Susanmillers Blog

My life as a heterosexual crossdresser.

Entry for May 28, 2008

Last night I had the chance to go out as Susan. A friend of mine Alice invited me down to meet up with her and some friends at Southside Speakeasy in Salem. I have been there once before on a Saturday night when it was really busy but last night it was nice and quiet. There were maybe 15 people there so it was nice to be able to just sit there and talk. Alice’s Friends were really nice and treated me like any other woman. It was a really fun night and great to get together with Alice again.

May 28, 2008 Posted by | Uncategorized | 1 Comment

Vacation comes to an end May 26, 2008

I got up this morning and was sad as I know I have to remove my nails today and go back to my male self. I really wish I could keep them always. I had made an appointment at Nails by Lily for 3pm. I left Gold Beach about 9 am and checked out of the Motel. The lady at the desk this morning seemed to not pay any attention to how I was dressed and treated me nice. The drive home was longer then I thought so I had to leave the coast and drive over to I-5 so I would make my nail appointment. I pulled in to the parking lot just a couple minutes late and went right in. I have gone to Nails by Lily before and they also have treated me well. They are busier then French Nail’s but open on Sunday. I was seated right away. There were 7 other women in there and none of them seamed to pay any attention to me. It took two hours to remove the nails well I also got a manicure as long as I was there. It was such a nice feeling that I may go back and have a manicure again some time. When I left there I still didn’t want my vacation to end so I stopped for gas and then went through the drive through at Wendy’s and got a hamburger to take home. I drove home and ate while I watched a movie. After the movie I decided for one last outing so I reapplied my makeup and drove into Portland and went to Embers. They have karaoke on Sundays so it’s not the same type of crowd so I had a couple drinks and then left after about an hour. Now I am typing this out and it is after midnight. I need to unpack and then change back and say goodbye to Susan for a while and go back to my boring male life. It was truly a great week and a wonderful vacation. I kept my nails for more then 8 ½ days, total time I had them on was just a little over 212 hours.

May 26, 2008 Posted by | Uncategorized | 5 Comments

Susans vacation last night May 24, 2008

I put my suitcase in the trunk and drove to the front office. I grabbed my purse and walked into the hotel office. The man behind the Desk greeted me by saying Good morning Miss, (I love the sound of Miss) are you checking out? I said yes and gave him my key card and room number. He asked if I enjoyed the stay and if the room was okay. I said yes. He printed me out my receipt and told me he hoped I would come back and stay with them again. It was about 11 am so I drove to the IHOP I ate at the other night and went in for breakfast. I was seated and had a good time. I was on the road by noon and drove up 101 over the Golden Gate Bridge. It was a beautiful drive and the ocean was incredible. I stopped a couple times at some view points and even stopped and checked out the Red Woods. They are so big and beautiful and I couldn’t have asked for better weather.

I made it as far as a town called Gold Beach and stopped for the night. This is a town on the southern Oregon coast. I checked into the motel and the lady at the desk treated me nice but she really looked at me and my driver’s license. I don’t think they see a whole lot of cross-dressers here. I put my stuff in my room and freshened up my makeup and then went out for dinner. I really wasn’t that hungry because all I did all day was sit in my car and drive but I wanted to go out. I found a restaurant called Nor’wester and it didn’t look real busy so I went in. I ordered a salad and a drink. The waitress seemed to pay no attention to me but a few of the other people kept looking at me. After dinner I went and took a walk on the beach bare foot and watched the sun set before coming back to my motel for the night. I am trying to make my vacation last as long as I can but I know tomorrow it will all be over and Susan will go away for awhile but it has been an incredible and fun time while it lasts.

May 24, 2008 Posted by | Uncategorized | 1 Comment

leaving San Francisco May 24, 2008

Well I am getting ready to check out of my motel and I am all dressed up and wearing my black pants and purple top and I have decided to wear my 4” heels. I was checking out the weather and it looks like the coast is going to be nice so I have decided to take an extra day and drive up the coast and maybe get a chance to walk on the beach. I called and made an appointment for tomorrow at 3 pm to have my nails removed. The nails salon I go to is open till 5 pm. I just have to make sure I make it on time. Not sure where I will stop tonight but I am thinking the southern Oregon coast. It is hard to believe that my vacation is almost over, it went so fast. If I can find an wireless internet connection tonight I will post again and let you know where I am and how my day went. Must go as I only have 15 minutes to get checked out.

