Susanmillers Blog

My life as a heterosexual crossdresser.

Rose City T-girl Winter Gala

Well Saturday night was our 3rd annual Winter Gala, Kathy and Mandie open there home each year and host this wonderful party with the help of Danielle and I am sure others. I have been looking forward to this for weeks now. I wore my long black dress which I got for the T-Girl pageant 2 years ago. I really don’t have much of a chance to wear it as this is only the second time. Now the funny thing is when I wore it last at the pageant I had help and really never thought about it but being a tight dress I found it hard to zip up the back by myself. Took a little work but I did manage to get it on. Getting into the car and driving was also a challenge in a long dress. I guess I will just have to wear it more to get use to it.

I got to their home just before 6 pm and there were already people there. They had so much food set out and a friend making drinks at their bar, their friend who’s name escapes me I have met before as she has come out with them with the group a few time. She had on the cutes outfit, kind of a miss clause look so I had to get a picture with her. The first and only picture I got as my batteries went dead, I guess I really am blonde as I should have taken extra batteries but there were lots of other cameras there so I will have other pictures. The food they had was awesome, so delicious and so much they really out did themselves.

We had a good turn out; I would guess 40 made it to the party including Teresa who joined us on Skype from Thailand. She had SRS surgery a week ago and is not recovering over there for a few more weeks. It was good to see her even if only on the computer. It really is amazing what technology can do now days. There were a few girls that only come out to the parties so it was good to see them again.

Jessica and Trisha (Trisha was in male mode) also made it. I would never have recognized Trisha if it had not been for her wife with her. I give her a lot of credit for this as it is still something I can’t do. Now there are a few friends that have seen me as my male self and a few others I would be totally comfortable meeting that way but still don’t think I could just show up in front of so many as my male self. It was good to see them again and get time to talk to them. They are an awesome couple and Jessica is so supportive of Trisha. We only met a little while ago but we have become good friends as they have a way to make you feel so welcome and at ease.

Robyn a t-girl from Seattle was also there. I met her at the Halloween party and she joined our group so she came down for the party and I got a chance to talk with her also. She has also started to go to Starbucks up by her house.

Jenn also made it; I first met her at the Halloween party to. She also has an accepting wife which is awesome. She also has only been out a few times and never out in public. I hope she will come out more with the group to the P-Club, she also lives not far from the Starbucks I go to so maybe someday we can meet there.

Cassandra and her wife Peggy were there of course, Cassandra brought her laptop so we could Skype with Teresa that way we could see her and she could see all of us. Peggy and Jessica both had on the same cute black dress. Jessica had added some sparkle to hers so they did look a little different but Peggy was the one who realized it.

Wow so many wonderful friends were at the party and everyone looked so pretty. The dresses that were there were awesome. It was a perfect night. Jan won the contest for the highest heels at 4 ½ inches. We also had our T-Girl walk; we all one at a time descended the stairs, at the bottom we gave our name and curtsied then sat down in a chair. All the GG’s judged us on this and in the end Marla won. She really did come down the stairs well. It is funny as a guy you don’t think about such things but as a girl descending stairs in 4″ heel and a long dress is a challenge. I will have to work on this more for next year’s party.

Most of the night we just sat and chatted which I really do enjoy plus since I had on 4″ heels sitting was good as I went the whole night without removing them. The white room where they have their Christmas tree is where I spent most of the night, Peggy, Jessica, Trisha, Victoria, Jan, Lynn and Robyn were all there and we just chatted four hours. It really is funny how fast the night went. Soon it was midnight and we all wondered where the time went. People started to leave and the night was coming to an end. I didn’t want the night to end but knew it had to as I had to be up early Sunday morning. It was about 12:30 when I started saying goodnight to all my wonderful friends. It was truly a magical night and I lo0ok forward to the next party and the next time I get to see my friends.

A big thanks to Kathy and Mandie for opening their home for such a grand party. You two are awesome.


