Susanmillers Blog

My life as a heterosexual crossdresser.

Sunday at Starbucks for a couple hours

Okay it is Sunday late afternoon and I have a few hours free. As I mentioned in my last blog I bought a corset and they recommend you wear it a couple hours at a time for the first few times you wear it so I was going to wear it a little today and as I also need to write my blog well you guessed it. Sounds like I will be going to Starbucks for a couple hours. I seem to be getting out more on Sundays evenings lately. I started getting ready at 3 with the hopes of being there by 4 as it is just a few minutes away. Now I was already except for the corset which does take a little work getting into. It was about 4:15 when I was ready to leave and yes, the corset gave me a nice figure by pulling in my tummy. I actually have a little shape.

I got to Starbucks and went in, they were busy but not like last week, there were 2 small tables by the window still open. I went and ordered to order my drink and the man at the counter remembered me by name and asked if I wanted a hot chocolate. Now it was not as cod out this week so I went with a sweetened green ice tea instead but it was nice he remembered me. I went over and set my computer up on one of the tables and went back and got my drink.

It was nice to be out if only for a few, more people kept coming in and soon all the tables were full. Now today there was one table with a group of elderly people next to me and the rest of the people here were almost all young females. Now ii almost always wear my leggings when I come here as that seems to be the most common thing the woman who come here wear and it was no exception tonight. With the exception of the table next to me all the females here tonight had on leggings so I fit right in although I am pretty sure I was the only one with a corset on underneath.

The first thing I did was to write my blog from last night which was fun night. After that I just spent some time surfing the internet. I went and got another green ice tea and a pastry, as I was on my way back to the table the girl at the next table told me how cute my boots were and I thanked her. I stayed here till 6:30 when they closed and then drove over to Burger King and went through the drive through before heading home. It was a short outing but fun and relaxing.

This week I am planning on Wednesday night dinner as we are going to Who Song and Larry’s which is always a fun time. Also planning on going to our Saturday night dinner at the City Grill.

Thanks for reading and be sure to keep up on my latest trips out on my most recent blog.

Next week I will be on vacation and plan so Susan time Shopping

January 30, 2018 Posted by | Starbucks | , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Saturday at the Escape

It is Saturday and I am going to the Escape tonight; not sure how many will be there as I know a couple girls are out of town. Okay before I start this blog I want to make a side note. Last Saturday I went to the Escape and I wore an old corset that I got at one of the clothing exchanges we had, doesn’t really fit but it did make me sit up straight and gave me great posture which I liked and I mentioned I was thinking about now buying one that actually fits. I was surprised as I got several comments, e-mails and instant messages on this topic and again surprisingly every one recommended Orchard corset so on Wednesday night I decided to check out their web page. They have a wide selection and the prices were a lot less than I expected. Well I decided to measure myself and send in and see what they recommended although I had the one I liked. Thursday, I got home from work and I had an e-mail reply from them of the one they recommended and it wasn’t the one I liked. The one they reamended was the 305 well as I looked at it I decided to order one, not the one they recommended but the one I liked as they had a purple one on sale. Well any way I ordered it Thursday night and to my surprise it was actually delivered today, 2 days later so yes, I am going to wear it tonight. It really is pretty and I guess is more designed to wear over your cloths but I think for me that would be a bit much so it will go underneath.

I started getting ready a little before 4 as I was excited to try my new corset, I got my makeup done and I started getting dressed and I knew the corset would have to be one of the last things as I can’t really bend over with it on so I put me heels on before the corset. All that was left was my dress and wig so it was time for the corset. Now I did glance at the instructions, not one of my normal things and I saw they recommended the first few times not to tighten it too much to break it in. now with the front all hooked shut it was time to lace up the back. Now this is not an easy thing to do especially as my arms are not flexible enough to reach far up my back. It took a lot more effort than I thought but it did give me a nice shape and pulled my tummy in just a little big in the hops as well I have no hips. Probably why they recommended the shorter one.

I was on my way by a little after 5 and yes, it is really hard to get into a car when you can’t bend your mid-section. Also, not as comfortable when you sit on a seat that sinks in, I would not want to drive far wearing this. It does change the way you sit, stand and walk though and that is really good. I tried a new lipstick tonight that is really more of a pink color and I liked it although red is still my favorite.

