Susanmillers Blog

My life as a heterosexual crossdresser.

New Year’s Eve 2013

Wow it is hard to believe that it is the end of 2013 already, where has the year gone. This has been a wonderful year for Susan in so many ways. I have grown so much this past year as Susan and she has become a big part of who I am. I have gotten out on a regular basis actually I think I made it out 106 times this year or at least that is how many blog posts I made this year. I have made so many awesome friends and I have a wonderful girlfriend who I share with my male self, life is wonderful for both sides of me but then again this blog is about Susan so let’s get back to her.

Well I knew some of the girls were going out to Sweethome so even though I had to work New Year’s Day I just had to go out for a little while at least. Actually Heather one of the Karaoke group had told me she was going and was going to wear a dress, heels, makeup and do her hair for New Year’s so I just had to go and get a picture with her. Yes I love being in pictures and for special night I can remember to get picture. This is Heather on the left, me in the middle and Lynn on the right.

Now I chose to wear my red dress as I don’t get much of a chance to wear it plus as you can see I can do a good job of creating breast and cleavage with this dress and yes it is a little tight which helps. I think that helps make the feminine look.

Well I got to Sweethome a little after 7 and Chris and Christine were already there. Now there was a new bartender well maybe not new but just one we hadn’t met yet but he was awesome and treated us great. Well I ordered dinner as I had worked late so I was hungry and we watched the end of the Portland Trail Blazer basketball game and believe it or not a couple of the woman there watching the game made more noise and cheered harder than most of the men so it just goes to show you don’t have to be male to love sports.

Well it wasn’t long and more girls started to show up starting with Teresa. She was on her way to another party but stopped in for a couple hours to spend some time with us which was awesome. I just had to get a picture with her plus I wanted one to send to Cassandra and Peggy as they couldn’t make it tonight and I wanted them to feel they were still with us in spirit, one of the great things about a cell phone is you can take a picture and send it in a text and post to your Facebook page in a matter of seconds. I had a chance to talk with Teresa for a while which was so nice. It is funny how much Susan loves to sit around and chat about almost anything.

Well Laura, Jan, Lynn and Petra also showed up so we had a small but fun group. I figured with New Year’s being on a Tuesday night we wouldn’t have a big turnout especially after having a good turnout Friday night and also for the Holiday party we had on Saturday night. I think New Year’s is a bigger thing when it falls on a Friday or Saturday night.

It was great to have a chance to spend some time with my friends and even though I knew I wouldn’t make it till midnight it would be an awesome way to end the old year. Well it looked like the Karaoke group was going to have a good turnout as they had a lot of their people there earlier than normal. It is funny as we have made so many good friends with their group as they have made us feel so welcomed over the last year in a half, wow it is hard to believe we have been coming here that long but it was in August 10 of 2012 when we first came here and everyone has been so wonderful to us we have come here pretty much every Friday since. It is just such a friendly neighborhood bar kind of like the bar in the TV show Cheers where everyone knows your name. I would highly recommend this place to anyone.

Well Craig was doing Karaoke tonight so he was setting up by 9 and the place was already packed and Paul was handing out New Year’s hats and Tiara’s and what girl doesn’t love a Tiara even if it is cardboard. I was so tempted to get one but as I would not be there at midnight I didn’t to make sure they would have enough for those who were there plus I have a few from past years. Well we had got the picture of Heather, me and Lynn and it turns out Chris wanted to be in the picture and so we took another one, yes you can never have to many picture and I guess it is not just T-girls who like to have their picture taken, left to right Chris, Heather, Susan, and Lynn. Well while we were taking the picture Jan also wanted in and so we had to get another one, everyone loves to be in pictures. What a pretty looking bunch of girls and a handsome boy.

Well it got late and I had planned on leaving by 9 but as always it didn’t work out that way and it was almost 9:30 by the time I said my goodbyes and paid my bill. It was sad I could stay and usher in the New Year with my friends but work has to come first as that is how my male side buys things for Susan and allows her to go out and have fun, my male side is so generous to Susan he pretty much lets her have what she wants. I joke about this all the time and I don’t want people to think that I really do think of them as two different people as I know I am the same person as Susan or my male self but there are differences in the way I act, think and look at life and it is the blending of the two that make me who I am and so happy.