December 11, 2011 Posted by | Christmas, Party | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 4 Comments

Dinner with friends at Henry’s tavern

Well Saturday night I was meeting several of my friends from the group downtown Portland at Henry’s Tavern, now I have never been there before but several of the girls from the group had been there and said it was nice. I was really looking forward to this as I love going new places. We had reservations for 10 of us at 8 pm but were planning on meeting there at 7pm. Not knowing the parking situation I got there a little early and as luck would have it someone pulled out as I came around the corner so I found a spot really easy and only 2 blocks away. Now it was really cold out about 35 and of course I wore a short skirt and heel so the 2 block walk was a little cold.

I got to Henry’s right at 7 pm and went in; they were really busy with maybe a dozen people waiting. I checked with the hostess to see if anyone had checked in yet and they hadn’t so I went to check the bar which turns out is huge and has an second floor. There were no seats in the downstairs part of the bar and only a few in the upstairs but none of our group were there so I went back and took a seat by the door and waited. It was only a few minutes when Peggy and Teresa showed up so the 3 of us went to the bar on the second floor and found the one open table. It wasn’t long and Cassandra, Victoria, Trisha, Jessica and Cassie showed up. We were having a good time just talking when they told us our table was ready so we all went down to the restaurant part. We were still waiting for Lynn and Jan so we held off ordering for a little while and just continued our conversation. We were having a fun time.

There was a both right next to our table with for ladies at and soon Cassandra was chatting with them, turns out one of them was having a birthday, Betsy the other three were Holly, Ingra and Brooke. Well we all sang happy birthday to her and the next thing you know Cassandra is sitting next to Holly and Ingra getting pictures with two of them. It is amazing how Cassandra can do that. Well of course not wanting to miss out on a photo op I went and sat next to Brooke and Betsy and got some pictures. You can see all my pictures with different looks on my Flickr page. The girls were really awesome and didn’t seem to have a problem with us there.

We ordered food and everything looked good. Their prices are a little more than places we usually go but the food was awesome. I had their Macaroni and Cheese and it was awesome. Jan and Lynn finally showed up and joined us. Our waiter well he was awesome too, always referred to us as ladies and even offered to take some pictures of us so we could all be in the picture. It was a real enjoyable dinner and before we knew it, it was 10:30 pm; I don’t know where the time went. It seems every time we are out in a group the time goes by so fast. Well we spent a little time deciding where we wanted to go next and settled on Fox and Hound so off we went.

Now parking downtown Portland on a Saturday night at that time is almost impossible so several of us talked about car pooling down to make it easier so I rode with Trisha and Jessica, funny thing is everyone else just drove themselves. Any way the three of us walked the 2 blocks to their car. And it was really cold out by now especially my toes as my heels were open toe type. It was nice to have someone to walk with since it was so late out. Fox and hound is not that far away so it didn’t take long to get there.

We ordered some drinks and then just sat around and talked some more. Fox and Hound is not a really busy place and gives you a nice place to just sit and talk. It was such a fun night, just a group of ladies enjoying friends. They also have a pool table but none of us played pool which surprised me as some of the girls really love pool.

Well before we knew it, it was 1:30 am again the time went by so fast. We all walked out and said our goodbyes. Trisha and Jessica gave me a ride back to my car. Jessica had a pair of heels that were just a little too big for her and kept slipping off her heel. She also let me borrow her shawl that I liked for a bit which was really nice of her. As it turns out we wear almost the same size except that my feet are a little wider. I tried them on when I got home and the toes are tight but I had the same problem with them slipping off my heel of course I had on nylons so that may have been the reason they slip off. Maybe I will try them without nylons and see if that fit a little better.

It was such a fun night several of us talked about maybe doing a dinner once a month at a different restaurant which I think would be an awesome idea. We even talked a little about Diva Las Vegas and I think this year we may have several from the group go.