I got to the Escape about 5:30 and parked right in front of the door and went in. there were only a couple people here but this is probably the earliest I have ever gotten here. Now the one big table was reserved so I took the other one and it was a good thing I did as about 20 minutes later another big group came in and they pulled 4 of the smaller tables together for them. I ordered dinner and felt a little bad taking up such a big table when I was not sure if anyone else would show up. I caught up on some e-mails and just played on the internet. By 7:30 it was really getting busy and a couple ladies sat down at the far end of the table which was fine as I didn’t feel so bad now. Kate showed up a little before 8, I was glad to see her as it is always more fun when you have someone else with you. Somehow going to a bar by yourself is not something I am big on. Kate and I talked for a whole and we got talking about makeup. I told her one of the YouTube channel (Julia Graf) I like to watch for tips on makeup and she took a picture of my computer screen with her phone to remember it something I have done before. We had a nice time just talking.

Now one of our newer girls to the group was going to come out tonight. I met her I think at the Halloween party which was her first time out anywhere and tonight would be her first time out in public. She had a friend that was coming with her for support, that first few times out is the hardest. Well it was about 8:30 when Lee showed up with her friend, a co-worker she came out to named Anne. That is something I have never done tell a co-worker so she is ahead of me on that. Now I could see she was really nervous but she was also so happy to be out, I remember those feelings when I was first going out. I was glad she joined us. Her friend Anne was so much fun and just so happy and supportive of Lee.

Now the bad thing is Karaoke started so it was hard to talk and hear but between the songs we did our best. Now I was actually amazed how comfortable the corset was, of course being new it wasn’t laced up super tight. It does make me sit up straight and it actually gives me that little arch in the lower back females have. The only bad thing is t is thick and really keeps your midsection warm, great when it is cold out but probably not good on hot days.

Now we were talking and of course I had to ask about how Lee came out to Anne, I have often thought about who I could come out to but that is one thing I have not done. Of course, now that we were asking questions Anne asked about my breast and till she said something I hadn’t noticed but the corset had pushed some flesh up and I actually had some really nice cleavage which you can see in the picture above. I guess another bonus of the corset. That’s when I told them about the corset I had bought and was wearing. At least I know it was not noticeable I had one on, Kate also mentioned she had also noticed. Lorie showed up just before 10, seems she was here last week and I had left just before she arrived. We had a smaller group tonight but still fun and I got to know a little more about Lee and her friend Anne. Lee was also getting more relaxed as the night went on. She went up a couple times to the bar by herself and even was talking to some of the other people here. It really does get easier the more you go out.

Now normally by 10:30 I am ready to call it a night but we were having so much fun, I really do enjoy when we have girls out for the first time, makes me think back to my first times going out. Besides the bar was packed and it was hard to even move around, probably one of the busiest nights I have seen here. Any way I knew it was getting late but there was always a line at the bar. They took a break in the Karaoke and played a dance song for the group at the next table celebrating a birthday and the dance floor was packed and there were only 5 people in line at the bar so I took the opportunity to go pay my bill.

It was getting late and Lee and Anne called it a night so I was thinking I should do the same. I looked at my phone and it was almost 12:30 am, wow this is the latest I have been out in a long time. I said my goodbyes and I was out to my car, again not easy getting into the car and yes as I said I was actually pretty comfortable in the corset all night but wow getting into the car was harder and it was not easy sitting in the front seat. I do have a small car that I sink down in the seat. The other thing with a corset is it is hard to twist to look behind you, it really does limit how your midsection moves. By the time I got home I was ready to take the corset off, I have had it on for almost 8 hours, I wonder what it would be like if it was really laced up tight. Any way I took it off and picked up the box it came in and the instructions and I noticed where it talked about not lacing it too tight the first few times you wear it, it also says you should only wear it 1 to 2 hours the first times too let it get broke in, opps. Any way I am thinking now of buying the corset they recommended to me

It was a good night out. Next Saturday we are doing a dinner at the City Grill in downtown Portland which I am looking forward to. Thanks for reading and be sure and keep up with what’s new in my life on my most recent blog. By the way I would recommend Orchard Corset if you are looking for a corset.

January 28, 2018 Posted by | Escape Bar & Grill, T-girl | , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Sunday work and fun time as Susan

Well it is Sunday and I still have some work to do and of course I need to write my blog from Saturday night. Now I could and use to just do this from home but it is so much more enjoyable to go to Starbucks for a few hours and take care of it. Now I will use an hour of my time getting ready but I find going to Starbucks I have less distractions so I get more done. It was 2:30 when I started getting ready and I was at Starbucks by 3:30. Now as I pulled in I could see they were really busy, for one thing I couldn’t park right in front but I could also see all the tables along the front window were taken and there were people standing inside. Now I could have gone to another one but this one is right by my house and I figured I would at least go in and see if I could get a place to sit.