Well I hope you all had a wonderful New Year’s night and I wish you all a safe and Happy New Year and May you find all the happiness you deserve. Okay here is the last picture, left to right, Chris, Heather, Jan behind Heather, Susan and Lynn, what a great picture.

Thanks for reading my blog, I never thought when I started my blog it would be something others would read but you have and I am thankful for that.

January 1, 2014 Posted by | Holiday, Sweethome | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Happy New Year to all

Well it is the start of a new year and I hope you each had a fun and safe New Years Eve. I had not planned on going out for New Years as I had to work late and of course had to work early new Years Day but as luck would have it I got off early so had time to get Susan ready and figured I could at least go out for dinner plus I could think of no better way to end the year than with my awesome friends.

I got to Sweethome by 6:30 and went in and there were already several girls there and more showing up all the time. Cassandra and Peggy showed up, this was the first time Peggy has been to Sweethome so that was cool; she also had on this really cute dress and some awesome heels. It was nice to see here out again and have a chance to talk with her.

I had a nice dinner and spent some time with my friends for a couple hours. The bar gave us all cute little hats to wear for New Years. It was a fun night and I was sad I could only stay till 8:30 as I know they all had an awesome time. It has been a really fun week.

Actually Saturday night some of us got together at Cassandra and Peggy’s home for a going away party for Victoria. She is leaving this coming Friday for Thai land as she is going to have her SRS surgery which she has been waiting for and dreaming of for a long time. I really have met some awesome friends over the past few years that I would not have met had it not been for my Susan side of my life. I really do have a wonderful life and I look forward to what my life holds in the future and I am sure Susan will be a big part of my life.

I really think this is what makes our group such an awesome group is we are all a little different and have different needs and wants out of life but we all share a common bond, the need to be feminine. Victoria is fulfilling her dream and transitioning and I have my dream of living part of my life as Susan.

I wish you all a safe and Happy New Years and May this year be the best yet, may you all find joy and happiness in your lives.

Hugs to you all!

January 1, 2013 Posted by | Holiday | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

New Years 2012

Well it is a New Year now but what a fun time we had celebrating the New Year. Our group the Rose City T-Girls were going to meet at the P-Club at 7 and have a fun night. I was feeling a lot better so decided to wear my red dress as I don’t wear it that often. Was a little worried I might get cold but turns out I was fine the whole night long. I got to the P-Club about 6:30 and went in, I thought some of the girls might be early but turns out I was by myself till 7 when about 10 girls all showed up at one time. I got a couple tables as I knew we would have a good turnout. It was pretty slow at this time and one of the bar staff came over to see if I wanted anything, her name was April and she has worked a couple times on Fridays when we have been there so she kind of knows us. I was hungry so I went ahead and ordered a salad.

Several of the girls met at Cassandra’s and car pooled down so they would have designated drivers so everyone would get home safe, any way right at 7 pm about 10 of them all walked in at one time. It was almost like a parade. It is great that we do it this way as we really want to avoid anyone getting a DUI or worse having a wreck and getting hurt. Every years Cassandra makes sure we have designated drivers and it is usually easy as we have several girls who don’t drink.

Now I had to work Sunday morning but not super early so I figured I could stay till we ushered in the New Year and then leave and still get 5 hours of sleep so I was excited as last year I had to be up at 3 am so last year I only stayed till a little after 10.we had such a good turnout, I bet 30 or more from our group were there. It was so nice to see so many out at one time.

Maya was there and she had on this really cute dress so of course I had to get a picture with her. It was a black dress off the shoulder on one side and all sparkly. We had a good chance to talk which is always nice as she is working a lot now. Would be nice if she could get out more with the group but making a living must come first after all how else can a girl buy new clothes and makeup.

Teresa was there, she just got back from Thai Land, she had SRS surgery on December 6 and just got back on Dec 26 and is doing great and so happy. It is nice to see her out again and having fun. Got to talk with her about her trip and how she liked Thai Land. She pretty much stayed close to her hotel and hospital which I can understand as this was not a vacation.