May 24, 2008 Posted by | Uncategorized | 1 Comment

Last day in San Francisco May 23, 2008


I got up and all ready by 9: am. I drove out to the mall on the west side of San Francisco called Stonestown Galleria mall. The first place I went was the Bare Minerals store. I wanted to find out how much coverage this would give and if it would work on my skin to cover what needs to be covered and still look natural. The sales lady was really helpful and honest. She told me it probably would not do want I needed but gave me a sample to take home and try. I thought this was really great as she knew I probably wasn’t going to buy anything but still gave me a sample. I walked around the mall some more and found a little bakery so I went in and got an apple fritter and milk for breakfast. After that I went to Macys and looked at their cosmetics. I have found that the women who work the cosmetic counters are the friendliest and I guess it’s because they sell what we all want. One of them even asked me if I wanted to try anything on. As I past the Clinique I saw the same free gift with a purchase and as I needed some perfume I checked out their fragrances and found one I liked so I bought it and got my free gift bag. I walked around some more and went into Nordstrom’s. Again the ladies at the cosmetic counters all asked if I needed some help or if they could show me anything. It was such a great feeling I really love shopping as Susan. I left there and decided to take a drive over the Golden Gate Bridge. On the north end is a view point and I stopped and got out and looked at the bridge with all the other tourists. I took a couple pictures and then asked a lady standing near if she would take a picture of me with the bridge in the background and she did. I looked around for a few more minutes but the wind was really messing up my hair so I got back into my car and drove on down into Sausalito. This is such a nice small picturesque town I think if I were to live here this would be my first choice. It is full of little shops. I walked down on the waterfront and looked at the bay and even went into one small shop to look around. After that I drove back across the Golden Gate Bridge which if you are going south you have to pay a $5 toll which I guess is okay. I drove through the city and then back down to San Bruno to the Starbuck’s near my hotel. I am now inside with my latte and computer writing down the events of the morning and early afternoon. It is fun to sit here and people watch in such a public place as Susan. When I am done here I am going to drive down the road to the Hillsdale mall in San Mateo I was at yesterday and see if there are any other stores between here and there I can explore. If not I will just go back to the mall. Tonight I will go back to the other Starbucks I was at last night and finish up my notes on today.

Well after I left Starbucks I drove down 82 to San Mateo where the Hillsdale mall I was at yesterday. I parked in the parking garage and walked into Nordstrom’s. I looked around at their clothes some more and then went down to their cosmetic counters. To my surprise there were all kinds of young women probably high school age all getting makeovers. They also had a lot of women working the counters. They must have had some kind of special for a Friday evening. It was so crowded I couldn’t even get up by the counters to look so I walked out into the mall to look around. I looked around and went into Macys and again found the same thing at their cosmetics counters. I was a little disappointed but I was still out and that’s what mattered. I went upstairs and looked at some of their clothes for a while then back into the mall. It was really busy I guess because of being Friday night. I spent a little time in Mervyns looking at their outfits. I was only there for a little over an hour before I left. I drove back to my hotel and went to the IHOP for dinner. They weren’t really busy even for a Friday night. I sat there and had a nice relaxing meal. As I sat there I noticed it was 7 pm and I thought to myself I have had my acrylic nails on now for one full week as it was last Friday I had them done. This is the longest I have ever had them and I also realized that in less than two days I will have to have them removed and go back to my short boring boy nails. After dinner I stopped by my hotel room and freshened up my makeup before heading out for my last night in the San Francisco area. I drove back over to the other Starbucks and they were real busy and I had to park down the block and walk to get in. I like San Francisco the only bad thing is the wind never stops blowing and by the time I got in my hair was a mess again. I fixed my hair and ordered my latte. The people working at the Starbucks have been outstanding and friendly. I found a table and plugged my laptop in and am finishing up my days events. Tomorrow I have the long drive home and I just realized I lock all my male clothes up so I will have to drive home as Susan. For now I think I will sit here and finish my latte and do some other things on my computer as I people watch.