I got inside and all 6 small tables and the one big table were taken along with the chairs, all that were left was the counter along the far wall in the corner and even that 4 of the 7 seats were taken. This is the busiest I have seen this Starbucks. I ordered my drink and stood in line to wait for it wondering if one of the tables would open up which they didn’t. I got my drink and went to the far corner and sat at the counter which was fine but I can’t people watch from here. I did a little work before starting my blog. In a way it was good I was in the back corner as I had to watch a class on the computer and I don’t like sitting out in the middle with earplugs in. once that was done I started on my blog. I kept looking to see if a table opened but it seemed as soon as they did someone else sat down so it seems tonight I will be back in the corner which is okay as I am still here.

I finished my blog and went back to some of my work, I still wonder what work would think if they knew I did this at Starbuck’s as Susan. It was a little after 5 when it slowed down and a couple tables opened in the main part by the windows. Now I needed, well maybe didn’t need another hot chocolate but I wanted one so I picked up all my stuff and moved over to the table and plugged in my computer and then went and ordered another drink. I actually got a lot done tonight here, probably more then I would have at home. I really like going to Starbuck’s now, it is funny as I had never been to a Starbuck’s till the first time I went as Susan. As a matter of fact, I think I have only been in one a couple times as my male self, well if you don’t count running into one to by a gift card as a gift. Starbuck’s really is my Susan thing. I often wonder if I should come in here once as my male self and see if they recognize me but being so close to where I live not going to push it that much.

It was almost 6 before it really slowed down and there were only about 5 of us still here at tables. I got all my work done by 6 and then just figured I would surf the internet till they closed. I looked online and their web page still says 7:30 but I am sure it is 6:30 now. By now there were only a couple people here. Now like I said I do like to people watch but with so few people here I was focused on my computer. It was almost 6:30 when a man was walking by my table and stopped right by me. Now of course my first thought was why did he stop and did he know me. I looked up and sure enough he knew me, he Knew Susan. It was Nicole, she is down here in Portland for the week for work and on her way down she stopped at the Starbuck’s and she picked this one just in case I was there. What a wonderful surprise, it was great to see her. This is only the second time I have met her in male mode, the first time was the very first time I met her at Washington Square. WE talked for a few minutes but she had to get going as she needed to get to her Hotel in Portland. She will go out with the group on Wednesday but I am not able to go that night, we may get together on Tuesday night if she gets off work early enough.

Nicole left and I looked at my computer and it was 6:35, I asked what time they closed and the man there said 6:30. I started putting my computer away, it is a little early but on the bright side having them close does keep me from being out to late on a work night. The man working came over and gave me a card for a free drink because they were closing and I had to leave and apologized for it which really was not necessary but a nice gesture, so I thanked him.

On my way out, I ran into Nicole again as she had run next door really quickly to Goodwill so we talked a few more minutes in the parking lot. It was a really good night out tonight. From here I made a quick run to Burger King and went through the drive through before going home for the night. I was home by 7 so I will get to bed early tonight which I need as it has been a busy weekend and I have been up early every day so I am tired and I will get up at 4:15 Monday morning for work.

Thanks for reading and be sure to keep up with what is going on in my life on my most recent blog.

January 22, 2018 Posted by | Starbucks | , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Quiet Saturday night

It is Saturday and our group the Rose City T-girls are heading down to Salem to go out with the members down there, we do this once a month. Unfortunately, that is too far for me to go but I still want to go out so I have decided I will go to the Escape and have dinner and see if anyone else shows up. Funny I use to not go out unless I knew for sure someone else would be there. I started getting ready about 4:30 and as I did my makeup I was thinking about what I should wear tonight, I really do put a lot more thought into what I wear as Susan and how I look. Not that I don’t care as a man but I just think as a woman it is more important. I took my time doing my makeup as this is something I really enjoy. When I finished my makeup, it was time to get dressed and I had decided on my black and gold dress. I got it out of the closet and I don’t know why I moved some other things and I saw my black corset. It is not a fancy corset and is one you wear under your cloths, I actually got it when we did the last clothing exchange. I am not even sure other then try it on I have ever worn it so I decided tonight was the night.

Now I am no expert on corsets and I know or am pretty sure they have different names for the different styles, this one went just below the bust but also had shoulder straps that your arms go though. Now the bad part as I have a longer body the corset didn’t go down as far as it should so it flares out just above where my hips are. By the way I was smart enough to put my heels on first as I figured it would be hard to bend over in the corset. With the corset on I pulled on the ties and tightened it up and was able to pull it all the way closed, I guess in this way it is just a little big. Now it did pull everything in and I actually had a waist ass it pulled it in. Now I put on the dress which was a little harder as with the shoulder straps I couldn’t get my arms up all the way. This was going to be an interesting evening but I could tell it would help with my posture. All dressed now and I was ready to leave at 5:40.