Peggy was also there and it is always great to see her, she is Cassandra’s wife and so supportive of her and all of us for that matter and just a really good friend. She has met me at Starbucks a few times which is always nice. I should see if Peggy and Cassandra want to do dinner again as that is also a lot of fun.

Sophia and her wife Lorna also made it. They are also a really nice couple and fun. Lorna has some great stories and always fun to talk with her. We must have sat and talked for an hour. Seems they had a little electrical problem over Christmas and had no power which meant no heat.

We also had a new girl show up, Niky and her GG friend Bonnie. They were both so nice and easy to talk with. Bonnie is really supportive of T-Girls which is really nice. I think they met online and hit it off. Had a good chance to talk with Bonnie and Niky and get to know them a little which is always nice. It is always a little hard at first as you want to get to know them but don’t want to just ask them a bunch of questions and make them feel uncomfortable. I look forward to them coming out again so we can talk more. I should have gotten a picture with Niky as she is taller than me and I always love having my picture taken with tall girls as it makes me feel a little more petite.

I did play one game of shuffle board, Kelly and I took on Melisa and Katherine. It was a fun game and of course Kelly and I won. The shuffle board table really needs to be cleaned though as it was really sticky in some spots. In all it was a great night. The P-Club was not super busy as people would come for a while and then leave and more would come. Isaac was also working and he always works Friday so he knows us all really well, really the staff here is really awesome and they all make us feel welcome when we are there.

Brooke also made it out again which is nice. She has had a lot going on in her life lately and she really needs time out with her friends. I know how much I enjoy it so I can sympathize with her when she cannot get out. I hope she can get out more on a regular basis as we all love it when she comes out. We got a chance to talk for a while and of course one more picture after all it is New Years Eve.

We had an awesome night and at Midnight we made so many toasts to everyone and anything we could think of. The most important of all were our friendships we have made. It was about 12:30 when I finally left and went home. It would be a short night and I was tired today at work but it was so worth it and I would not have missed it for anything as I can think of no better way to start the New Year off then with good friends.

I want to wish all of you the Happiest of New Years, may your year be filled with joy, happiness and peace and may this New Year bring you all you deserve and want. I have so many wonderful friends both online and here in my group and I want you all to know how much your friendship and support means to me. Hugs to you all.

January 1, 2012 Posted by | Holiday, New Years, P-Club | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 2 Comments

At Starbucks 3 nights before Christmas

Well it is December 22nd and Christmas is just 3 days away and I am already for it now. I have all my shopping done and can now sit back and relax which means a little Susan time at Starbucks. For some reason it seems Christmas came quicker this year so I was really rushing around more than normal so much so I didn’t even buy Susan a gift, well I did get this really cute cream color shawl wrap. Jessica let me borrow hers as I thought it was really cute. I was right as I wore it once and then just had to get one for me, thanks Jessica for letting me borrow it. I plan to do some shopping after Christmas for Susan. I also have a free pedicure I won at the Halloween party which I really need to use as my toe nails are looking pretty bad. Roxy one of the girls in our group is going to beauty school and Cassandra gave away some pedicures as prizes to help her out as she needs people to practice on.

I am sitting at Starbucks right now and they busy but a couple tables open which is nice, so much easier to be on my computer at a table. It really is relaxing to just sit here on my computer with a nice warm drink. I really can’t explain it but when I am Susan I just want to be out and about. It is funny as a few years back dressing up at home and just hanging out there was so much fun, I think it was mostly I was scared about going out especially by myself. It is amazing how much I have grown as Susan, even in the last couple years.

Even after I started going out I would usually get to where I was going and sit in the car for a while and check things out. See what is going on and who is going in and out before I would get out of my car. Now I pretty much just pull up and get out of the car and go in. Now there are times that I can feel a little uneasy or nervous but it is usually a matter of feeling safe instead of worried how I am dressed. I am sure there are times GG’s and even men feel this way so not just a T-Girl reaction. We live in a time that we all need to be mindful when we are out and as Susan I think I am a little extra a where of that.