May 23, 2008 Posted by | Uncategorized | 2 Comments

another full day of shopping and funMay 22, 2008


I got ready but was a little slower today. I didn’t leave motel till after 10 am so I got to the Hillsdale mall in San Mateo about 10:30 and parked outside Sears and went in. I went right into the mall and walked around. I went through Nordstrom’s and the ladies ant the cosmetic counter asked if I needed any help. I said I was just looking. I spent too much money yesterday. I walked through the women’s department and no one even said hi to me which is unusual for Nordstrom’s. From there I went out into the mall and down to Macy\’s. I started off at the cosmetic section. Again the ladies all asked if I needed any help. A couple of the younger ladies at the Clinique counter asked if they could help me and told me about their special gift if you buy $25 worth of cosmetics. It was a nice gift so I really looked over there counter but there was nothing I really needed so I thanked them and went up to look at their clothes. Again none of the sales ladies here said hi to me not sure why. It didn’t look like they were approaching anyone. I went back into the mall and went to the Cinnabon and got a cinnamon roll and milk for breakfast. After that I walked the mall some more and went into a Claire’s boutique they had some bangle bracelets that fit and a nice ring so I bought them. On my way out I stopped at the Mac Cosmetic store. I have only seen their cosmetics in department store never as a standalone store. The two ladies working there asked if they could help me. I said I was just looking so the one showed me all the different cosmetics and told me if she could help me in anyway let her know. I looked for a while then thanked them and left. I got in my car and drove across the street to Barns & Nobel and went in. I spent a good hour in there looking around and reading. I have found that this is a good place to go when out as Susan. I left there and drove back to San Bruno to the same Starbucks I was at last night. I grabbed my laptop and went in and ordered a latte. I really just wanted to be someplace public that I could sit for awhile. I have been wearing heels no stop for the last three days mostly 2 1/2 inch so not to high but I can feel it in my feet, but I still love them. So right now I am sitting in Starbucks righting this out. It is a great way to spend an hour or two. I think I will try to find another Starbucks to go to later. It sure isn’t like Portland where if you drive a few block in any direction you run into a Starbucks. Here they are few and far between. Today has been sunny and warm and in the upper 80’s so I have had to touch up my makeup a few times but it is so worth it.

Well I left Starbucks and drove around to the other side of the shopping center to Marshals. I have never been in Marshals so I didn’t know what to expect. I parked and walked in. They are a discount store with racks of clothes that are so close together you have to turn sideways to walk between the racks and if there are other shoppers down the row you want you can’t get past them. I looked for a short while but didn’t care for the store but it was still a chance for Susan to be out. I then drove up the street to see what I could find. About a ½ mile down the road I found a Subway and decided to get dinner there. I parked and walked in. they were really busy and I had to stand in line for about ten minutes. I ordered and then sat down to eat facing the door so I could see everyone who came in and they could see me while they stood in line. I sat there and ate and was in no hurry, it was good to be out. When I was done I drove on down the street and found a Starbucks in an upscale area and made a note of where it was so I could come back. I continued on down the street and found Kohl’s. Quickly pulled in and parked and went in. I like Kohl’s and have bought several of my outfits there. I walked around in there for a good 45 minutes looking at everything from skirts, jewelry and makeup. I even found there perfume section and they had a bottle of Eternity as a tester. I love the sent so I use the tester and the smell is heavenly on me. It was after 7 pm by now so I decided to go back to the Starbuck’s I had found and see what that one was like. I parked on the street and went in. it is bigger and a lot nicer than the one I was at earlier. I ordered my latte and sat down at a table and am now on my laptop finishing my notes for today. All that is left is I might stop at a movie theater I found later on my way back to the motel and see if there is anything showing I want to see. It is now 7:30 pm so I think I will sit here for a while and finish my latte and take care of some other things I need to on my computer and plan what I will do tomorrow.

I got to the movie theater just before 8 pm and it was showing the movie what happens in Vegas at 8 so I went ahead and bought a ticket and went. They were just showing the previews. It was really funny and I loved it. If you get a chance to see it do.

