Saturday November 9th at the Escape

Yes, once again I am a week behind in writing my blog, busy, busy week, I am sitting at the Escape this week writing about last week. Well it was Saturday and I was able to get out as Susan and I was looking forward to it as the next few weeks will be very busy for me and that means limited Susan time. No because of this I wanted to get out early so I could have as much time as possible. I was ready and on my way by 5 and got to the Escape about 5:20 and found a parking spot right in front and went in. they were not busy so I got one of the big tables in hopes we would have a good turnout tonight. I ordered dinner, Pancakes as I am trying to eat healthier well cut out fried foods like Hamburgers. I got out my computer and passed times as I waited to see who would all show up.

It was a little before 7 and Bobbie showed up and also Danika. Bobbie has been coming pretty regular but this might be Danika’s first time here at the Escape as it is usually our Wednesday night dinners where I see her. I put away my computer so we could talk as Danika is one of our newer members so I really don’t know her all that well and this is the perfect chance to get to know her better. We actually have a lot in common, she is retired but what she did for work is the same as some of what I do now. It was really nice to talk with her and get to know her. she is married and her wife is supportive but also worried about people finding out. We talked about relationships and how being trans effects it and it does. Although I have never been married, I did come close once.

Now years ago, I told myself if I met the right lady this would all go away and I would stop and of course that never happened as I know now Susan is to much a part of who I am to go away. Now I will say it was never about Susan that the relationships didn’t work out as I never told them although it might have been part of the reason I never got really serious in some of them as I knew I wouldn’t quit being Susan and couldn’t bring myself to tell them. I also realize now that if I do get into a serious relationship, I would have to tell them about Susan as she really is a big part of my life and who I am and that makes it hard. now I did date a really nice lady for a while who I actually met as Susan but even that one didn’t work out and Susan had nothing to do with it. I will say being Trans really does make relationships complicated though. I know there are ladies out there that are okay with it but the problem is you don’t know till you talk about it and at that point you have opened yourself up as the old saying goes once you let the genie out of the bottle you can’t get him back in. Now I know one of my neighbors knows about me and probably most of my neighbors do but they have no connection to where I work or my family or friends so there is still some safety. In a relationship they will meet your family and friends and probably your co-workers at some point as they will be part of your whole life. I have some friends on my male side and they are good friends but I still keep a distance because of Susan, some of them I think would be okay with it but again till you tell them you never really know. It really is true that my friends I have made as Susan are my closest friends as I don’t have to hide who I am really. Some of the girls are really more like sisters and probably know me as well as I do and I am so lucky to have them in my life. It was nice to talk with Danika about this as I really haven’t thought about it for a while.

Well another girl from our group showed up so we had 4 of us here. Now it was really busy here tonight once Karaoke started as they did have a big party and two groups with birthdays in them, we had a great time and a little after 10 Danika called it a night as she has about a 1 ½ hour drive home. Now one of our girls was over playing pool so it was just Bobbie and me at the big tables so I told Bobbie we should move over to one of the smaller tables so one of the big groups of people standing could have the table. Now I stayed till a little after 11 before calling it a night. it was a fun night and enjoyed it as for the next several weeks my Susan time will be limited to Saturday nights and if I am lucky maybe a Sunday at Starbucks but that won’t happen this week so it will be next Saturday before I can get out again.

Thanks for reading and be sure and read my most recent blog to see what is new in my life.