Thanks for reading

November 20, 2011 Posted by | Out and about as Susan | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment

Saturday afternoon shopping trip

Well as it turns out I had all day Saturday off and I have been wanting to do a little shopping trip for Susan so this was my chance. I had been chatting with Trisha and her and her wife Jessica were going to be in Portland to go out to dinner with our group Saturday night so they just came to town early and we agreed to meet at Lloyd Center around noon to do a girls day out shopping trip. Now I have never been a big fan of cell phone or any phone for that matter as I would much rather talk in person and I am not a big fan of texting but in this case my cell phone was awesome as it allowed up to figure out when and where we would meet and find each other really easy.

Well we met up about 12:30 by the Sears door and started our little adventure. No9w being a Saturday afternoon and not that far from Christmas the mall was pretty busy but I never gave that a thought, I really think having friends with you makes it so much easier. We made a quick trip through Sears and then right out into the mall. It really is amazing when you think about how girls shop. My male self goes in get what is needed and leaves but girl’s, Susan included loves to just walk around and look at all the pretty, cute outfits in all the colors. Even dresses I would never have a reason or ability to wear are fun to look at.

We were having a great time just walking around and talking but did check out some of the stores. We of course had to go into Torrid’s, their prices are a little higher priced but their clothes fit the bigger girls like me, actually I wear a size zero skirt from them so that is worth a little extra. They had some rally cute tops and a beautiful grey skirt but they did not have one in my size, yes they were all too big for me so not to unhappy about that. Jessica tried on a couple skirts but had the same problem to big so we all left feeling pretty good about ourselves.

We walked around some more through the mall still talking and not paying any attention to the people around us and they did the same as I really never saw anyone look twice at us but then I wasn’t really watching them either. Our next stop was Ross Dress for Less, now I don’t think the one at Lloyd Center has that good a selection or maybe they are just busy enough that their selection is picked over.

Again we were out in the mall and walking around like it was the most normal thing we could do, we of course had to stop at Fredrick’s of Hollywood. They had some of the cutest outfits, and there was one pink and black one that was awesome but their biggest size was still half of what I would need but still fun to look around.

Next we went to Lane Bryant and again they cater to us bigger girls so there were things that would fit me there. They were having a big sale so that is always nice. Trisha and I went over to check out their boots as I really want to find a new pair for the winter. I am looking for a mid calf boots with a 2″ or 3″ spike heel and seems this is hard to find. The ones they had with the heel I want were only ankle, the ones that went mid calf were flats so I guess I will have to keep looking. They also had dresses on sale but silly me I forgot to go look at them.

The last store we checked out was called Icing and they sell costume jewelry. Well I don’t know why I started looking at their earrings and they had some of the cutest clip on earrings and of course they were buy one get one 50% off so yes I made a purchase and bought two pairs. Jessica also bought 2 for Trisha. I of course used my Susan credit card. I was showing it to Jessica and she asked me how I got it so I told her. I think they may get one for Trisha now.

We decided to go up to the food court and get a little lunch as we were a little hungry and knew we wouldn’t be eating till late tonight as we are not meeting the group till 7 pm at Henry’s. we got our food and then went and found a table to eat at. again no one really looked at us this time I was watching as there were a lot of young people there. We had an enjoyable lunch and the whole time we spent talking. It was a really relaxing enjoyable day out shopping with the girls.

By now it was about 3:30, boy had the time gone by fast so it was time to leave. Trisha and Jessica had to go check into their hotel and get cleaned up and change for dinner tonight. On the way out we were talking about what we would wear tonight and it hit me how different my male side and female side are. My male side would never worry about this or even change clothes just to go out to dinner with friends. Susan just can’t seem to wear the same outfit for shopping and dinner plus need to redo my makeup, different shoes and even different nail color to match my outfit for tonight. Outside we said goodbye and gave hugs, girls do that sort of thing Jessica said which is true. As Susan I always give a hug when I leave something my male side never does which is a shame as a nice hug makes you feel so much better. Maybe that is the problem in the world today, not enough hugs. I walked back to my car and was thinking the whole time how comfortable I was and not the least bit nervous or scared to be out as Susan. Wow how far have I come in the last couple years as Susan? I know it is all because of my wonderful awesome friends I have made so a big thanks to all of you.