May 22, 2008 Posted by | Uncategorized | 2 Comments

full day out shopping as Susan May 21, 2008

Today was a full day of being Susan. I got up and got all dressed up and left the motel by 9:15 am. I was driving to the mall on the west end of San Francisco. I got to the Stonestown Galleria mall and went in. my first stop was bath & body works. I wanted some perfume and they had a fragrance I like in a sampler I could use. From there I went into Nordstrom’s and walked around looking at their clothes. They have a lot of beautiful outfits but they are too expensive for my budget. On my way out I walked through the cosmetic section. Several of the ladies asked if I needed help and I said no just looking. The lady at the Mac counter told me if she could help with anything just let her know. I looked for a bit and then asked her what the best way to do eye brows was? I have never been good at them. She sat me down and told me the best way is a brown to neutral eye shadow. She found a good match for my skin and showed me how to put it on. I was week so I bought the shadow, a sealer & the small brush to put it on. I walked out with my purchase $50 worth which I put on my credit card. I walked through the mall looking through all the shops. I would name them but I think I went in almost everyone. I even stopped at the food court and got a piece of pizza. When I left the mall there was a Borders book store just across the street so I walked over and looked at some books for awhile. I also needed to use the little girl’s room. When I got back to my car it was almost 1 pm, I had been there almost 3 hours.
I drove from there into downtown to the San Francisco Centre. I found a parking garage one block behind the center but with the no left turns it took me almost 15 minutes to get turned in the right direction to get in. I had to park on the fifth floor and ride the elevator down. I had to wait for the light to cross the street with a bunch of other people. When I finally got across I went into Bloomingdales and walked through the cosmetic section. One of the sales ladies called me over and said she would freshen up my makeup and asked me to have a seat. She put on a bronzer and something called glow, which added a little light to my cheeks. She gave me her card and order catalog with prices and told me if I would like to buy them just come back. She was very nice and not pushy. I then walked out into the mall. It is 5 stories high. Again I looked through all the shops. I stopped Fredrick’s of Hollywood and they had the corset I wanted but I didn’t know what size I needed. I looked around for about 20 minutes but neither of the sales ladies even so much as said hi to me so I left without buying it which saved my over $50 which I guess is good sense I spent it at Nordstrom’s. From there I went to Payless shoes to get a new pair of heels. I found a shoe I liked with an open toe 2 ½ narrow heel but they only had tan or brown color and I wanted a black. I asked the sales lady if she had any in back. A few minutes later she came back and said they were out of them but gave me a slip that showed two other stores that had it in my size. One was on the water front, and the other in Daily city which was on my way back to the motel. I decided to go for the Daily city which was a mistake. I thought this was a small city and I could find it without a map. Turns out there are over 100,000 people so I ended up driving back to the water front. I found a parking spot on the street about a ½ block up from the store. I walked down to the store and found my shoes and they were on sale her for $10.99 which was $7 less. I paid for them and went out to my car and put them on. They felt so much better. It was after 6 pm now so I had to fight rush hour traffic out of the city.
Once on the freeway back to the motel I decided to go to the Ulta store at Tanforan mall I was at last night. They were busy at the mall so I had to park way out and walk through the parking lot. I got in and looked around for a while. I checked out the OPI nail polish to see if I could match what I am wearing. I matched the color and it is called Pompeii Purple and it is beautiful. I then found some cosmetic sponges which I need so I bought a bag, only a couple bucks. From there I walked next door too Barns & Noble and looked around. They have a door into the mall and I was hungry so I went into the mall and found a place that sold hot dogs. Not a sit down meal but it did the trick. I went back to Barns & Noble and looked around a little more. It was now after 8 pm I have been out for over 11 hours. The walk to my car was a little cold as the wind seems to always blow but I was still having fun.
As I was leaving the parking lot I noticed another shopping center just down the street so I decided to drive through it and see if there are any stores I could go to tomorrow. As I drove through the parking lot I found it, a Starbucks coffee shop. So yes I did it. I parked and got my laptop computer out of my trunk. Went in and ordered a Latte and I am sitting at a table in a busy Starbucks right now typing this out instead of going back to my motel room and doing this. The time is now 9:25 pm and Susan has been out for over 12 hours. I have been at Starbuck for almost an hour; I am not as fast typing with my long nails but I am getting use to them. Nobody seems to notice or care about me being here and I know that after 12 hours my makeup can’t look that good as it did this morning even with little touch ups here and there. Well I think I will finish my Latte and then head back to my motel. It has been a great day.