Now I use to look outside and see who was out, then when it was clear I would go get in my car and then open the garage door so I could leave but not anymore. I just walked to the garage without looking out, opened the garage door and then walked to my car, I was getting in when the garage door was open, of course I didn’t see anyone. Now as I got into the car I realized how the corset limited my movement, I couldn’t just get in the same way and I found I am not very graceful getting into the car with a corset on. Not sure if this is normal as I have never watched a woman in a corset get in and out of a car but it is a new challenge for me. Now driving I found I sat up more straight which is good as I have always tended to slouch when I sit. I got to the Escape right at 6 and parked right in front. Getting out of the car was just as much of a challenge. I think it also changes the way I walk also.

I went in and sat down at the table and yes, the corset effects everything you do, walking, standing and sitting but It does make you have good posture. I was sitting straight up with my shoulders back, yes, the straps over the shoulders made me keep my shoulders back or the straps dug into them. A corset is not the most comfortable thing you will wear but it will give you good posture and a better shape.

Lindsey was working tonight, she doesn’t work here regularly but fills in when they need help and of course she remembered me by name which is always wonderful. I ordered dinner and got out my computer to catch up on e-mails and do some work while I waited to see if anyone else would show up. I also talked with a couple of the regulars that come here and I feel bad as they remember my name and I don’t remember theirs. My dinner came and it was wonderful as always of course I had their breakfast. Now they had the jukebox going and it was loud this week but most of the music that was played was good. I got caught up on my e-mails and then started doing some of my work as well as watching some of the TV so I was multi-tasking.

By about 8:30 it was getting busy and I felt bad sitting at a table that seats 8 by myself. A couple ladies came in and asked if they could sit at the table and I said sure as it was looking like I might be the only one here tonight. Karaoke started at 9 and I was finishing my work, not because I was done but because my battery was almost dead on my computer, guess it wasn’t fully charged tonight. It was also really busy now and so I sat and listened to some of the people sing karaoke. It was a good night but would have been better if others had shown up, I am not against going out by myself as I do it all the time when I go to Starbucks or shopping but it still seems a little strange to be in a bar by yourself and I would feel the same on my male side so I guess that is okay.

It was a little after 9:30 when I called it a night and yes it was just as hard getting back into my car but I did sit up straight all night long with my shoulders back which I liked. That is one thing I want to change about myself as slouching looks bad and is not good for you but I do it so easily and I really have to be thinking about it to sit up straight. Please any of my friends feel free to tell me when I slouch as I really do want to fix this.

It was about 10:15 when I got home and started the process of changing back from Susan. Now by this time I was use to the corset even though it still restricted my movement but it didn’t feel as tight as when I put it on. But when I untied it and took it off wow it did feel good and I could tell I had worn one. I am now thinking I should get one that is a little longer and just a little smaller in the waist, I could wear it more and train myself to sit up straight, I think I will look online and see what I can find. Any way it was a good night and as my battery went dead I still have work to do so maybe Sunday if I can find a little time I will go to Starbuck’s for a few hours.

Thanks for reading and be sure to see what is new on my most recent blog.

January 21, 2018 Posted by | Escape Bar & Grill, Out and about as Susan | , , , , , , , , , , | 3 Comments

Wednesday night outing

It is Wednesday and I am going to get to go out tonight for dinner with my friends. I got home and of course the most important thing was I needed a manicure. I called Dream nails and got an appointment for 5, so looking forward to this. I really love going to the nail salon. I started getting ready taking my time to enjoy it. As I got ready I had the big issue of what to wear and how to do my makeup. Normally I would wear a dress and heels to go to dinner but I am also going to the nail salon first. Well I settled on a black skirt and sweater top and my high heeled boots although I did go with the red lipstick.

I got to the nail salon just before 5 and went in. they were not busy, just 1 lady getting a pedicure. Anna was ready for me so I sat right down and she started on my nails, it is such a relaxing experience. She removed the old gel polish and got my nails ready for the for the new acrylic to fill in. She asked me if I wanted them shortened and of course I didn’t but I knew I needed to so I told her yes. It is always sad when she uses the grinder to make them shorter. She also fixed the nail I broke the corner off of and soon she was putting on the new acrylic. now she has been using a pink acrylic which gives my nails a slight pink color, it would probably be more if she put it on thicker but she does a thin layer. Now it was time for the gel polish and Anna asked if I wanted the clear again and I said no I wanted the color wedding dress which is a slight pink although with the pink acrylic is does have more of a pink color. I really do love the way my nails look with this color of course I would much rather have a bright red. Maybe in 2 weeks as I will be on vacation. Anna put the first coat on and then the second coat and yes, my nails have a slight pretty pink shade. Now I know some people have noticed but only one person has ever said anything, but a lot of the woman I work with are taking way better care of their nails and several now have pretty long acrylic nails. I guess they just don’t want a man to have better looking nails then they do. It was about 5:40 when I was all done and on my way with my pretty nails.

