered and ready in under an hour so I was at Starbucks by 7:10 which really amazed me, now I will admit that with the nice weather and bright sun shine I did go more natural with my makeup especially on my eyes so this saved a little time.

When I got to Starbucks they were not really busy which made it easy to get a table. Most of the customers are sitting outside at the tables and I really thought about sitting out there but the battery life for my computer is about an hour. It is an older computer and not the best so I really need to be able to plug it in. It would be so fun to sit outside in the sun shine. It really is quiet inside only 3 of us; everyone else is outside or getting drinks to go but still a good night out.

I have been able to catch up on all my e-mails and even been chatting with a couple friends on line. Not in a chat room just on yahoo and face book. I tried a chat room a few weeks back and this girl just couldn’t keep up. It was kind of funny as I had my web cam going and I think that attracts everyone because in wasn’t in the chat room 5 minutes and I had about 15 private chats going on plus the chat room. I just couldn’t keep up and what was worse I would start to answer one message when another would pop up and I would end up sending the reply to the wrong person. I have friends that can juggle multiple chats at once but not this girl.

I still have a couple really busy weeks ahead of me so Susan time will be so needed. I will be out tomorrow night with my friends as I try never to miss that and next week it looks like the only night I may be able to make Starbuck’s is Tuesday night. So at this point that is my plan.

I was checking the Diva Las Vegas web page and they are almost done taking pictures from this past year and then there are several weeks where those who attended can view and ask for any pictures they are in to be removed. I think they will post for everyone to see around the first of August. There really are some great pictures. If you have ever thought about going you should check out their web page and look at past years pictures. It really is an awesome time if you are looking for a fun vacation.

June 9, 2011 Posted by | Starbucks | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Friday night with my Friends.

Well it has been such a busy week and I have put in some long hours I so needed a night out with girl friends. I have been looking forward to it all week and I think that is what kept me going through the week, having something fun and that I love to look forward too. I really think everyone needs something in their life that they love and can look forward to on a regular basis.

Well it turned out that this weekend is going to be our nicest as far as weather this year so far. High 70’s on Friday and 80 on Saturday and Sunday so for the first time this year I did not even think about wearing something that would keep me warm and taking a coat. I was ready to leave for the P-Club by 7 so I was going to be early which is okay as I am to the point I really don’t care if I am the first one there or not, any way I checked my cell phone and Cassandra had sent me a text that her and Melissa had got out early and would be to the P-Club by 7 so suddenly I felt like I was running late even though I wasn’t. I was out the door and luckily none of my neighbors were home so I was able to leave with no problems. Nice days are always tough because everyone wants to be outside. It only takes me 15 to 20 minutes to get to the P-Club which is nice.

Cassandra and Melissa were already there and were having dinner so as I was hungry I also got something to eat and joined them. The three of us sat and talked while we ate. It was a really nice time and they really do have good food even though I order the same thing most times; well actually there are 2 items I will order. They are things I can eat without messing up my lipstick to bad and I can eat ladylike. They do have some hot wings that look and smell so good, Chris orders them when he joins us there but they are so messy Susan could never have them; maybe I should go one night as my male self so I could eat the wings. No that would never work as I am not willing to give up a night out as Susan for hot wings as I can always get hot wings on a non Susan night.

Well it was just the 3 of us till about 8 pm when others finally started to show up. Siobhan made it again this week so of course we had to get more pictures and for the first time this year the weather was sunny and warm so we went out front of the P-Club and took some picture. Well turns out after only a hand full of pictures my batteries went dead, I was sure I had more in my purse but it turns out I did not so I only got a few. It is strange how much different pictures look when you can take them outside in natural light. I think the pictures came out good I just need to learn to pose better; I still think I look stiff when I am in a picture by myself.

We had a really good turnout again about 25 of our group was there. Even Wendy (in guy mode) and Nadine showed up. They have not been out with the group in almost a year or more so it was so and such a surprise to see them. They are so awesome and always fun so I really enjoyed talking with them again. I think they are planning on coming out with the group in 2 weeks for Peggy’s birthday party.

Again our group was most of the business at the P-club till later. For a while if we had not been there, there would have only been 3 people there. I talked to Nicole the bar tender about this and she said it was because it was so nice that people were out enjoying the weather. I think she was right because by 11 or so people started to show up and they got busy.

Melissa and I played shuffle board against Barb and Amy. It was a good close game and either team could have won but in the end Melissa and I scored to win. Some of our group played pool and danced and even Cassandra and Wendy played ping pong. The P-club really is a nice place to go as they have so much to do and the staff there is just awesome. If you live in Portland or are just visiting and want a fun place to go you should check them out. They are located at 5262 N. Lombard.

Well it was a great night and we all had so much fun but as always the night came to an end. It was about 1:45 when we left. It was still nice outside. Well I hope to get out again this week to Starbuck but at this point I can’t say for sure, but if I do it will be Wednesday or Thursday night as this week will be just as busy as last week. Take care and thanks for reading.

June 4, 2011 Posted by | P-Club | , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Midweek outing as Susan

Well it is a busy week for me again but I found time to get out Tuesday to Starbucks. I really think the busier I am the more I want and need to have time out as Susan. It really does relax me even if I only get out for a couple hours. Any way I try to be ready to leave my house by 6:45 as it takes about 15 minutes to get to the Starbucks I go to but I was ahead of schedule and was all ready by 6:30 so I was going to be out earlier at least I thought. I always look out my front window just before I leave to make sure it is clear and wouldn’t you know it my neighbor got home just as I was ready to leave so I had to wait for her to go inside. Well the neighbors have kids and so they don’t smoke in the house so they stood out front by the end of the drive smoking so I had to wait. 20 minutes later they finally were done and went inside so I could leave. I know as the weather gets better this will happen more and it will become harder to get out.

I got to Starbucks a little after 7 and there were so many cars there I had to park at the end of the building so I figured they would be really busy inside, they were busy but there were still tables to sit at. Melissa met me there she actually walked in right behind me. I so enjoy my time at Starbuck playing on my computer but it really is a lot nicer to have someone else there with you. Turns out Melissa and I just talked for the whole time and I really did very little on my computer. It was a fun night.

Well my next night out will be Friday again with my friends at the P-Club. Always an awesome time so I will post again this weekend.

June 1, 2011 Posted by | Starbucks | , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment


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