May 21, 2008 Posted by | Uncategorized | 1 Comment

First full day as SusanMay 20, 2008

Well today is the day I leave Reno and go to San Francisco. I got up about 8 am (it was a short night as I was out late) and took a quick shower as I had fallen asleep last night with my makeup on as I was typing on my computer about Susan’s outing at the casino. I went down to the coffee shop in the hotel and had breakfast. After breakfast it was about 9:30 so I stopped by the front desk to find out what time checkout was. The lady at the desk told me it was 11 am and asked if I wanted to checkout now. I told her I still had to go up and pack and she told me I could go ahead and check out and then just leave the key card in the room so I went ahead and paid my bill and then went up to my room to pack. As I packed I remembered how much fun I had as Susan and sense I was all checked out I decided to be Susan for the day. I did my makeup and got dressed. I wore my black skirt, a purple top and my 3” heels. I put all my stuff from my wallet into my purse and then packed all my male close and shoes into my one suit case and my female stuff into my other suitcase (yes I took two suit cases). It was almost 11 so I left the key card on the table and made sure I had everything and left the room. When the door shut behind me I wondered if this was a good idea but as I could no longer get back into the room there was no turning back. I made my way down to the elevator and pushed the button. I got on the elevator and pushed the button for the lobby and down I went but only two floors, it stooped on the 9th floor and the doors opened and a couple got on the elevator. I was a little nervous with other people this close in such a small place but we were moving again but we stopped again and 5 people got on. It was so full you could hardly move. I was glad when we got to the lobby and we could get off the elevator. I walked the short distance through the casino to the sky walk and out to the parking lot. I was glad to be at my car. I put my suit cases in the trunk and took a paddle lock I brought and locked the suit case with my male cloths in it. I have left the key to this suit case at home so now there is no way to change back till I get home. I left Reno and drove south to Carson City and up to Lake Tahoe. It’s not the most direct way to San Francisco but I have never been to Lake Tahoe and being so close I just had to go and it was so worth it. It is so beautiful up there and the lake is so blue.

I went through South Lake Tahoe and they have several hotel casinos right on the state line between California and Nevada. I would have like to spend some time there but wanted to try to get to San Francisco before rush hour. The drive into the bay area was good and I had no problems but did not make it before rush hour so I got to sit in traffic as Susan. My motel was on the south side of San Francisco and it was almost 5 pm before I got to the hotel. I sat in the car for a little while working up my courage to go in. I knew I had no choice so I checked my makeup in the mirror, took a deep breath and took my purse and walked into the motel lobby. It’s a smaller motel that I picked because they had free parking and a good rate for San Francisco. The man behind the counter looked at me and said good evening Miss, (he actually called me Miss) are you checking in. I felt a lot better and all of a sudden I was calm. I said yes I have a reservation. He asked for my driver’s license and credit card. I took them out of my purse and handed them to him. He put the information in the computer and handed my card and ID back. I signed for the room and he gave me my card key. I thanked him and he said enjoy your stay Miss and if you need anything let us know. As I left the lobby and went outside another man was coming in and he held the door open for me. I drove over by where my room was and found a parking spot almost right in front of it. I got out and got my suit case out and went inside my room and sat down to rest. What a trip so far. The motel has free internet so I logged on and posted my blog entry for last night when I went to the casino as Susan to gamble and then I went in and redid my makeup as it was not as pretty as it was this morning when I left so I would look good for going out to dinner.

I got in my car and drove down the street south as I do not want to get caught in the traffic on the freeway. About 3 miles from my motel is a shopping center that has a Mervin’s but as I am hungry I kept going and will come back later to shop. Farther up the street I found an IHOP so I decided to stop and get dinner. I parked took my purse and went in. I was shown to a table and the waitress came and took my order. As I sat there I looked around and no one really paid any attention to me except the man who was sweeping the floor, he took a good look at me and had a puzzled look on his face. It was a lot of fun to be out in the mainstream dressed as Susan. After dinner I drove back to the shopping center that had the Mervin’s and parked and went in. I spent about 40 minutes in there looking at all the skirts and tops and even tried on some shoes. It was a lot of fun. I didn’t buy anything but had a great time. As I was leaving I saw a Barns & Nobel on the other side of the parking lot so I went over there and went in. I looked around for a while and even sat down with a book and read for a while. I stayed out till about 9 pm and then decided to call it a night as last night was short and I want to be well rested for tomorrow. What a great first day as Susan.