Now Julie had taxed me earlier and she is also going to dinner tonight so I am going to pick her up so I was on my way to her house. I got to her house a little after 6 and she was already. It was great to see her again as she had been on vacation to Australia for 3 weeks. I was looking forward to hearing all about her trip. Now there was a lot of traffic so we got downtown just before 7. We were having dinner at McMenamins tavern & pool, the group has gone here a couple times before but it will be my first time. I really like going to new places.

Melissa and Cassandra were already there. It was good to see them again. Barb also showed up so we had 5 for dinner. Now I do like the bigger group outings as it is always fun to see a lot of girls out but it is harder to talk with all and also when we are at the bars it gets loud. These Wednesday night dinners are a lot of fun as having smaller groups you can really have good conversations which all can be involved in and it is not loud so you can easily hear what is going on. It might just be to many times to bars. We ordered dinner and had a wonderful time. It really was a wonderful night out. We also talked about our Mexican cruise in October of 2018, if you have ever thought about going on a cruise be sure and check out our web page for more information.

It is amazing how fast the night went by and soon it was 9:30 which doesn’t sound that late but I get up a little after 4 am in the morning and it will be at least an hour to get home and in bed but it is so worth it to go out with my friends. Saturday most of our group will be going to Salem to go out with the girls down there, I won’t be able to make it so I will go to the Escape at least for a while for dinner and to see if anyone else stays local.

Thank for reading and be sure to keep up with what I am doing in my most recent blog.

January 18, 2018 Posted by | Dinner out, Manicure & pedicure, nail salon | , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

Wednesday dinner at Southland Whiskey Kitchen

Wednesday is here and our group is doing its Wednesday night dinner at Southland Whiskey Kitchen. I am looking forward to this as I have been here a couple times before in 2016 and early 2017 and it is a wonderful place to go for dinner, wonderful food, fair price and wonderful atmosphere. A really nice place to go for an evening out, the only bad thing is parking is not easy, but I would highly recommend them.

I started getting ready as I wanted to get there early so I would have time to find a parking spot and be there by 7. Besides I wanted to take my time and enjoy getting ready. I was all ready by 6 and on my way, I got downtown by 6:30 and luck would have it I found a parking spot about a block away just around the corner. Now it wasn’t raining but I took my umbrella just in case because I know if I don’t have it I will need it. I got there and Cassandra and kearren were already here, turns out Cassandra got here around 5. Now we do our dinners at 7 so we sat and talked and gave time for others to show up as we had a few other girls say they would be here.

Melissa showed up a little before 7 and the 4 of us sat and talked. I do like these smaller group outings as it is easier to talk with everyone. Of course a couple of the things we talked about was Diva Las Vegas and of course our Mexican Cruise in October. Diva Las Vegas is April 15 to 20th 2018 and it is so much fun. Check out their web page and think about going. The cruise is October 13 to 20th 2018 and will be so much fun. I have never done a cruise and I am really looking forward to it including flying down and back as Susan. Now this is not a transgender cruise but we do have 29 signed up to go of which about 15 are from our group the rose city t-girls here in Portland. If you have ever thought about going on a cruise this is the one.

By 7:15 we decided to order as we figured it was just us 4 for dinner. We had a wonderful time for a few hours and a great dinner. Our waitress was awesome. We really have had wonderful people wait on us and have always been treated wonderful every place we have gone. Portland really is a wonderful place to be. After dinner we looked at the desserts menu, last time we were here Cassandra got a big warm chocolate chip cookie which I was all set to have but they don’t have it anymore, kind of a let down but the good thing was I didn’t order dessert, good for me. Well Casandra did order dessert and shared it with all of us, how nice of her, Thanks Cassandra. This worked out well as we got some dessert but didn’t eat the whole thing by ourselves.

It was a nice evening out with my friends and it was sad to see it come to an end. It was a little after 9 when we left. I really do love these outings with my friends. Thanks for reading and be sure and read my most recent blog to find out what is new in Susan’s Life.

January 13, 2018 Posted by | Dinner out | , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Some Sunday Susan time

It is Sunday and it turns out I have a little time today and as I need to write my blog from Saturday evening I figured why not go to Starbucks as Susan. It was a little after 2 when I started getting ready and I was at the Starbucks by my house by a little after 3 with my computer. They were a little busier today I guess Sunday afternoons are a good time to go to Starbuck. I got my drink and sat down and got out my computer to do my blog. Now as I said this was kind of a last-minute outing and not really well planned. I figured I would have a few hours here to do my blog and some work on the computer but I forgot they are now closing at 6 on Sundays. Well that still gives me 3 hours.