Well it is almost 5 pm so Susan needs to get a move on and get ready to go out to dinner. Thanks for reading.

November 19, 2011 Posted by | Out and about as Susan, shopping | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 6 Comments

P-Club with friends

Well Friday got here and not too soon. I have been looking forward to this weekend all week as I hoped to make it out all three days but it looks like only Friday and Saturday nights now but that is still awesome as I get to have some Susan time.

We normally meet at the P-Club at 7:30 but one of the girls posted she would be there by 7 so that was my plan also if I could get Susan ready early which is way easier now that it is dark by 5. I wasn’t sure how many girls would show up tonight with the group going out Saturday night but it would still be a fun night. I T-Girl I have chatted with online a few time, Trisha Boots and her wife would be in Portland this weekend and were going to meet me at the P-Club to meet some of the girls in the group so I was looking forward to that as it is always so much fun to meet new people.

Well I got all dressed and chose to wear my grey sweater dress as it was a little cold outside tonight plus I like the way it looks. Looking back I maybe should have saved it for Saturday night as we will be walking 5 blocks to and from Harvey’s but oh well can’t wear the same outfit twice in a week, wow I am such a girl as my male self would never worry about something like that.

Got to the P-Club just a little after 7 and Cassandra, Chris, Robyn and Bobby were already there and so our fun night started. I ordered something to eat and a drink, my normal 7-up and we sat and talked for a bit. Bobby and I played a game of pool and in the end I won so that means I have not lost a pool game in over 3 months, well actually it was the only game of pool I have played in 3 months but sounds way better the other way.

Trisha and her wife Jessica showed up and after introducing myself I introduced them to the group that was there. Made me think back to when I first met the group, I think there were only 20 members at the time and the night I met them I think only 4 of them were out and that was a little overwhelming at the time so it was good that at this point the group there was small but by the end of the night there were about 25 of us there.

Talking with Trisha and Jessica this is pretty new to them, Trisha has only gone out a few times and only came out to her wife a few months ago and yet her wife, Jessica is so supportive of her which is so awesome. Turns out we had a couple wives show up last night which was good as I hoped that would make it a little easier for Jessica. We had a fun night and spent most of it just talking. They really are an awesome couple and hope they join our group. We invited them to go to Harvey’s with us tonight and they accepted so we will all get to see them again tonight and talk more. It was a shame Peggy (Cassandra’s wife) couldn’t make it as I think Jessica and her would have really hit it off. Peggy so loves when the other wives come out with the group.

It was good to see Jan and Lynn out again and spend some time talking to them, they are the ones who got the first batch of tickets for the Saturday night show, big thanks to them for that. Victoria and I played Jan and Trisha in a shuffle board game. It was a lot of fun and yes Victoria and I won but it was a close game plus I don’t think Trisha had ever played so we had a slight advantage.

Sophia and Lorna were also there, didn’t see them come in but got over to chat with them for a bit. They are also going to Harvey’s and their son is going with them. Harvey’s will be such a fun night as I think we have 21 or 22 going which will be our biggest group yet.

In all it was a fantastic night, made some new friends and spent the evening with some of my best friends in the world. What could be better? It was funny talking to Trisha and Jessica and some of the fears they had going out to meet the group were some of the same that I went through and probably every girl in the group. Just goes to show that although we are all different and dress for different reasons we all share a common bond and I think that is what makes for such good friendships.

It is just fun to get together and talk about things, why we dress and what makes us who we are. Tips on how we dress, makeup, nails as that is how we all learn. We even talked about Diva Las Vegas and I am still hoping to get a group together from Portland to go next year, April 22 to 27 so mark your calendars. It is so nice to just have friends you can be yourself with and talk.

Have a great day and thanks for reading. I will post again about Harvey’s and hope to get some pictures tonight.

November 12, 2011 Posted by | P-Club | , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , | 1 Comment


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