Starbucks has slowed down now maybe 8 other people here so a little quiet but still a nice place to be. At the winter gala party I talked to Peggy and Kathy about maybe meeting for coffee one night but would need to be over in Portland I think as the Starbucks I go to is a long drive for them or maybe we could do a dinner again as that is always fun two. I think having a girls night out every once in a while is awesome, maybe even a movie night. The only bad part is I get up so early during the week for work I can’t stay out to late.

Well the rest of the year will be busy for me as I am working extra hours which are good as it is extra money but makes for a tired Susan. I will of course be out tomorrow night with my Friends at the P-club. Spending time with my friends is so much fun, I really believe if it was not for them and their support I would still be hiding in my house. Not sure how good of a turn out we will have as some may be out of town for Christmas.

Next week I should be able to make Starbucks as I should have every night open which almost never happens. Maybe even make an extra night for shopping. Next weekend will be busy also as I will be out on Friday and Saturday night. Saturday which is New Years Eve I just can’t miss even though I may not be able to stay out to late as I have to work New Years day, just not sure how early yet. I am hoping I don’t have to be to work till 7am but could be earlier which would suck. Last year I had to leave at 10 at least that was my goal. I think it was closer to 11 when I finally left the club.

Our group is really great as we are already working on designated drivers for New Years Eve. Several of the girls in the group including me do not drink so there is never a problem making sure everyone gets home safe. Wish I had the next day off so I could be one of the designated drivers as I want everyone to be safe. If you go out for New Years Eve please be safe and make sure you have a safe way home.

Well I guess I will sign off here. I would like to wish everyone a Merry Christmas. If you do not celebrate Christmas than a Happy Holiday.

December 22, 2011 Posted by | Starbucks | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Last day of the year shopping trip

Well December 31 2010 is here and as the year comes to an end I went shopping this morning. I had hoped to get an earlier start but for some reason Susan takes longer in the morning to get ready then the evening. I started off by going to see if I could get a wig to replace the one I wear almost all the time. The blonde one in my profile pictures. I have been looking online and not able to find it so I went to Wells Wigs which is where I bought it 3 years ago. I got there about 11:00 and went in. Just as I was afraid of they do not make that style any more. The ladies there were really nice and I tried on several different wigs which was fun in itself. I did find one that I liked the style and looked good on me I thought and so did the ladies working there so I went ahead and bought it. A little more expensive then I planned and of course I wore it out putting my old wig in the box. It is longer than my other one and the lady there told me it would help keep the ends from frizzing if I kept it from rubbing on clothes so she recommended I buy a hair clip and when driving my car clip the hair up to keep it from rubbing between me and the seat. So of course that meant a trip to Rite Aid across the street. They were not busy at all so I was in and out pretty quick.

My next stop was Lloyd Center. On the way there driving in the sun I noticed the new wig is more blonde then my other one so I will have to get use to it. I got to Lloyd Center and parked by Sears and went in. my first stop was the shoe section and they had some of the cutest boots on sale for half off. I found 3 I really liked but the largest size was a 10 which I could get my foot in but not zip up the side, if only they had it in a 10 wide. From there I went to check out their closeout section but most of what they had was junior or petite sizes so I moved on to check out the rest of the store. I was surprised how busy the mall was on a Friday during the day. I went out into the mall and walked down to Torrid and looked around. Nothing really jumped out at me so I decided to head for home as I wanted to beat the traffic. I figured being a Friday and New Years Eve people would leave work early.

I had my computer with me in the car and as I was cold, open toed shoes and nylons do not keep your feet warm when it is below freezing out. I thought about stopping at Starbuck’s but as I have gone there the last two nights in a row I decided to try another one. There is one about 3 miles from the one I always go to and I have been there before. It is actually the first one I ever went to and had gone there a few times till they started to remodel it and were closing at 7 and as Susan is an evening girl most of the time I went to the other one and got to know the girls there and well you know the rest. Anyway I stopped in and they were pretty busy. This one has a drive through also so I was surprised to see how many people were inside during the day.