I got connected to the wi-fi and opened my blog and noticed that my battery was only half charged, yes, I had used it last night at the escape and then forgot to plug it in and of course I didn’t bring the power cord. Now as I said this is close to my house, I could have run home and got the cord and been back in 5 minutes but that seemed a little strange to me. I decided to just go and see how long my battery lasted. I finished my blog and I still had a little battery left so I was just goofing off on the internet, a good way to waste some time. It was just before 5 when my computer told me I had 10% and I knew it wouldn’t be long. I wasn’t even going to make it till 6, so sad as I was not ready to go home yet. I was checking my Facebook page and I saw a post from a friend who had gone and saw the new Star Wars movie and I thought to myself, I haven’t gone to the movies in a while either male or female and I wanted to see the movie, yes, I am a big Star Wars fan. I quickly checked the times and the downtown Vancouver cinema had a 5:50 showing. I didn’t want to go to late as it is almost a 3-hour movie and I do need to get up early tomorrow. It was 5:10 now and only takes about 10 minutes to get there so it was decided. I am going to the movies.

Now I like this theater as it usually is not busy and I figured being a Sunday evening that would be the case. I was in my car and on my way. I got to the theater and there were all kinds of people leaving the theater and going to the theater and lots of cars going in and out of the parking garage. I guess everyone thought today was a good day to go to the movies. I parked and walked across the street to the theater where I had to stand in line to get my ticket. It didn’t take long and soon I was inside and again I had to stand in line to get into theater 6 where the movie was playing. Now I did feel a little out of place but not for how I was dressed but because I was by myself, not many people go to the movies alone.

Soon they let us in and it was one of the bigger theaters here, I got a seat about the middle and waited for the movie to start, being a big theater, the amount of people was small but that would not last. I had hoped by waiting so long after it came out there would not be as big of a crowed. Again, I was wrong by the time the movie started I would say it was 80% full, I did have 1 empty seat either side of me, I am thinking people left it thinking I was holding them for someone. Out of all the people as I looked around there were 2 other singles in the crowd but both were men.

Now the movie itself was good not great, there were some parts where they went for laughs and it didn’t work in the plot. Probably one of my least favorite from the Star Wars series. The movie was almost 3 hours long. It was a fun night though and that is what counts.

Thanks for reading and keep up with my most recent blog.

Have a great week!

January 9, 2018 Posted by | movies, Starbucks | , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

First Saturday of 2018 at the Escape

It is the first Saturday of 2018 and I am able to go out and meet my friends at the Escape tonight, a great way to start the new year, this is also my 1,000 blogs. I started getting ready early with the hopes of being there by 6, thing went well and I was ready to leave by 5:30, I also mixed it up and chose my long dark brown hair tonight, I was just in the mood for a change. I got to the Escape just a little before 6 and with my computer in had I went in. I always bring my computer so I can do some work as I wait for others to show up. Well Turns out Kearren was already there. It was nice as it gave us a chance to talk.

Kearren and I talked a lot about our feelings on our dressing and why we do it which I am always happy to tell people however I can only speak for myself and how I feel so in no way relate this to everyone. I always start of as it is not a sexual thing for me as so many people think that is why. Wanting to cross-dress is an expression of who you are and not who you want to have sex with. For me it is just so relaxing and calming, I get to just be myself without hiding anything and I think that is the most important thing. In my male life I always feel like I have to hide part of who I am and that can be really hard. When I am out I am not really thinking about how I am dressed or the fact I am dressed as a female and I guess the best way to explain that is when you go out are you focused on how you are dressed or on what you are doing and the people you are with. For me being out I am just being me, yes, every once in a while, I see my long hair in my face, or feel my lipstick but as for the rest of the makeup I don’t even think about it on my face as I can’t see or feel it. The other thing is it is a great way to relieve stress and any problems I am having as for a few hours I am Susan and I don’t think about work or things going on in my male side of my life. Kearren has a lot of the same feelings but she is still working through them which is hard. I have had these feelings for as long as I can remember and it took me a long time to figure out who I am and what I want in life and how Susan fits in.