May 20, 2008 Posted by | Uncategorized | 2 Comments

last night gambling as Susan May 19-20, 2008

Well tonight I went out as Susan to do some gambling. The Casino I picked was called the Rail as it is a smaller casino and a little darker inside which was perfect for Susan’s first casino adventure but I had to get there first. I left my hotel room and saw no one in the hall so I made my way down to the elevator and down to the casino floor. From the elevator I only had to walk through one corner of the casino and then up over the skywalk to the parking lot. As I got off the elevator there was a lot of people playing slots right where I had to walk. I took a deep breath and started to make my way through the slots. I really don’t think anyone noticed me as they were all concentrating on their slot machines. It was a thrill but I was glad when I got to my car. I drove over to the Rail casino and chose to park on the street because it was close to the door.

I sat in my car for a few minutes and then grabbed my purse and walked in. When I got inside I went right into the back row of slots and found the poker machine I had played earlier. There was another lady about 5 machines down but we were the only two in this small section of slots. As I sat there playing something seamed different from earlier and then it hit me. It was brighter in there then it was during the day. They must turn up the lights at night. I thought about leaving but sense I was already inside and was having fun I decided to stay. When the cocktail waitress came by I ordered a drink and she took my order and brought my drink back and never said a thing about how I was dressed. I played for about an hour and a half till midnight and was down about $30 so I decided it was time to leave but wanted to take a walk through the casino. I walked through the slots and over to the ladies restroom and went in, I was so glad there was no one in there. When I came out I walked over near the table games and looked from the slots. The tables were not busy and there was a $2 Black Jack table that had no one playing at, the dealer was just standing there. I stood there for a few minutes and then noticed she had acrylic nails painted a bright red nail polish so I walked towards the table and sat sown. The dealer started to shuffle the cards and I took out $20 from my purse. It was a lot of fun and the dealer and I chatted as I played. I am sure she knew I was not female but she never let on.

I played at the table for about 45 minutes and then a new dealer came to the table. I thought about leaving but I was winning so I stayed a little longer. I ended up playing till 2:30 in the morning before going back to my hotel and won $42 dollar which made up for what I lost at the slot machine. When I got back to the Atlantis I walked though the skywalk and over to the elevators and went up to my room. It was an incredible night.

May 20, 2008 Posted by | Uncategorized | 3 Comments

Day out gambling May 19, 2008


I got up this morning and decided tto drive out and see if I could find the rail casino again. It is a small casino with no hotel and as I walked in it seemed dark inside after being out in the bright sun light. I looked around and they were not really busy so I found a poker machine and played for about an hour. This is a really nice casino and a little on the dark side which would be perfect for Susan to try an outing maybe tonight. From here I drove downtown Reno and looked around at all the casinos. There are only 7 and I found the one called Siena. I went in and they had $3 Black Jack but the tables were busy so I stood there to see if one would open. A dealer at the next table (Pia Gow poker) asked me if I wanted to play. She was standing there and no one was playing the game. I told her I didn’t know how to play. She said it was easy and explained the game to me and she seemed really nice so I decided to give it a try. The game is not that hard and it was so much fun. You tie with the dealer a lot so your money lasts longer. I had been playing about 15 minutes and still by myself when the dealer asked if I was a performer because of my nails. I said no and told her my story about the bet and she seemed fine. She even told me how to get them off and all about when she had nails and how much she liked the color. The rest of the dealers and the other players at the table seemed to pay no attention to my nails. I talked with several women at the table and they were friendly. I played from about 1 pm till after 7 pm and only lost about $10.

I drove back to my hotel and have decided to go back to the Rail casino for the rest of the night as Susan. I have cleaned up and got all dressed up with my new pants and my maroon color top. But thought I would write up today’s blog while it’s fresh in my mind and build up my courage to go out gambling. I know the Rail casino is dark inside but this casino is bright and I will have to take the elevator down from the 11th floor and walk through the edge of the casino and then up and over the sky walk to the parking lot. Well I guess I should go before I talk myself out of it. I will let you know in tomorrow’s blog how Susan does tonight. Wish me luck.

May 19, 2008 Posted by | Uncategorized | 4 Comments

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