Any way I ordered my drink and was getting my computer set up when I heard someone call my name, not my male name but Susan. I turned around and it was Katie who worked at the one I go to all the time. Turns out they moved her to this one as the Assistant Manager. It was so cool to see her as I think the last time I saw her was back in July. She remembered my name and even complimented me on my new hair, how sweet is that. We talked for a few minutes and she told me I need to stop in at this one now. She works the day shifts so I guess if I want to go to Starbuck’s during the day this is the one I will have to come to. Anyway I got on line and Cassandra was also on line so we chatted for a while. They really want me to come out tonight even for just a couple hours so now I am thinking maybe I will. If I got home and in bed by 11 I could get maybe 5 hours of sleep before I have to get up and rush off to work. It would really make me tired tomorrow but for one night I think I could so yes I think I will go out tonight and see all my wonderful friends.

I wish you all a happy Safe New Year and may next year be better than this year. Be safe!

December 31, 2010 Posted by | shopping, Starbucks | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment

Susan out with friends on New Year’s Eve

Well as we start 2010 I hope you all had a Happy and safe New Years Eve and wish you all the best for 2010.

Susan had a fabulous New Years Eve. For such a special night I wore my red dress to go out to Embers. We had a lot of T-girls going out and as it was New Years we arranged for designated drivers this year so more could get out and be safe and not rick getting into trouble by drinking too much. Cassandra our group leader came up with the idea and coordinated it which I thought was a great idea, way to go Cass. We have several t-girls that don’t drink, (I know why are we going to bars, well it is about being out with friends not drinking) so we had members that were willing to drive. I picked up one Charlene and we drove together to Embers which made the drive more fun. Being New Years Eve I thought it would be really crowded so we tried to get there as early as possible. We arrived about 7:30 and found parking on the street just a half block over and even the parking lot across the street was empty.

When we got inside same thing, there were not many people there. Peggy, Bev, Maya and Teresa were inside and had two tables as we expected a large group. Not long after Cassandra and Samantha showed up and soon more and more t-girls started to show up. Barb, Lea, Lynn, Jan, Siobhan, Christine, Roxy, Kathryn, Rachel and I am sure I am forgetting someone and I am sorry for that. We took a third tables as our numbers now demanded it and we wanted to make sure we had enough seats for everyone in our group but even with three tables we still had more t-girls than seats. Now about 8 pm they came around and collected $10 from everyone (but we did get cute hats and noise makers). I have posted some pictures on my Flickr page with my cute hat. We all had our cameras out taking pictures before the show and while the crowd was still small.

By the time the show started the crowd had grown to standing room only and the crowd was really in a festive mood. Then show was good and they did some songs I had not seen before. We were all having a fun time. As midnight got close Peggy and Cassandra bought several bottles of Champagne for a New Year’s toast, Thanks to both of you that was very generous. Now even though I don’t drink I did have a half glass of Champagne at mid night with everyone. I figured it was a special occasion and I was with my best friends and that deserved a drink.

After midnight the drag Queens all got on stage and did the song Time warp from the Rocky Horror Picture Show. This is something they do every year and the whole crowd were on their feet and joined in with them. It was a lot of fun and after that the show went on and we once again were talking and watching the show. The night was so much fun and I got to start my New Year off with all my friends.

As I look forward to the New Year I hope to get to know all my friends better and for us to grow closer and stay the best of friends. I have never really liked the idea of a New Year’s resolution as I think that puts undo pressure and if you can’t keep them it can make you upset so I will not do that, but I will set some goals to shoot for.

1 I want to continue to go out once a week with all my friends.
2 To feel more comfortable out as Susan.
3 To go out in the real world more, not just gay clubs.
4 Buy more pretty dresses, skirts, & shoes (Susan needs a bigger wardrobe).

I wish you all a safe and Happy New Year’s and may all your resolutions or goals be attainable and the year ahead be filled with good friends and family.

January 1, 2010 Posted by | CD, crossdress, crossdresser, crossdressing, Holiday, New Years, T-girl, transgender | , , , , , , , , , , | Leave a comment


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