Nicole also showed up tonight what a wonderful surprise. She lives up North and doesn’t get to Portland that often but it is always great when she does. Maybe one of these times we will have to try to get together and go shopping. Any way her wife and here are on vacation and she stopped here to go out with us, yes, her wife knows and is supportive. I keep hoping she will come out with Nicole sometime and meet the group. Anyway, her wife bought her a bunch of the Kiss nails we use, well I use to before I started getting my nails done. It was a trade off as I don’t have long pretty red nails when I go out but I have nice pretty nails just a little long all the time. I wrote about these nail tip in a blog a few years back. So, Nicole tried it tonight and the nails didn’t stay on, seems I left one thing out of my blog, you need clean dry nails, Nicole put them on after she had put moisturizer on so her nails were oily. If you want to use this method just before you put the nails on clean and dry them, some girls use hot water I always used a cotton ball with alcohol or polish remover. If you do this the nails will stay on. By the way Nicole loved the nails before they fell off and I think once she wears them for an evening she will always want them. It is funny as I really do love all the parts about being Susan but the long pretty nails are at the top of the list.

Cassandra showed up next also Melissa, Kate one of our new girls Victoria and her girlfriend Maria. They came to the Halloween party but I think this was here first night out in public. She also lives about an hour from Portland which makes it hard. It was nice as we had a nice sized group which is always fun although harder to talk with everyone. The bar was not really busy tonight but still a nice crowd. Karaoke started and that is fun but it also gets loud and harder to talk and that is when some of the girls start to leave. It is funny as 6 – 8 years ago we didn’t even go out till 9 or 10 and we usually closed down the bar now we go out at 6 – 7 and by 9 or 10 we are ready to call it a night. Nicole was the first to leave but she will be back in a couple weeks so that will be fun, Then Melissa and Victoria and her girlfriend left. Lorie and another girl showed up just as they were leaving, they are still our late-night girls. Some of the girls played pool and the rest of us sat and talked and listened to the Karaoke

A girl and guy came over and the girl started talking to us, well with the noise it was hard to hear her and she was hard to understand, yes Saturday night in the bar and a few drinks can do that to you but we finally figured out the guy was new in town and wanted to meet us so we invited him to sit down and he took the seat next to me. Now I talked with him for a while and he seems really nice, He moved up here from San Diego. Well it turns out he is a T-girl admirer well maybe a little more than admirer. I was suddenly aware of how I was dressed. Now tonight I wore a dress that was very nice and almost knee length and I was glad as one time I felt his hand on my leg and now I was trying to pull my dress lower. Any way he told me all about the clubs down there and well shall we say the working girls. Now I know this goes on in the Transgender community and I am probably sure some of the girls in our group play around and that is fine as I don’t judge. But as I said earlier this is not a sexual thing for me. Any way as we talked I took it upon myself to tell him about me as he thought I was fulltime and on hormones which I guess is a compliment as it means I looked good. But I told him I was not on hormones and just dressed this way a couple times a week and of course that I was not interested in men. He was fine with that although I could see he was a little disappointed. This doesn’t happen often to me and I still feel very uneasy when it does but I guess all woman deal with this at some point, just part of being a girl. But as I said while he was there talking with me I was very aware of how I was dressed. Anyway, he asked about the other girls at the table and our group and tonight was a rare night as of the girls that were here 3 were married and 5 had girlfriends, it was just Lorie and I that are single. He seemed surprised by this as he is use to the more sexual part of the Transgender community and I guess maybe we are the exception, but are group is about social aspect and getting girls to go out. Like is said I am sure this also goes on here in Portland but as our City is so accepting there really isn’t 1 club in town where all the Transgender go, we pretty much go where we want so that may b e hard for him here.

Well he talked with e and some of the other girls for about 30 minutes, seems longer before he left for the night. Now he seemed nice enough but still this is the one thing I will never get use to being Susan although I am getting better at it. I guess it is not all fun and roses being a girl. I will say so far; every time this has happened though the man understood and didn’t push it with me which is nice.

It was a fun night and it was almost 11 when I called it a night. I am hoping to make it out to Wednesday night dinner this week.

Thanks for reading, it was a little longer blog than I normally write. Be sure and keep up with my latest blog as Susan.

January 7, 2018 Posted by | Escape Bar & Grill, Out and about as Susan | 2 Comments

Badly needed trip to the nail salon.


Happy New Year’s everyone, it is hard to believe it is already 2018, seems like we were just worried about y2k (2000). I am currently sitting in Starbucks as I write this blog #999, yes, I am almost at 1,000 blogs. Now I had planned to hit 1,000 before the end of the year but well I ended up getting sick and didn’t get out last week or over the weekend. That also meant I missed getting my nails done last week hence the reason for the trip to the salon today. Today is 3 weeks since my last time getting my nails done and yes, they are on the long side but still looked pretty good till today. I learned that although 3 weeks grow out is okay the fact I have a thin layer of acrylic on my nails they do not hold up when they get too long. Today I broke a corner off the acrylic of one nail leaving a jagged edge and broke part of the actual nail on another finger. As I looked at them closer the reason was at the tips the acrylic was lifting off the natural nail. So, I am caught between getting my nails done every 2 weeks or having thicker acrylic. now I will say that Anna left my nails a little longer last time which also may have played a part. I am learning that having nice pretty nails takes work and care.

\Any way on the way home from work I called Dream nails to see if I could get in today. Anna said sure and wanted to know if I could be there at 4:30. Now I probably could have but if I got caught in traffic I would be late so I played it safe and said 5 so I had my appointment all set. It was a good thing too as I didn’t get home till 4 and still needed to get ready as Susan, I wonder from time to time what they would think if I just showed up as my male self. Well I started getting ready right away. I was all ready by 4:50 and ready to leave. Now my new neighbor, well he has lived there for about 9 months and I have only talked with him a couple times last summer was out in the street with his 2 little kids as they road their bikes in front of their home. Any way I had a nail appointment to get to so I opened the garage door and pulled out. As I turned onto the street he was only a few feet from me and he waved to me so I waved back and was on my way. I got to the nail salon just a little before 5 and went in. They were busy as there were 3 ladies getting their nails done and 4 getting pedicures including a husband and wife and one lady waiting. It took Anna about 5 minutes to finish the lady she was working on and then it was my turn.

I sat down at the table and Anna started to grind off the old gel polish and by the second finger she noticed how bad my nails were lifting. Yes, I was going to get a whole new set which meant removing all the acrylic down to my natural nails which I have not seen since last March, well 1 or 2 nails have had to be done like this but not all of them. It took a little work to remove all the old acrylic and wow my natural nails look horrible. I guess acrylic is hard on your nails, plus they are thin and week as the hard-top layer is gone. Now even with that Anna had to file the top down more to remove all the damage so the new acrylic would adhere. Finally, the nails were prepped and it was time for the acrylic. Now I really do love getting my nails done, it is so relaxing. One by one my nails started to look pretty again and soon all 10 were covered in acrylic and looked long and pretty. Anna asked me if I wanted them shortened and I said yes and with that she ground off the ends till they were short and yes shorter than the last time. I do wish I could have them longer and red but it just won’t work for me now but in 4 weeks I am going to take a week vacation and it is time I just need to use as I have been holding on to it because of my parent health but now it is getting close to the end of my work year and I need to use it. I don’t have any plans other then it will be Susan time and I am hopeful I can get a read color for the week and maybe not shorten them, that would be so awesome. I am looking forward to the fist week of February. Anna did her usual wonderful job; all the ladies here do wonderful jobs on nails. All to soon my nails were done, Anna went with just a clear top coat which was a little disappointing after 12 weeks of that pinkish color, she first use this color back on October 15, but then I thought that was fine as my brother will be in town in a little over a week and I think clear polish will be batter for that.

I left the nail salon and I was hungry so I drove to Panda Express and went in and got something to eat and even they were busy tonight, I had to stand in line. I got my food and sat down and ate like any other customer. I saw a couple people glance over at me but nothing big and for the most part the rest really paid me no attention. Soon a was done and it was time to go to the Starbucks by my house. I got there a little after 6:30 so I would have about an hour. They were also a little busy but most were to go ordered. There were only about 6 other people sitting at tables. I got a hot chocolate and sat at my table and caught up on some e-mails and then of course wrote this blog. It still amazes me that I have wrote 999 blogs about my times going out. Now years ago, I didn’t always write about my tomes out but pretty much for the last years I have been pretty good about it, sometime I combined a couple short outings into one blog but still. This means I have been out as Susan at least 999 time, that is hard to believe as 15 years ago it took all I could do just to go out for a late-night drive. It is fun though to look back at my old blogs, what I did, where I went and with who and of course some of the old pictures. To see how I have grown as Susan and become the lady I am today and of course all my wonderful friends. I would encourage everyone to at least write down some of the major event in your life as over time things become not so clear and some day we all want to look back at least for a little look.

I stayed at Starbuck till 8 when they closed, I was getting ready to leave and the one girl told me I could stay if I wanted as they had a lot of cleanup work to do. I thanked her but I had already put my computer away. I wish I knew her name as she is so nice and always remembers me, I looked and she didn’t have a name tag on. I talked to her for a few minutes as she told me they were changing their hours on the weekend, closing earlier, 7:30 on Saturdays and 6 on Sundays, then a quick trip to the gas station before heading home. It was a fun and relaxing evening. I am not sure I will get out Friday but I plan on going out Saturday night so blog 1,000 is just around the corner. Thanks for reading and keeping up on my life as Susan. Be sure and keep up on my latest outings on my most recent blog.

Have a safe and Happy New Year.

January 4, 2018 Posted by | Manicure & pedicure, nail salon | Leave a comment


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